Hello, let me introduce myself first..
For the first 30 years of my life, everything was smooth and worry-free. I was my parents’ most beloved child, found my true love in college, and happily married him after graduation.
At work, I was my boss’s most valued employee. Whenever I was in charge of a project, colleagues would inevitably say, “Oh, then I’m totally at ease.” I was constantly named “Employee of the Year,” with generous bonuses every year.
Later, I started my own business. Within just three months, I had broken into the market and started making money. By the fifth month, I was earning twice my previous salary. Growth was steady month after month. Right when the business needed more hands, I serendipitously met an amazing partner, and the company reached a whole new level.
Really, it seemed like at every step, whatever I needed, a pair of hands would always place it right in front of me, just in time.
My Two Girls: Ellie & Mia
Meet Ellie, My Firstborn
In 2020, my husband and I decided to have a child. After trying for over a year, we finally got the news in 2021 that a little one was on the way. In 2022, we welcomed our first child, Ellie. She made me a mother.
She is utterly adorable—big eyes, rosy skin, chubby little hands. Every time I look at her, I can’t help but give her a kiss. She is pure joy, and I love her more each day.
But as a first-time mom, I faced unprecedented difficulties. The postpartum tearing wouldn’t heal, and the pain was excruciating. Clogged milk ducts made my breasts hard as rocks. The severe sleep deprivation… And what was even more crushing was that, with zero parenting experience, I was clueless when faced with her unexplained wailing, night terrors, refusal to nurse, constipation, diarrhea, fevers… I desperately searched online, longing for one accurate, truly useful answer!
It was during this time that I thought, once I make it through this “dark” path, I must leave a light on for other new moms.
And Then Came Mia
Ellie had just turned one when I got pregnant again. In 2024, we welcomed our second daughter, Mia.
Completely different from Ellie, Mia is a great eater and sleeper. Although she had her fussy moments in the first two months, starting almost from month three, she became super easygoing. She feeds on schedule, gradually sleeps through the night, loves her solid foods, and adapted quickly when I had to stop breastfeeding due to mastitis.
This made me realize just how vastly different babies can be! It made me even more determined to write about my experiences.
Why I Had to Start This Blog
The Catalyst: A Life Pivoted
After Mia was born, my business also began to decline sharply. I had no choice but to close it and become a full-time mom. My work no longer involves Excel and Word, but instead revolves around changing diapers, washing bottles, making baby food, and managing household chores…
This has been a monumental challenge for me. All my past achievements seem irrelevant now. Managing two young children has brought me a sense of frustration I’ve never known before.
The Daily Reality
They are always fighting over things. When one is in my arms, the other immediately demands to be held too. When I try to cook, Ellie wants me to read her a book. When I attempt to load the washing machine, Mia has a diaper blowout, and I must drop everything to change her…
By the time I finish all that, I see the cup of hot coffee on the table has gone cold again. And it’s not until evening that I remember, “Oh my goodness, the clothes are still in the hamper, unwashed!”
Of course, being a mom is filled with happiness, but that doesn’t negate how hard it is.
My Promise to You
Because I’ve walked this path myself, I won’t just tell you how joyful motherhood is, like many websites do. I want to share my real, unfiltered experiences so every new mom can find a “companion” here.
I want to tell you: you are not alone. What you’re going through, I’ve been there too. Your breakdowns, your helplessness, your moments of losing control—I’ve had them all. You don’t need to feel guilty. This is just a small, necessary stretch of the journey for every mom.
My Hope for This Space
I really want to share my parenting experiences—not just the warm, glowing moments, but to honestly document the pitfalls I’ve stumbled into, the tears I’ve shed, and the “survival wisdom” I’ve scraped together in utter exhaustion.
The Goal: A Mom’s Toolkit
I hope this blog becomes a “mom’s toolkit,” filled not with vague theories, but with:
- Practical Tips: Like how to quickly figure out why a baby is crying, tried-and-true methods for dealing with clogged ducts, or how to efficiently manage the daily grind with twins (or two under two) solo.
- Pitfall Avoidance Guides: Sharing the baby products I regret buying the most, and those “game-changer” parenting hacks. Letting you know which parenting anxieties you can let go of, and which principles are worth holding onto.
- A Community for Moms: I hope my stories connect me with more moms like you. We can cheer each other on in the comments, share our own tricks, turning the storms we face alone into a journey we walk together.
The Bigger Vision
My previous career taught me to analyze data, solve problems, and optimize processes. Now, I’m applying all those skills to this new “position” of Mom. I want to prove that a mom’s value is absolutely not confined to the home. The mindset, resilience, and creativity we built in our careers can shine just as brightly—perhaps even brighter—in this more complex, long-term “project” of raising humans, and can even be transformed into a force that helps others.
My hope is simple: that every mom who opens this blog can let out a sigh of relief and say, “So it’s not just me.” Then, she can find a bit of practical info, a dose of comforting solidarity, and return to her sweet, chaotic mom-life with a little more confidence and a little less weight on her shoulders.
This road? Let’s walk it together.
Janimal
member
Re: ***(((((OPINIONS))))*** Some Unpopular and Some NotSoMuch!
I'm kind of sad the NFL lockout is probably coming to an end. It would be nice to not be asked every freaking weekend if its ok to go watch the game with the guys. My husband isn't even freaking American! He should be asking to watch his own football (soccer), I'd be ok with that since most games are international and on early in the morning.
I knew it would come to an end though - no one in their right mind would give up that much money, on the players side and the owners side.
I think the new law in Florida that welfare recipients must undergo drug testing is dumb.
It's a waste of money - it's not that hard to get clean for ONE drug test. This will have no real tax savings, but will cost the state money. They've looked at this before, done a pilot program, and found that the program showed no significant difference in drug use between welfare recipients and the general population. This law perpetuates a myth and stereotype that disadvantaged people are drug abusers. It's wrong - unconstitutional even - to subject these people to the procedure with no cause or suspicion.
I'm already seeing a bunch of stupid FB statuses about how great this law is.
Also, if Mitt Romney (or any other member of Latter Day Saints) gets the GOP nomination, there will be family members of mine who will be torn between voting for the evil Muslim and the cult member Mormon. I kind of want that to happen so I can read the crazy they will write on FB and be grateful they don't live near me. I guess that's notsomuch an opinion, more a random thought.
DMoney will be a kickass big sister
Quote: "If "Kate Plus 8" fails to boost its ratings, Gosselin might have to leave the reality TV realm for a more traditional job." My response: Please do! She's an overexposed selfish AW who has unashamedly exploited her children in the public eye. Her self-absorbed attitude sickens me.
I'm not familiar with the Florida law, but I'm subject to random drug testing to continue to be paid at my job and don't see an issue with welfare recipients having a similar requirement
~Working Mom~Breastfeeding Mom~Cloth Diapering Mom~BLW Mom~
Blog - No Longer on the DL ~ The Man Cave
Shawn and Larissa
LO #1 - Took 2 years and 2 IVFs ~ DX - severe MFI mild PCOS homozygous MTHFR (a1298c)
LO #2 - TTC 7 months, surprise spontaneous BFP!
~Working Mom~Breastfeeding Mom~Cloth Diapering Mom~BLW Mom~
Blog - No Longer on the DL ~ The Man Cave
Shawn and Larissa
LO #1 - Took 2 years and 2 IVFs ~ DX - severe MFI mild PCOS homozygous MTHFR (a1298c)
LO #2 - TTC 7 months, surprise spontaneous BFP!
I really, really wish that there was so app or technology that would disable the ability to text/surf the web if you are behind the wheel.
It's not random testing. So the tests will be planned and prepared for. So it won't actually have any real impact - drug users can be clean for one test. Meth is out of your system in a couple days. It will COST money, and not save money. Fiscally irresponsible with no positive impact.
DMoney will be a kickass big sister
Ok. Agree that it's a waste of money. Disagree that it's unconstitutional or perpetuating a stereotype considering that this type of drug testing is required to begin virtually any job on the planet.
~Working Mom~Breastfeeding Mom~Cloth Diapering Mom~BLW Mom~
Blog - No Longer on the DL ~ The Man Cave
Shawn and Larissa
LO #1 - Took 2 years and 2 IVFs ~ DX - severe MFI mild PCOS homozygous MTHFR (a1298c)
LO #2 - TTC 7 months, surprise spontaneous BFP!
My husband listens to HS on his way home from work and told me that he really liked the Gaga interview too. I normally don't like her music and I know he doesn't either so it surprised me that he mentioned it to me. Must have been a very good interview!
I saw Dance Moms for the first time last night. I found the moms a bit better than the Tiaras moms, at least 2 moms realized the outfits were inappropriate, and 1 mom was upset that her kid wasn't getting enough time to be a kid. I really wanted to smack the dance place owner - Abby. DD is in a ballet class and watching that show made my stomach turn at the idea of being a Dance Mom!
DMoney will be a kickass big sister
This probably makes me a bad to-be mom. And maybe would fit better in tmw's "confessions" thread. But oh well.
I first felt this baby kick me last night. I hadn't felt her move AT ALL until then. I was super excited all last night- I spontaneously started crying when I realized what it was- so freaking cool. But then I had trouble sleeping because I was so focused on her.
And now shes kicking me at work. And its amazing. But I'm distracted. And having a hard time focusing on anything else. Is it going to be like this for the next 4 months? Because its amazing, and cool and she is SO smart for making her presence known (lol, and the my child is brilliant stuff starts!), but its sooo distracting!
Is that a UO? haha
I watched an episode where she was going on about how she has a "career" she loves. My question for her: what is your career?? Self Promoter? Professional Celebrity? Seriously. Do something productive for a change that actually contributes something to society.
The Constitution mandates that searches cannot be conducted without probable cause. Ta-dah. Oh, and the people have to pay for the test upfront, but get reimbursed later as part of their benefits. I bet your employer doesn't do that.
This is conservative political rhetoric that continues to blame the poor for our troubles, that we are doing too much for them.
Drug test the Wall Street bankers who get bailouts and you might get me on board! Speaking of -- who else do we test that gets government funds? College students? Farmers? Company executive officers? Oh, just the poor people, that's ok then.
Cutting funds to people with a substance abuse problem isn't going to do any damn good. How about incentives for drug counselling - doesn't that seem like a better incentive to actually DO something about drugs? And you know what, the people who love this law are the same people who said being required to buy healthcare is a violation of their civil liberties - but somehow it's ok to make poor people pay for and take mandatory drug tests.
Let's face it, the people pushing this kind of crap characterize welfare recipients as dysfunctional black people who are likely criminal and abusing the system. Let's not pretend that this drug testing isn't supporting that stereotype.
DMoney will be a kickass big sister
Agreed!
I watch 16 and pregnant and Teen Mom for the same reason!
Don't worry, you are not alone, and definitely NOT a bad mom-to-be! When the kicks first started, while at first I found it totally amazing, I soon found it distracting and almost annoying, but after the first week you get used to them. Then, when you don't feel a kick for a couple of hours you freak out!
There are a few, and I'm sorry I don't know what they're called but I think one might be free the rest are paid for.
I'd love to agree with your 'All' but I admit I am so excited to see if The Little Couple get a baby either by surrogate or adoption, and I watch MasterChef. So, I'll say 'Most' instead because I have seen some BRUTAL moments as I channel-surfed the new 'wah-wah-boo-hoo' Bachelorette, and that whiny-as-hell redhead on Big Brother.
I hate the abbreviation DH (Dear/Darling Husband). I think it sounds either
A) Condescending when thrown in to cushion a complaint or gripe, or
I'm addicted to teen mom and 16 and pregnant. DH and I like to watch them so we can judge others from the safety of our sofa. Is it bad that our relationship is founded on a mutual love of making fun of people?
TTC #2 since 1/1/13
Agreed. I also don't like the word husband in general. It's so formal. I use hubs or hubby when speaking of him, but I really don't like any of them. It still weirds me out that I have the title of wife and I never like girlfriend. Maybe I just don't do well with labels in general. I do, however, love the word lover. It just tickles me.
Lover!!...lol that reminds me of that SNL skit with the two professors. I like babydaddy and I usually say it real fast with my head moving side to side.
actually, the last 3-4 jobs i've had i DID have to do that. i paid for the test and after i was hired, they reimbursed me.
and honestly, drug tests for college students isn't a half-bad idea.
I can only speak for myself, but if I fell on hard times and someone/ some entity was willing to help me out, I would be more than willing to take a drug test for it.
A Little Bird and a Monkey Butt
I'm not ok with ouur government sending the message "if you are poor, you are probably on drugs." I hope to hell I can teach my kids better than that.
This law will NOT have a positive impact. It sounds nice to the conservatives pushing their political rhetoric that blames the poor for our problems. Damn social programs! But does absolutely NOTHING useful to actually affect the issues of illegal drug use. It's a "surface" law that will cut aid to people who will not be incentivized at all to change the cycle. It will cost the state money. And promotes the myth that poor people are all on drugs.
DMoney will be a kickass big sister
I wish I had the option of being a stay-at-home mom. I probably wouldn't choose to be, but just having the option would be nice. We could probably make do on my husband's salary if we wanted to be a little more thrifty, but we both like the nicer things in life.
*sigh*
It sounds like you have the option!
I have the option also, but it would mean a drastic change in lifestyle we are not willing to make. That's the dealio for mos of us, right? If a family gives up an income, they have to change their lifestyle.
I wouldn't complain about not having the option because you want nice things. Some peopel don't have the option because they absolutely don't have the option if they want to do things like, you know, eat and stuff.
DMoney will be a kickass big sister
A Little Bird and a Monkey Butt
I LOVE how I can hide status updates and wall posts from certain family on Facebook who say stupid crap and spend all day feeding zoo animals and building imaginary farms.That way I don't have to block them entirely and cause a 'family crisis'.
My best friend calls her husband her lover in this ridiculous tone of voice or she calls him Uncle D, but she never refers to him as her husband. I love babydaddy and forgot all about that! I could handle that especially as I can't wear my rings anymore and he wears his every day...he could be my babydaddy and Bean and I are his dirty secrets! So shameful
Yes. I typed annoying a few times and then deleted it because I thought I would get flamed. And I felt bad for saying it. But its hard to have a conversation with my DEAN and feel this random punch in the gut and be able to keep my train of thought. haha
I am so excited the NFL lockout is ending! I love football so much. I am actually thinking about taking my daughter home in a Bears football jersey for her first outfit, that's how crazy I am! My fall/winter would be depressing if I didn't have NFL Sundays to get me through.
I am so excited the NFL lockout is ending! I love football so much. I am actually thinking about taking my daughter home in a Bears football jersey for her first outfit, that's how crazy I am! My fall/winter would be depressing if I didn't have NFL Sundays to get me through.