Trouble TTC

Poll: IF Comments

So we all hear the dreaded IF comments from people who just don't get it.  What comments have you been told lately?
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Re: Poll: IF Comments

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  • "Relax, and it'll happen."

    I think I don't get too many stupid comments because my people know I will let them HAVE it.  Big Smile

    My feet and Miss Heidi the rescue mutt!

    image

    15 treatment cycles: four early m/c
    Moving forward with domestic infant adoption!

    Home study approved 5/13, now just waiting...

  • Just stop trying so hard.  Go on vacation.  Adopt.
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  • "All of this frustration will be worth it in the end."

    To put that in context, that was right after I told her this cycle was a bust.  Good thing it wasn't in person my face would have given me away

    No Sh*t!

    Gus Gus
    Born: August 27th, 2012
    8lbs. 15oz. 20" @ 7:07pm
    August 2012 July Siggy: Pool Baby
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  • - From MIL:  "Can you handle that?" (in a not so friendly tone)  Regarding injects if these 3 IUI cycles don't work.

    - Comments from my best friend regarding IUI: "So you are automatically pregnant now right?"  "If the success rates aren't high, why not use a turkey baster and save your money?"  "My husband still says he's willing to give you his sperm.  We make cute babies." 

    - From the dentist: While talking about infertility after I had to tell her the new meds I am on.  "Well my diagnosis is that you are not ovulating because it takes awhile after coming off the pill."  I didn't even go into all the charting, OPKs, testing, etc I've done that shows I AM ovulating.

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  • It'll happen

    Are you sure you want this?  (as their children are acting up)

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  • "No wonder you aren't pregnant yet, you are so stressed out!"

    From my friend with 4 kids. 

    TTC since 3/2010 Off BCP 2008 B/W = Good
    HSG 6/24/2011 = Clear S/A = Decrease in Morph due to meds
    First RE appt = 8/24/2011 Lap on 9/16/2011
    Dx = Endo and possible blocked tube
    Natural Cycle due to Cyst
    S/PAIF Welcome!
    My (non 3t!) Blog
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    image
  • "Babysit my kids and you'll stop trying so hard for one of your own."
    ________________________________________________________________________
    imageimageimage
  • When I told  friend we had to take a break to work on issues, I got "see, you're going to get pregnant now because you're not trying." Um, no. For one, that's not at all our motive, and as low as DH's counts are, highly unlikely. Two, if I got pregnant, I'd be terrified of miscarriage in an unmedicted (for P4) cycle. I know they'd give me supps if I got a BFP, but if conception occured, I may not even know it if my LP is too short. That's all far too much to explain, though, so I just smile and nod.
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    P/SAIF Welcome
    Invisible Finish Line
    3T's Traveling Ovary Blog
    7DPO Progesterone: low. CD3 BW: normal, HSG: clear
    DX: severe MFI (low all 3) and low T. Undergoing replacement therapy.
  • "I totally understand, I had a cyst when I was 13 and thought I'd never have kids."

    "That's great, but did I tell you I'm pregnant?" 

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  • Oh, and my sister, who I know is just trying to be helpful, told me to just take Clomid, because it worked for her husband's cousin. Sure, I'll "just take" Clomid. I really hate that people seriously think it's some simple wonder-drug.
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    P/SAIF Welcome
    Invisible Finish Line
    3T's Traveling Ovary Blog
    7DPO Progesterone: low. CD3 BW: normal, HSG: clear
    DX: severe MFI (low all 3) and low T. Undergoing replacement therapy.
  • imagemwlove:

    - From MIL:  "Can you handle that?" (in a not so friendly tone)  Regarding injects if these 3 IUI cycles don't work.

    - Comments from my best friend regarding IUI: "So you are automatically pregnant now right?"  "If the success rates aren't high, why not use a turkey baster and save your money?"  "My husband still says he's willing to give you his sperm.  We make cute babies." 

    - From the dentist: While talking about infertility after I had to tell her the new meds I am on.  "Well my diagnosis is that you are not ovulating because it takes awhile after coming off the pill."  I didn't even go into all the charting, OPKs, testing, etc I've done that shows I AM ovulating.

    Are you kidding me on your best friend?!? Wow that would really piss me off 

  • imagemwlove:

    - Comments from my best friend regarding IUI:  "My husband still says he's willing to give you his sperm.  We make cute babies." 

    This is the crappiest thing anyone has ever said.  Wow. 

    My feet and Miss Heidi the rescue mutt!

    image

    15 treatment cycles: four early m/c
    Moving forward with domestic infant adoption!

    Home study approved 5/13, now just waiting...

  • ccamccam member

    We just recently told our IL's about everything going on and our upcoming IUI.  We asked my MIL (who has a huge mouth!) not to tell anyone.  She ended up telling my SIL (I was pissed - but that's a whole other story).  We planned on telling her anyway, but in person, since she went through treatments as well and had her two kids through IVF.

    Anyway... I get a text from my SIL saying, "I heard the good news and I'm so happy for you guys"..... first of all, why would you talk to me about this through a text and second, why is infertility "good" and something to be happy about?!  Maybe it's not that big of a deal and I know she really does mean well, but come on!  Especially coming from someone who went through this all.

    ___________________________________________________________________________

    Trying for #1 since May 2010   l   DX ~ Unexplained Infertility June 2011

    IUI #1&2 = BFN; IUI #3 = BFP, m/c @ 6 weeks

    November '11 ~ IVF#1 ~ ER 11/18 (29R, 17F) ~ 5dt of one beautiful blast on 11/23 = BFP!!

    Beta #1 9dp5dt = 116, P4 = 28 ~ Beta #2 13dp5dt = 700 ~ Beta #3 20dp5dt = 9500, P4 = 26

    1st u/s 12/27 - hb of 156!! EDD 8.10.12 :)   **TEAM GREEN!**

    Sweet baby boy born 8.18.12

    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker

    Trying for #2

    FET #1 - October '13 - c/p   l   FET #2 - December '13 - cancelled :(   l   FET #2.2 - 1.30.14 - BFN

    ~ More testing - hysteroscopy, endometrial biopsy & more b/w - all normal / negative~

    Surprise BFP while waiting on FET #3 ~ beta #1 500; beta #2 1600; first u/s 4/3 - measuring 5w5d, no hb yet!; 2nd u/s 4/10 - hb 132, measuring 6w6d - EDD 11.29.14 :)    **TEAM GREEN!**

    Beautiful baby girl born 11.24.14

      Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker

  • From my OB (a split second before I decided to ditch her for an RE): "well, I can send you for some tests - that will guarantee you get pregnant!" 

    From everyone else: "My cousin's half-sister's mother-in-law's manicurist tried for years, and as soon as they adopted, BOOM! She got pregnant."

    [sigh]

    Image and video hosting by TinyPic Image and video hosting by TinyPic
    TTC Since April 2010
    Dx: Hypothyroid, High FSH, Low progesterone, Blocked left tube
    BFP 5-2-11; m/c 5-9-11
    July 2011: 50 mg Clomid + Ovidrel + IUI #1 (7/13) + Progesterone = BFP!!
    EDD: 4/04/12
    BabyFruit Ticker
  • "It will happen when it's supposed to happen"


    TTC since April 2009 ~ Unexplained IF 3 IUI's later....EDD 6.28.12 BabyFruit Ticker
  • It will happen.

    Many couples choose not to have children and are fine.

    I can be your surrogate if  you want.

    Stop obsessing.

    Well, you are still young, you have plenty of time.

     

    TTC #1 Since December 2009
    BFP #1 05/16/10 EDD 01/13/11 natural m/c 11w1d (unknown cause)
    BFP #2 03/24/11 EDD 12/06/11 missed m/c D&C 10w (Triploidy xxx)
    BFP #3 12/24/11 EDD 09/02/12 missed m/c D&C 10w4d (Triploidy xxx)
    BFP #4 02/10/14 EDD 10/19/14  - Baby boy made his arrival 10/02/14
    !
    BFP #5 05/08/15 EDD 01/19/16 C/P 05/14/15
    BFP #6 06/05/15 EDD 02/18/16 *It's a GIRL!!*

    BabyFetus Ticker

    My Blog     My Chart
  • imagerlcassell1:

    "I totally understand, I had a cyst when I was 13 and thought I'd never have kids."

    "That's great, but did I tell you I'm pregnant?" 

    Wow. Really? WTF is wrong with people?!

    TTC #1 Since December 2009
    BFP #1 05/16/10 EDD 01/13/11 natural m/c 11w1d (unknown cause)
    BFP #2 03/24/11 EDD 12/06/11 missed m/c D&C 10w (Triploidy xxx)
    BFP #3 12/24/11 EDD 09/02/12 missed m/c D&C 10w4d (Triploidy xxx)
    BFP #4 02/10/14 EDD 10/19/14  - Baby boy made his arrival 10/02/14
    !
    BFP #5 05/08/15 EDD 01/19/16 C/P 05/14/15
    BFP #6 06/05/15 EDD 02/18/16 *It's a GIRL!!*

    BabyFetus Ticker

    My Blog     My Chart
  • imageccam:

    We just recently told our IL's about everything going on and our upcoming IUI.  We asked my MIL (who has a huge mouth!) not to tell anyone.  She ended up telling my SIL (I was pissed - but that's a whole other story).  We planned on telling her anyway, but in person, since she went through treatments as well and had her two kids through IVF.

    Anyway... I get a text from my SIL saying, "I heard the good news and I'm so happy for you guys"..... first of all, why would you talk to me about this through a text and second, why is infertility "good" and something to be happy about?!  Maybe it's not that big of a deal and I know she really does mean well, but come on!  Especially coming from someone who went through this all.

    If your MIL is anywhere near as crazy as mine, she probably told your SIL that you are KU already instead of that you are going for an IUI.   

  • My least favorite is the "just adopt, then you'll get pregnant" comment. It is wrong on so many levels...
    imageimageimageDaisypath Anniversary tickers Lilypie First Birthday tickers November 2011: after nearly two years of infertility, we are moving on to domestic infant adoption. February 2012: Matched! May 2012: Placed with our son!
  • imagewillamina28:
    imagerlcassell1:

    "I totally understand, I had a cyst when I was 13 and thought I'd never have kids."

    "That's great, but did I tell you I'm pregnant?" 

    Wow. Really? WTF is wrong with people?!

    Yup, it was my cousin too.  She couldn't quite grasp why I burst into tears and ran from the room and why my mom wasn't all over her in excitement over the pregnancy.   

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  • imagerlcassell1:
    imagewillamina28:
    imagerlcassell1:

    "I totally understand, I had a cyst when I was 13 and thought I'd never have kids."

    "That's great, but did I tell you I'm pregnant?" 

    Wow. Really? WTF is wrong with people?!

    Yup, it was my cousin too.  She couldn't quite grasp why I burst into tears and ran from the room and why my mom wasn't all over her in excitement over the pregnancy.   

    OMG what an idiot! I'm sorry :(

    TTC #1 Since December 2009
    BFP #1 05/16/10 EDD 01/13/11 natural m/c 11w1d (unknown cause)
    BFP #2 03/24/11 EDD 12/06/11 missed m/c D&C 10w (Triploidy xxx)
    BFP #3 12/24/11 EDD 09/02/12 missed m/c D&C 10w4d (Triploidy xxx)
    BFP #4 02/10/14 EDD 10/19/14  - Baby boy made his arrival 10/02/14
    !
    BFP #5 05/08/15 EDD 01/19/16 C/P 05/14/15
    BFP #6 06/05/15 EDD 02/18/16 *It's a GIRL!!*

    BabyFetus Ticker

    My Blog     My Chart
  • imagepulga131:
    imagemwlove:

    - From MIL:  "Can you handle that?" (in a not so friendly tone)  Regarding injects if these 3 IUI cycles don't work.

    - Comments from my best friend regarding IUI: "So you are automatically pregnant now right?"  "If the success rates aren't high, why not use a turkey baster and save your money?"  "My husband still says he's willing to give you his sperm.  We make cute babies." 

    - From the dentist: While talking about infertility after I had to tell her the new meds I am on.  "Well my diagnosis is that you are not ovulating because it takes awhile after coming off the pill."  I didn't even go into all the charting, OPKs, testing, etc I've done that shows I AM ovulating.

    Are you kidding me on your best friend?!? Wow that would really piss me off 

     

    Nope...let's just say our conversations have been limited here lately.  I've pretty much had to either be firm with her or just ignore her calls/texts.

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  • imageTrish11278:

    It'll happen

    Are you sure you want this?  (as their children are acting up)

    This is the worst!  My sister asks me that all the time.  One day I am going to snap!

    image


    MFI, Lap on 7/21/11 - Stage III/IV Endo and Polyps removed by D&C
    IVF #1 with ICSI - ER 1/20 (16R, 12M, 10F), ET 1/23 (1-10 cell and 1-8cell transferred), BFP on 1/31 Beta #1 on 2/3 = 68, Beta #2 on 2/6 = 261 EDD 10/12/12  
    Baby girl born 9/22/12

    FET #1 - 9/16/13 - BFN

    IVF #2 - ER 11/11/13 (24R, 18M, 16F), ET 11/16 (2 Grade A blasts)
    BFP on 11/23 Beta #1 = 76 EDD 8/2/14


  • imagerlcassell1:

    "I totally understand, I had a cyst when I was 13 and thought I'd never have kids."

    "That's great, but did I tell you I'm pregnant?" 

     OMG!  That is horrible.  I'm so sorry you had to deal with that.

     

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  • imageginabina11:

    "I would just DIE if I knew I could never have kids without medical intervention!  How in the world do you cope with that?!"  

     

    Obviously by confiding in wonderful people like you, jack@ass! 

    That person = idiot. Your response = hilarious!
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  • when are you going to give your son a playmate

    did you put your legs up after sex?

    make sure you are doing it missionary...thats the best for getting pregnant

    ~after 34 cycles we finally got our 2nd little bundle of joy~
    My IF blog
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    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker

    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker

     

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  • From my dad when I tearfully told my parent's that we have been trying for a year and a half... "You guys are having sex, aren't you? Do you know how it works?"

     

    Um, a little late for the birds and the bees talk, daddy-o. 

     

    But my dad has been really very supportive, it was just this first comment that made me look at him like he was a loon. 

  • imagePlumCallaLily:

    "It will happen when it's supposed to happen"


     

    This. Times one million! 

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  • My least favorite is "relax it will happen." or  "you're still young you have plenty of time."

    image
    image
    image
    Anniversary


    Infertility blog


    Trying for a baby since 4/10

    DX: Infertile 6/11 Me: LPD, all other blood work clear.
    DH: low sperm motility,low count.
    Met with RE start clomid + TI + IUI 5/12= IUI cancelled due to positive Cystic Fibrosis carrier test. DH tested Neg. for Cystic Fibrosis,

    6/12 Clomid + TI +IUI=BFN 8/10 IVF consult.
    IVF #1 Started BCP 9/2 Lupron 10/11 stims 10/27 ER 11/6!! 5 eggs retreived only 1 mature. FERT report shows none made it.Cancelled cycle.

    IVF #2 BCP 11/18 Lupron 12/14

    Stims start 12/29 ER 1/8 ET 1/11 put in 1 grade B and 1 grade C. Beta: 1/20 = BFN

    IVF# 3 7/13 BFP ended in chemical pregnancy

    9/15 diagnosed with PCOS and insulin resistance gearing up for IVF# 4 Dec/ Jan

    Everyone Welcome!
  • From MIL after telling her that we are MFI:

    "I think the problem is that you drink too much coffee S, and the acid in it are killing his sperm."

     


    "I prayed for this child and the Lord has granted what I asked of him." ~1 Samuel 1:27
    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
    "Whatever it takes, we walk together." ~Pittsburgh Penguins
    My IF-turned-baby blog
  • imagemwlove:

    - From MIL:  "Can you handle that?" (in a not so friendly tone)  Regarding injects if these 3 IUI cycles don't work.

    - Comments from my best friend regarding IUI: "So you are automatically pregnant now right?"  "If the success rates aren't high, why not use a turkey baster and save your money?"  "My husband still says he's willing to give you his sperm.  We make cute babies." 

    - From the dentist: While talking about infertility after I had to tell her the new meds I am on.  "Well my diagnosis is that you are not ovulating because it takes awhile after coming off the pill."  I didn't even go into all the charting, OPKs, testing, etc I've done that shows I AM ovulating.

    My friend at work has asked me this every single month - she somehow still does not get.  I don't understand how a 45yo woman with 2 kids does not know simple female reproductive biology - the sperm has to fertilize the egg and then it needs to implant.  She still thinks IUI or IVF = immediate pregnancy.  ugh.

     TTC #1 since 6/09
    Dx: PCOS and MFI
    3 IUIs, 4 IVFs = BFFN
      3rd RE: IVF #5/FET = BFP
    14dp5dt=1170 16dp5dt=2573

    1st u/s=
    TWINS!
    It's a Boy and a Girl!

    Born at 34w3d! 
     

  • imageobeach8:
    imagePlumCallaLily:

    "It will happen when it's supposed to happen"


     

    This. Times one million! 

    I agree this really gets me...
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  • After I told my sister that my DH has low sperm count, she started talking about a mutual friend of ours and her H (we'll call him Jake) who has also has a low sperm count who are also having trouble. My sister doesn't like Jake and said, "Giving Jake a low sperm count is God's way of telling him he shouldn't have kids."

    Way to go sis...way to go...

    I wasn't too surprised...my sister is an a$$hole sometimes.

    TTC 12/2009
    Me: 32 - Stage II Endo / DH: 36 - Low count and morphology (1%)
    IUIs 1-3 BFN, lap Dec. 2010, IUIs 4-6 BFN
    IVF w/ICSI #1 - ER 2/8: 24R 19M 9F ET 2/13 2-5 day blasts (no frosties) = BFP - b/g twins!
    E & C Born 10/19/2012
    Lilypie First Birthday tickers
  • imagesbrowns08:

    From MIL after telling her that we are MFI:

    "I think the problem is that you drink too much coffee S, and the acid in it are killing his sperm."

     

    OMG! Don't you just hate MIL's? Sounds like something mine would say! 

  • " you are too stressed". "just get drunk". "stop thinking about and it will happen". "stop believing that temperature stuff". From my SIL "we just got drunk and he forgot to pull out, so just do thst". "your still young". "it is summer, so enjoy it"
    Pregnancy Ticker
  • "Stop stressing about it, and it'll happen." - I get some variation of this from almost everyone.

     

    "Well, you need to understand that some people just can't have children.'

    and

    "Spend a day with my kids and you won't want children." - Both of those from my friend. 

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  • imagemisstrish521:

    "Stop stressing about it, and it'll happen." - I get some variation of this from almost everyone.

     

    "Well, you need to understand that some people just can't have children.'

    and

    "Spend a day with my kids and you won't want children." - Both of those from my friend. 

    No, no you don't need to understand that some people just can't have children! What an awful thing to say! Wow 

  • imagepulga131:
    imagemisstrish521:

    "Stop stressing about it, and it'll happen." - I get some variation of this from almost everyone.

     

    "Well, you need to understand that some people just can't have children.'

    and

    "Spend a day with my kids and you won't want children." - Both of those from my friend. 

    No, no you don't need to understand that some people just can't have children! What an awful thing to say! Wow 

    Yeah, that one was definitely the worst. 

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  • I am somewhat active in some organizations - I teach CCD once a week during the year and I got to women's club meeting once a month.  A co-worker once said (and we are friends):  "maybe God thinks you are too busy to have a baby, maybe you should be less busy."   Umm - okay.  I guess I should just sit at home, twiddle my thumbs and do nothing in the meantime then.  And for the past 2 years!!

    Same co-worker also said that it was really hard while she was trying for her 2nd child (guess she was trying to by sympathetic) and she got to the point that if it didn't happen the next month she was going to assume it wasn't meant to be.  She got pregnant after 4 months of trying.  Seriously.  4 months!!!  With her first child they got pregnant the first month.  Grr..... 

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