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2nd Trimester
Sheazier
member
Hate being pregnant - second trimester is not easier for all.
Sheazier
member
I am having a horrible pregnancy and I honestly do not understand why women decide to do this more than once. Maybe it's like camping - after a few years, you forget how horrible it was and agree to do it again. Or maybe there are some women who have glorious pregnancies and experience no pain. I do not know, but I would venture a guess that the survival of the species depends on them.
I have dinner with a friend of mine once a week. She orders a bottle of full-bodied red and tells me how wonderful it is to be pregnant as she eats her rare steak topped with soft cheeses. Yes, being pregnant is great. Refill? Sure I'll take another glass of milk - on the rocks.
5.5 more months of being treated as "special" and "delicate" at work. Better not give me top billing for that case since I am so emotional right now. What pregnant woman needs to make partner anyway?
Tonight I'll be going to an amusement park with my loving husband and our nieces and nephews. I am sure I will have a wonderful time enjoying everyone else having a good time on the rides. I better not play that carnival game, though. I might accidentally hurt myself or worse - it might hurt the baby.
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Re: Hate being pregnant - second trimester is not easier for all.
FFS, suck it up buttercup.
I can totally understand where you are coming from. The constant nausea, aches, pains and all the bull. My husband always telling me to take it easy when there are things to be done. Please don't get me wrong, he is a darling for caring, but if I don't do this stuff, it will never get done. I always have to say that I'm pregnant, not dying.
I do have other kids and I can assure you that as rough as it may seem, there is a light at the end of the tunnel. Your baby. And it truly is worth it.
Hang in there!
This!
Thank you. I think OP should stop procreating since once she has the baby, all she'll do is whine that the baby gets to sleep all day, and she doesn't. Or, that the baby doesn't have to go to work, and she does. GROW UP.
Huh. I assumed that you were still having morning sickness or cramping or bleeding or something that would warrant such a rant. No? No. Just missing your wine and amusement park rides.
I'm not loving the second tri either, but its because I still throw up on a daily basis, I'm always constipated, exhausted, gassy, crampy, and generally just feel like crap. I can live for 9 months without a glass of wine or brie. I also know that this is temporary - soon I'll feel better with the benefit of having a baby in my arms.
Excuse me as I put on my *** hat.
STFU and get over yourself!
Yes, pregnancy can feel horrible and yes, it can severely impact your career. I'm very well aware of these things. I work in an industry that is 80/20 male to female and I am VERY aware that this is changing the way I'm perceived. Because of that, I work my pregnant tush off to counter balance that and to demonstrate that I am as viable in my position as always.
Perhaps people at your work think you're overly emotional and can't handle being lead because you spend so much time bitching about all the things you hate about pregnancy.
Suck it up and put your big girl panties on.
At the end of the day, even if you didn't plan to get pregnant; you had the option to abort and you didn't. It is 100% your choice to be in this situation and if you're having a hard time; go home and have a good cry. Just like you have control of your choices and chose pregnancy, you have control of your life through this pregnancy and beyond. Work during your maternity leave if you're worried about losing your place in your given industry. Hell, the last woman at my company to have a baby was in labor at work for four hours before she called her husband to drive her to the hospital.You do what you have to do, whining about it is going to get you nothing but annoyance from others.
Ask your doctor, but many don't mind you having a sip of wine here or there in second tri due to the antioxidants and other benefits, as well as a glass about once a week in the third tri. You don't drink to get drunk do you? It's for the flavour? Then go ahead and have a sip.
As for the cheese, is it unpasturized? You can eat soft cheeses, just not unpasturized ones. And so your steak has to be a little more cooked, I bet it's still delicious, right?
I wish I could afford to go out to weekly steak dinners with a child on the way.
It's only 9 months, and you get the reward of a beautiful child in the end. 9 months out of how many years you will be alive, that's not even a full year out of your life.
I hated being pregnant the first time. I was absolutely miserable. I kept telling DH that this kid was going to make me or break me. I hated my body, and continued hating my body long after my Little Pumpkin Butt was born. I hated how I felt. I hated being treated "different", and then in other cases I hated that I wasn't be treated with any respect because I looked so young. I hated being sick. I hated being tired. I hated the pains.
But... I'd feel her kick. I'd feel her move. And that made all the horrible stuff just fade away. 18 months later, I am pregnant again. Still hating the pregnancy part, but when I look at my daughter - even when she's having a tantrum or driving me out of my mind - she reminds me why all this is worth it and why it is necessary for me to stop being selfish for 9 months.
My advice to you is this: no matter the circumstances, you're pregnant. It may not be the right time for you. You have to remember, that child did not ask to be born. That child did not ask to be in your belly. All you can do at this point, is find the positives. Find time to make yourself feel important and good about what you're doing. And do the best you can for that baby because it's not about you or what you want anymore.
Honestly, I'm not really enjoying pregnancy either. I'm too young to be drinking - just turned twenty - but was really looking forward to spending this summer at the water park and getting a tattoo for my just-passed birthday. It was a totally unplanned pregnancy, and we found out I was pregnant just after three months of dating - we've now been dating for eight months, and over five of those I've been pregnant and emotional. It's put a lot of stress on our relationship and we've had to grow up before we were ready. I've managed the transition faster than him, and he's starting to catch up as I start to get bigger and it starts to get hotter.
I'm in pain about seventy five percent of the time, and the times I'm not in pain, I'm exhausted and have severe heartburn. Sex - even with lube - chaffs me, and so although I want it, I do not partake of it.
The boyfriend and I both work at Papa Johns, he a driver and me an "insider," though he's more actively trying to get another job. Thankfully, some of the less than desirable employees were fired and I went from going 9 hours a week to 20+ hours a week. The increased checks are great, considering I can now afford a crib and a pack n play, as well as the crib bedding when it comes down to it. Less than thankfully, the increased hours of standing on my feet, dealing with beyond irritating ghetto customers that speak ebonics I can barely understand, slapping and docking dough (which is a lot of back/shoulder/hip motion) and running around on slippery, flour-covered floors during the dinner rush is almost more than I can take. I do it without complaint, though - we are severely understaffed, and it's my job. Nevertheless, I have bruises on the bottom of my feet, and when I get home from my shifts I can barely walk because of the pain in my back.
I usually whine and moan only to my boyfriend: "Why do people want to be pregnant?" Depsite that, and all the above, I have to say I'm looking forward to the end event. While I'm not glad that I am pregnant now, because our situation is less than ideal, I am happy that I have a chance to have a beautiful son with a man that I grow to love more each day. I try to look past all the bad things and focus on the good things: the kick I just felt, the baby registry being done, the delicious grilled chicken I'm going to have for dinner, the eating healthier getting me into better shape, and the occasional Starbucks I treat myself to tasting SO much better for not having it in a few weeks. It's what I tell the BF all the time: try not to focus on the negative things and focus on the positives. It makes everything a little easier - and my mood much better.
To those that think she's being a "whiny brat", she's perfectly entitled to have her complaints. I'm sure that at least once during your pregnancy, you will have already missed or will miss something that you cannot have. It could be wine, soft cheese, amusement park rides, et cetera. I'm sure that at least once during your pregnancy, unless you are a complete saint, you have expressed or will express a complaint about how you're feeling, perhaps not to a public forum but at least to your SO/DH/BF or a close friend. I have a really good friend that LOVED being pregnant, but she misses her mimosas so much that she has sworn that she is going to have one as soon as possible after she delivers.
Perhaps these are things you should have thought about before you even got pregnant.......I agree with some of the other posts but you sound whiney. Are you ill and having a rough time or just not liking the fact that there is another human being growing inside of you that is taking away all your fun? This is where I get lost. Does your husband know you feel this because if I were you mine would have smacked me a long time ago!
And also, be greatful if your pregnancy is healthy and all is well, some of us aren't as lucky and wake up every day just praying our LO's will hang on. Hey I miss my summer fun too but just knowing that next summer I will be sharing it with my daughter makes every hospital stay I have already gone through that much more worth it!
Suck it up!!!!
Married October 16th, 2010
TTC #1 since October 2010
1st BFP 1-12-11
MC'd 1-22-11
2nd BFP 2-15-11
Our Wee One....**KENNEDY JO** born 10/3/11@ 36weeks via Csection
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Labor Buddy to **MRS.ATCH** Welcome Quinn 11-5-11**
This! Do you know what's in your near future? Save the complaining for when the baby wakes you up every two hours screaming at night or has colic and screams for hours. It doesn't sound like you have any pregnancy complications so you should be thankful and grateful.
This, exactly. Pregnancy is 100% preventable. Of course you have a right to complain, but we also have a right to perceive you as a whiney brat.
Obviously there are things that I miss and I don't like about being pregnant, but considering the journey to get here (and mine was relatively mild compared to many of my friends) I wake up every morning grateful that I am still pregnant and loving my baby.
Of course I complain, but it is not about selfish reasons to that extent! She didn't say, "oh I miss this or I miss that" she said "I hate pregnancy" there is a big difference there! She has a right to her complaints and I have a right to judge her opinion.
See, your complaint seems valid to me. Working on your feet all day is hard, and having to do it while pregnant is even harder. Her complaint DOES make her sound like a whiny brat because it's true. She knew she wouldn't be able to do those things if she got pregnant, so it's really not a reason to hate being pregnant. If she just got on here and said it sucked because she couldn't have a glass of wine, or it sucked that she had to go to an amusement park with friends, but couldn't ride the rides, then fine. But she absolutely hates being pregnant because of this? Seems silly to me.
Peanut Butter and Jelly!
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I hate to be a debbie downer but your concerns really aren't pg-related. You are going to have to give up a lot of things when baby is here. No rollercoasters if there's no one around to hold the baby. No more dinners with friends and a bottle of wine without a babysitter. It's never going to be about you again.
I am not really a fan of being pg either, I'm sad, I thought I would enjoy it a lot more. Really I would be a lot happier to just have her in my arms already and this stage to be over.
The rest of your post does not justify the title... You hate being pregnant. But your only complaint is that you can't drink wine, and you won't be able to join the amusement park. What are you, 10?
You should be happy and thankful you are having a healthy and normal pregnancy. Some women would kill to be in your shoes right now... hating being pregnant and all...
My little CHD warrior. Born 9/29/11. Got his new heart 10/20/11
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Sure, she has a right to complain, but like another PP said, I have a right to call her an ungrateful b!tch. Sure, I'm one of those annoyingly happy pregnant women who didn't have a lick of morning sickness except for one night of nausea and a recent bout of dizziness yesterday after a shower. But you know what, I'm grateful for every day that my little boy hangs on in my womb. I'm grateful for every day that I wake up to work two full-time jobs on one salary because he's kicking my bladder. I'm grateful for every day that I get dressed and notice that my hips are expanding more, because all of this is for my baby.
I think about my friend Nina who lost two in a row and is on her third pregnancy after her miracle child and how she would want to slap the sh!t out of you for complaining that you can't have wine or soft cheese.
Remember that you are going to sacrifice more when the baby comes. It's only going to get "harder" from here.
ETA: I agree with all the bolded above. Guess what? I have to prove myself even more, even though I got saddled with a second full-time job at work AFTER my bosses found out I was pregnant. Doesn't matter if the guy in the office down the hall has 3/4 of a full-time job. If I don't do my two jobs to the best standard and he works substandard, the spotlight is on ME. So fix your attitude and maybe your outlook will change!
Army Girl, been in since Feb 2003 married to an Army Man, in since 1990.
Color me "so surpised", she sounds like a selfish adolescent child, not a mother.
Being pregnant isn't all fun but it doesn't last forever. Just be happy you are able to get pregnant. I know someone that wants to have a baby so bad, but is having a hard time with getting pregnant. She will probably have to get help to get pregnant and even then they don't always work. I am sure women like her would love to trade you! Children are a blessing!
Posting from an Android sorry for any errors
When I read the title of your post, I actually sighed and thought to myself, "Oh thank goodness I'm not the only one." I've felt like such a terrible person for not enjoying ths more, what with the intense morning sickness, vomiting, weight loss, poor eating habits, bad sciatica, painful braxton-hicks, dizziness, constipation, breakouts that actually feel like painful rashes all over, migraines, and an inability to get a good night's sleep.
Then I read your post and realized your'e just upset that you aren't living the same old life your'e used to and I got really annoyed. Maybe you DO have some of the complaints like I do, and like other PPs have mentioned, but you didn't list any of them except for missing your rare steak and roller coasters. It DOES make you sound a little selfish and whiny.
Some of us really AREN'T loving pregnancy as much as others, but we have a good reason to be miserable right now and are fighting through it for the end result. Hope that puts things in perspective for you.
I agree with everyone that says you're acting like a whiny brat. I am all for complaining if need be, but your complaints are really petty. This pregnancy thing isn't that hard princess- it's not cancer, it's not a debilitating injury that has left you in a wheelchair for the rest of your life. It's temporary and before the end of the year you won't have these "problems" anymore.
Perhaps you should go over the Pregnancy Loss or IF boards and read some of their stories when you are feeling bad for yourself. Or maybe leave your house, go out and talk to people with real problems.
I hope you get to feeling better about your pregnancy soon. I know it can be an adjustment but it really is for a good purpose. I wouldn't say I feel spectacular but I am enjoying my pregnancy despite the back pain, constant bathroom trips and not having an occasional glass of wine. I'm not going to come down on you because you've had plenty of people on this board do that already. All I can say is that if you feel this way to the extreme it seems, you may need to talk to your doctor. Would hate for your to have depression issues once your LO gets here. Try not to think of it as people treating you like a fragile doll - women are strong, that's why we are privileged to do this. Just because it's hard, doesn't mean it's not worth doing.
Okay, I totally agree with how horride camping is but I cannot agree to it as an analogy to being pregnant. It's a different experience for every women. In my first trimester I was so sick and miserable, unable to sleep, always hungry but then wouldget sick again. Did I mention how sick I was? LOL! Yes, it felt that bad and at that point I would have completely agreed with you.
But since then I hae absolutely LOVED being pregnant. In fact, my husband and I agreed to only have one child but I've already told him we might have to have more just because I love being pregnant. He just rolls his eyes at me. Hahaha! Maybe I will just be a serogate because I don't think I'll want more kids I just want to be pregnant.
I'm sorry you are having a difficult time adjusting to your new life style.
Ps-- I totally rode the swings with my nieces at the amusment park a couple of weeks ago, so it's not a total loss! Oh and I had an excuse to spoil them (and myself) with un-necessary ice cream cones, funnel cake and whatever other sweets filled the air! It was the best time I've ever had at Busch Gardens.
It sounds like you have a lot of growing up to do, and fast. Pregnancy isn't EASY... it's something that must be done. So sorry you can't have a bottle of wine and a rare steak at your weekly fancy dinners... must be a terrible life!
But really, I hope your entire post was just sarcasm, because otherwise I am scared for your child. What about when the baby is here? Will you complain because the baby isn't convenient for you? What about when it gets a cold/illness and you can't go to work as planned?
Big girl panties, now. Move on, grow up.
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this is horrible advice. The loss and IF boards are not here to be your zoo so you can go watch their grief and make yourself feel better about yourself.
Oh wow. Some of you ladies need to calm down. She is ALLOWED to whine. And us being pregnant as well are ALLOWED to show some sympathy. A woman is ALLOWED to hate being pregnant and is certainly allowed to *** to a group of women who should be able to understand how she is feeling even if they don't feel the same way. I don't like being pregnant much myself and I ABSOLUTELY miss my wine! Sure I will have a few sips but I know what you mean,its not the same. And just because you hate your pregnancy (even a normal,healthy one) doesn't mean you didn't want to be pregnant or have a baby. Geeze. Talk about unsupportive. If we can't talk about how we feel here honestly, where can we? You guys are being mean.
Sheazier, You can *** all you want and I will do the same.
I'm hoping you meant this sarcastically, maybe you're having a bad day and should have thought before you posted??
Honestly, I miss wine too, I'll still eat medium steak (no rare for me) and carnival rides make me sick, so I don't feel too deprived.
I know it's annoying to hear, but this is just the beginning of sacrifices you'll make for baby. Once she/he is born it will be "well how fun is parenting, I can't go on vacation without this whiny kid crappy her pants every 2 hours and suckling on my nip when I want to lay on the beach. No margaritas for me because I'm breastfeeding!". Or "gee I guess I'll spend my entire paycheck on summer camp, new school clothes, toys and birthday parties. So much for getting a pedicure... "
That's parenthood. I think pregnancy is a good prelude to the real thing, you get a tiny tip of the sacrifice iceberg.
Good luck w/ the rest of your pregnancy.
This, obviously. You get the most amazing reward at the end.
You don't have to love being pregnant, that's fine, but I agree with PP, this post will offend some.