Am I doing the right thing?

PoundCake · June 2011

I have my CO. I have sole physical and legal custody and he sees the kids supervised when its ok with me. He tested positive for coke and never got his psych eval.

He's abusive on the phone as of last week and blames me for him not seeing the kids even though I always say give me a date and time and we can coordinate.

Today he calls and says he had knee surgery and is just getting back on his feet (he lies a ton so I have no idea if its true) but are we busy so we can take the kids to the park. I have school til 2:30 and then work at 3 til 8 so I offered Thursday and Friday afternoon since I know he works Tuesday and Wed nights. He blew up and said no forget it, you do this all the time. I said that he has to stop calling last minute.

And then our grill turned into an argument. I bought it for him for our 5th anniversary 2 years ago. (He bought me nothing lol.) I said he can have it for 50 bucks or I was going to sell it for 50 and give him half. He owes me a lot of money. And he went off on me for being money hungry, not giving him his stuff like his tools. I said that I want the lawyers to do a 50/50 split with joint bills, credit cards. He took his 401K out that he accured during the marriage. So basically I got left with all his bills. I just want what's fair. Nevermind he used my phone number for all his payday loans after we separated.

Am I wrong in what I'm asking for and doing? He's just really on my case and being manipulative and I'm starting to 2nd guess myself.

Unknown · June 2011

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fauxshelley · June 2011

Honestly, I wouldn't talk to him. I would simply email him the dates/times and let him know that he needs to let you know by X date or the visitation will be cancelled due to his lack of response.

I'm assuming you two have a divorce decree that covers seperating property/assets. If he is to pick up something, again send him an email and let him know you will leave it outside on X date and if he doesn't pick it up by X day/time, you will dispose of it.

IMO, there is no reason to try to discuss things with a coke addict who refuses a psych evaluation. GL!

PoundCake · June 2011

We don't have a divorce decree. He filed in April and you have to wait 30 days to even sign papers (in PA). He has stuff on there that's ridiculous.and I'm not signing. I'm barely making it financially and can't get legal aid (tried.) So I'm saving money to get a lawyer to be able to go with a 50/50 split. I'm trying to do some stuff on my own and then have him sign the paper he got 1/2 the money but he's just out there angry. Mostly that I threw him out last April because he wouldn't get help.

He owes me a couple grand and his excuse is I'm money hungry and bitter and to "get over it."

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