Hello! My husband and I just started putting our nursery together today. We put the crib together, and set up the changing tabledresser. I'm wandering if getting the nursery ready. Does it make the waiting harder? Everytime you walk by, is it just a reminder that no baby is in there? Or does it make the wait more exciting knowing that soon there will be a baby in there?
I'm just curious what other adoptive families have done or did while they were waiting to be matched.
Re: Nursery question?
History of IF and 2.5 years TTC. The day we were to start our first IUI we received a call that changed our lives forever and 10 month old Olivia joined our family. Shortly thereafter we got a surprise BFP and baby 2 is due July 5, 2012
This is my feeling too. While it is not 110% done, it could be finished quickly if we were to have a fast placement.
I've seen people reply both ways, so I guess it depends on you, your personality and your situation.
We didn't have a full nursery per se, but we set up DD's crib and changing table in the sitting room right off of our bedroom. Which meant I walked through it to get to my closet or to our bathroom. It never bothered me. It will still somewhat of a sitting area in my mind, and I knew in time it would be a nusery, when it was time for our baby to come to us.
We wanted to be somewhat prepared in case we had a quick match, and we ended up with an emergency placement. We got a call on a Wednesday afternoon that we were chosen by a BM, and we had our daughter in our house by Friday night.
It could go either way.
I will say that having a mostly complete nursery made coming home with an infant much easier. There was no time for that sort of thing for a loooooooong time afterward (of course, she didn't sleep through the night until she was about 18 months old, so I was just a tired mama). I loved being able to sit in the room while we were waiting and imagine and know that someday a baby would fill it.
At the same time, all of our baby boy stuff from our failed placement is horribly painful...BUT that's a rare situation (to have a baby taken back after you have custody) and is totally different than the ache of a wait. I would do it the same all over again and prepare a nursery...even if you keep it gender neutral. We slowly bought the big things over the course of the 8 months we waited for a match and then we had 5 months to personalize it.
You can do anything you want. We had a quick placement (got the call the day after Ben was born and took him home from the hospital the next day). We stayed in a hotel for 10 days before coming home. We didn't have anything except the essentials we got at Walmart on the way out of town. When we got back, we went to BRU and got a crib and changing table ordered. We didn't have a nursery ready until Ben was about 6 weeks old. We didn't do much but put up some wall decorations because we built our house when we got married and it was only 4 years old. Babies don't need much and we got by. I don't think that after going through this that I would do anything different. I still wouldn't want a nursery before we had a baby in our arms.
It depends on the day. We loved starting it and it was really exciting getting to finally buy baby stuff. Some days it makes me hopeful and I like planning stuff I want to do, how I want to decorate, and things I still want to buy. But other days I can't stand to go in there or think about it. Sometimes I go in there and just cry looking at the empty crib.
Sorry I'm not much help, but my emotions fluctuate so much during the this wait that I don't know how I'll feel one minute to the next. But I don't think it makes the waiting harder, I think the waiting is hard no matter what you do. If you have a short wait I'm sure you'll appreciate it being done early. But if you have a longer wait, just know that it may be hard on you sometimes. Unfortunately, it's not something you can predict.
Hey girl! You already know my story but I'm gonna post it anyways.
We started working on our nursery during the homestudy phase. We have not yet genderized it until we get our baby. All we will need to do is get some curtains and some wall decor to go with the gender and we will be set.
Some days I won't go near the room. And then others, I like to go sit in the rocker and just imagine that there will be a baby sleeping in the bed soon.
I think your nursery pictures are way cute. I really like it! Yall did a great job on it.
Talk to ya later girl! Love ya!