Worried about the future.

35baby · May 2011

I am 37 and will turn 38 a month a day before my DD is born. I have so many reservations from going back to work to soon (can't afford not to) to getting my boyfriend excited about her arrival and watching her. It is my first child, but his fourth. I am also nervious about the birth itself. I want to give birth naturally but I hear you never know how that's going to turn out. I also worry that she is small and won't be an exceptable weight at birth cause at 26 weeks I look like I am around 12 weeks. CO-workers don't fail to mention how my small size means I am doing something wrong and harming her. Does anyone else share my fears? Welcome any feedback thanks.

Peppernut · May 2011

One book that really helped me through my first pregnancy was this one:

https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/0738211095/ref=pd_lpo_k2_dp_sr_1?pf_rd_p=486539851&pf_rd_s=lpo-top-stripe-1&pf_rd_t=201&pf_rd_i=B001IWO86Q&pf_rd_m=ATVPDKIKX0DER&pf_rd_r=0GFCNE1MX9NWW1J76SJ1

It addresses a lot of the fears and worries you mention, and has a lot of good information. You also might try cross-posting to Pregnancy after 35, this one's the parenting board.

35baby · May 2011

Thanks I will check the book out. Thought I was going nuts and that my fears were irrational.

NewMrs07 · May 2011

Books will help. Regarding fears about your size, as long as your doctor is not worried, I wouldn't worry either. Some women don't seem too pregnant until their 8th and 9th month. I think you'll see that belly balloon pretty soon. As far as your birth plan, if you want to avoid drugs you should take classes and possibly get a doula. Labor hurts like hell and you should be open to changing your plans if you can't take the pain or something else comes up. Most likely, everything will be OK, so try to relax a little and enjoy your pregnancy

urbanflowerpot · May 2011

People said I looked small, too, but when I went into surprise labor (had no choice but to go natural - it's what I wanted, by chance) I had DS at 3 lbs, 11 oz. He was 17.5 in. That's on the big side - two weeks earlier I'd measured at 50%ile at my u/s.

Pop into the Preemie board if you're ever feeling worried and want to be inspired. There are amazing babies and parents over there

I'd tell you to stop worrying, but I used to worry about worrying, so I know how that is

SFAug07 · May 2011

With Sarah, I was really small until the end and the dr was worried about her size too. I had many non-stress tests and ultrasounds to check her size, as I continued to measure behind and only gained 12 pounds overall (and I am very small to begin with). However, when she was born at exactly 40 weeks, she was 6 lb 11 oz and 21 in, so perfectly healthy size. You can just never tell. I am again very small with this baby but I am not worried now, as it will probably be the same as Sarah. It's just how I carry children, apparently.

35baby · May 2011

thanks for the comforting stories and advice. Not feeling so scared or nervious. What is a non stress test though?

SFAug07 · May 2011

Non-stress tests are done late in third trimester. They hook you up to a monitor to measure baby's heartrate and movements for 30 minutes, to see if it looks normal. They also monitor your contractions - it's interesting although I didn't feel anything, there seem to have been some. I did these twice a week in the last few weeks of my pregnancy because of the concerns about her weight. Sarah was born perfectly healthy and is one of the healthiest kids I know - never sick, not even a cold.

Daisiesinmygarden · May 2011

With my first baby, I was so small that the other women in our birhting class didn't believe I was even pregnant. Then I "popped" at about 8 months and had a 8 pound, 9.5 ounce 22 inch baby. As long as you are taking care of yourself, eating well and your doctor isn't worried, then "looking small" doesn't really mean anything.

RaeAnt · May 2011

I wouldn't worry about you looking small. It's not the size of your baby bump, but the baby inside that matters. As another poster mentioned, they didn't "pop" until late. I was also in my 3rd trimester before it was obvious I was pregnant. That's also when the weight came on. I gained a total of 22 pounds, most of which was the last couple of weeks. some ladies never really show at all. We wonder where the baby hid, but you couldn't tell they were pregnant based on appearance.

As long as the baby is healthy, it doesn't really matter how big your bump is,IMO.

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