We did CIO with DD at 5 months 3 weeks old. She cried on and off for 2 hrs the first night, woke often, and naps were terrible for 2-3 days. The 4th day was great. I considered CIO a success.
We just did CIO last night with DS (5 months 1 week old). He did much better! He did cry for 1 hour, but slept 9pm-3:40am, then ate 8 oz, fell asleep with no crying, and slept from about 4am-(still sleeping at 8:40am).
Yahoo!
ETA: Hopefully it continues to get easier!




Re: That wasn't so bad! (Re: CIO)
We did, while swaddling. But I like to de-swaddle around 5-6 months old, and I do so by CIO.
ETA: We still watch awake times, and put him down awake to sleep, but we are taking away the swaddle.
I think your kid just likes to sleep.
glad it worked for you.
I'd sleep for 6 hours straight after crying for an hour too.. .
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That's what I was thinking. OP, did you ever think that maybe your kids weren't ready if they were crying for one and two hours at a time? I realize your kids aren't allowed to be up for longer then you deem appropriate but, seriously it worked because he exhausted himself.
You're a real headcase, you know?? You put these friggin links in your sig like you're the swaddling/sleep fairy, and when it comes down to it, you can't get your kid to sleep without making the little guy scream his damn head off for an hour and falling asleep from sheer exhaustion.
Maybe if you'd get your head out of your ass and stop "watching his awake times" he'd sleep like a normal baby.
I haven't swaddled Avery in months, and she sleeps through the night. She's never in her life cried for more than 5 minutes, without attention, and that was when I was in the shower and I felt like crap for it.
She often just falls asleep by herself, but if not, we put her in the swing and transfer her after she 's asleep, or heaven forbid... even hold her and give her a bottle.
You are just too lazy to keep your kid occupied nad spend time with him, so you try to keep the poor kid sleeping all damn day instead of reading him a book or playing with him, and then on top of that, you have the nerve to let the poor baby scream himself to sleep.
Go away!
This whole thread just makes me sad.
ETA: Different strokes for different folks, but I find this wrong. It's one thing if you resort to CIO for the baby's best interest because they're 6+ months old, sleeping so poorly that they are unhappy, and other methods have been exhausted. It's quite another to do it just because it's inconvenient for you to comfort your child. Taking away your child's only source of comfort and leaving them alone to cry is heartbreaking.
A 1 year old, 5 month old and trying again?
I'd like to laugh, but I can't. I feel bad for your kids.
Ok, we did CIO but it was out of sheer exhaustion (on both mine and DS's part). He would not just sleep. He was up every hour (if he even made it that long) and I had to pick him up every.single.time and bounce him for 10-15mins just to get him back to sleep. 30-45mins later I was having to do the same thing, and this went on all night long. He wasn't sleeping at night, he wasn't napping, he had circles under his eyes, so we did do CIO (Ferber). But it only lasted 2 nights and he never cried for more than 20mins (with multiple check-ins during that time).
Now, having said that, I would never do CIO just to de-swaddle. I mean if he's sleeping fine with the swaddle, why make him CIO just to get rid of it? Why not try slowly weaning him off of it? If DS ever cried for that long, I would have assumed he just wasn't ready for it yet and sleep training would've stopped right then and there. That's a long time for a LO to cry just to get rid of the swaddle...
This!! 1 hr?!? And you seem so excited by it too. Unbelievable.
I actually feel sick thinking about Liam crying for 5 minutes by himself. We're given this role as parents for a reason, and its not to teach our babies to "man up" and put themselves to sleep. It's to teach love and trust. If they can't find that in their parents from this young of an age, where will they find it?
Not flaming, it just makes me sad to think a baby would cry for that long.
Wow. Just wow. Both of our boys sleep very well and we definitely didn't let them cry for an hour or two! We just follow their lead as to when they are hungry and when they are tired. It's amazing!
Perhaps you should rethink this whole having kids thing if you aren't willing to provide for their needs, whether it be physical or emotional. Kids are inconvenient. Kids take a lot of time and energy. Kids need to be loved and assisted to sleep, they will learn to do it on their own soon enough.
And yeah, what Emjay said times 1000!
The thought of a baby being left to cry for an hour - or two - breaks my heart. I don't think even at 5 months they are ready for that much tough love. Sad.
ETA - my LO doesn't STTN and I'd rather be up at night than have her think I don't care to comfort her. I wouldn't let my 6 year old cry that long. Heck, I even hate crying that long - why on earth would anyone allow an infant to do it???
This! And you thought it wasn't that bad? What do you think IS bad? Ugh. I went to the restroom yesterday for about 2 minutes while LO was in her PnP and started crying bad. I started hurrying while he was getting really upset and by the time I got out of the bathroom he was sound asleep. I felt bad for him crying for 2 minutes and I figured, wow maybe that CIO. I would NEVER let him go longer than 5 minutes, I can't imagine 1-2 hours!!
So what do you do with your kids when they aren't eating, sleeping, or crying in their cribs?
Reading your OP makes me sick. Poor babies. Like the others, I can't stand to let DD cry for more than just a minute or two. She naps well and STTN.
I really have nothing to say to this. Emjay hit it right on the head. Like PP said, if 1-2 hours isn't bad, what is?!
P.S. I haven't swaddled LO since she was 3 weeks old (her choice), and she STTN. Without EVER CIO, by the way. If your LO isn't ready to sleep unswaddled, why do it?
Because according to OP, she "like to de-swaddle around 5-6 months old, and I do so by CIO." B/c SHE likes to de-swaddle... that sounds like an awesome reason. I guess having 2 children makes her the ultimate expert on this topic. Ugh, I'm not one to flame but seriously. Despicable.
I would like to hear from the OP to see if she at least when and comforted in someway during this hour of crying. At least placing her hand on her child. I just want to know b/c right now, I feel sick for this child.
Wrong. Just wrong. You let him cry for an hour and you're ok with it. I can't stand the thought of letting Charlotte cry for more than a minute or two, let alone an hour add to that, the noise would drive me up the damn walls.
Sounds to me like you are just to lazy to get off your ass and go tend to your child. How about you rethink #3.
Yes, of course I comforted him. We did the ferber-style of CIO, and went up every 3-5-8 minutes to comfort him.
I know it seems like no one agrees with what I've done here, but it is what I choose to do. I could try to defend myself more with why I've chosen this particular weekend to do CIO, but that probably would get more darts thrown at me.
My one year old is a completely normal child. She shows no signs of losing trust in me, etc because I made her cry it out at 5.5 months. She falls asleep on her own with no crying, she naps well, she goes to bed easily and sleeps 9pm-9am. To me, whatever I did worked for her, so why not do it again for all future children, including DS right now?
I absolutely know that children take work and time and it puts me at the bottom of my priority list. But I also know I am doing them a favor by teaching them to fall asleep.
Yes, DS cried for an hour and likely only fell asleep due to exhaustion. But when he woke at 4 am for a bottle, he went back to sleep with zero crying. And at his nap today, he talked to himself for a couple minutes and fell asleep again with no crying. I call this a success.
Of course she's proud, her kid slept and that's all she cares about. If her kids don't fit the mold of optimal awake times and sleep schedules she just forces them into it...how charming. I don't know why any would follow her lameass advice. I could go on but, this woman just pisses me off beyond words, she's a condescending asshat who thinks she has all the answers. She stalks boardswaiting for people with sleep and swaddle issues so she can save them with her "see siggy" advice and her "expert" knowledge (even when they don't ask) on what babies are allowed and not allowed to do...cause every kids the same you know.
I went on anyway. Oops.
ME TOO! I'm sorry to be critical but I have 3 boys and although I may not have the best sleepers, they are only little for such a short period of time. If they need to be comforted then so be it! I'm fine with it.
ETA: Of course he went to sleep after crying a full hour:(
Seriously....all ya'll need to cool down. At 5-6 months they are so different from when they are 2-3 months old (most of your little ones). Teaching a child to put themselves to sleep in a reasonable manner is a great thing.
I'm not trying to be a combative, but do you really believe that letting a kid cry for an hour or two is reasonable?
Ferber is useless if you only do it for like 5 minutes.
Wallace & Robins. Thank you.
Yes, teaching a child to sleep is a wonderful thing, but not everyone is going to believe that letting a 5 month old CIO is great. I didn't see anyone say anything about abuse.
I think it really depends on the situation/age/personality of the child. I let my kid put herself to sleep. Sometimes it takes an hour, but she never cries (and thats her personality). So, if she were to start crying for more than a couple of minutes I would go in there to calm her down.
There are kids who are more prone to crying. I would put the limit on 1 hour, but I tend to think that parents have the best interest of the kids at heart. A kid doesn't know what he/she needs, they just know what they want. Of course a kid would rather be playing and being with parents than to be in a bed by themselves. That's our role as parents to teach our kids to sleep and just generally do whats best for them in the long run.
+1. and I read the OP's justification after this but I don't care.
Honestly, I think people are at least partly jumping all over this post because of who the OP is addition to the post itself. Her posts have already gotten to people in the past , hence Emjay's sleep fairy comment.
I agree. I admit I've been annoyed by the way she sometimes presents her sleep advice because it is *not* always as simple as watching awake time. But I don't think using Ferber at 5 months makes her a "disgusting" mother. You may not agree with it but Ferber does not = CIO (and I think her use of that term is part of what got her flamed).
Look, if you're judging the success of CIO by saying "Well he fell asleep eventually" then of course it worked. I feel exhausted after an especially long crying session, so I can only imagine how your poor baby felt. And taking away the swaddle at the same time is just cruel. Not only are you not comforting him yourself, but you're also taking away something that could comfort him without you. This is just like taking your daughter's paci away while making her CIO...you don't allow them to have something that comforts them. Why? Because you decided it was time to give it up?
I agree with Emjay, Baz, and pretty much everyone else on this thread. You have to be one heartless biitch to allow your children to cry for 1-2 hours. I don't care how old they are, you need to comfort your kids when they cry. And the "watching awake times" thing is fvcking ridiculous. Your anal retentive approach to parenting makes me sick. Go crawl into a hole somewhere and stop preaching your ways to anyone who will listen. You are not a sleep expert and you do not have all the answers. Stop stalking TB and just go the fvck away. Kthxbai.