Hello, let me introduce myself first..
For the first 30 years of my life, everything was smooth and worry-free. I was my parents’ most beloved child, found my true love in college, and happily married him after graduation.
At work, I was my boss’s most valued employee. Whenever I was in charge of a project, colleagues would inevitably say, “Oh, then I’m totally at ease.” I was constantly named “Employee of the Year,” with generous bonuses every year.
Later, I started my own business. Within just three months, I had broken into the market and started making money. By the fifth month, I was earning twice my previous salary. Growth was steady month after month. Right when the business needed more hands, I serendipitously met an amazing partner, and the company reached a whole new level.
Really, it seemed like at every step, whatever I needed, a pair of hands would always place it right in front of me, just in time.
My Two Girls: Ellie & Mia
Meet Ellie, My Firstborn
In 2020, my husband and I decided to have a child. After trying for over a year, we finally got the news in 2021 that a little one was on the way. In 2022, we welcomed our first child, Ellie. She made me a mother.
She is utterly adorable—big eyes, rosy skin, chubby little hands. Every time I look at her, I can’t help but give her a kiss. She is pure joy, and I love her more each day.
But as a first-time mom, I faced unprecedented difficulties. The postpartum tearing wouldn’t heal, and the pain was excruciating. Clogged milk ducts made my breasts hard as rocks. The severe sleep deprivation… And what was even more crushing was that, with zero parenting experience, I was clueless when faced with her unexplained wailing, night terrors, refusal to nurse, constipation, diarrhea, fevers… I desperately searched online, longing for one accurate, truly useful answer!
It was during this time that I thought, once I make it through this “dark” path, I must leave a light on for other new moms.
And Then Came Mia
Ellie had just turned one when I got pregnant again. In 2024, we welcomed our second daughter, Mia.
Completely different from Ellie, Mia is a great eater and sleeper. Although she had her fussy moments in the first two months, starting almost from month three, she became super easygoing. She feeds on schedule, gradually sleeps through the night, loves her solid foods, and adapted quickly when I had to stop breastfeeding due to mastitis.
This made me realize just how vastly different babies can be! It made me even more determined to write about my experiences.
Why I Had to Start This Blog
The Catalyst: A Life Pivoted
After Mia was born, my business also began to decline sharply. I had no choice but to close it and become a full-time mom. My work no longer involves Excel and Word, but instead revolves around changing diapers, washing bottles, making baby food, and managing household chores…
This has been a monumental challenge for me. All my past achievements seem irrelevant now. Managing two young children has brought me a sense of frustration I’ve never known before.
The Daily Reality
They are always fighting over things. When one is in my arms, the other immediately demands to be held too. When I try to cook, Ellie wants me to read her a book. When I attempt to load the washing machine, Mia has a diaper blowout, and I must drop everything to change her…
By the time I finish all that, I see the cup of hot coffee on the table has gone cold again. And it’s not until evening that I remember, “Oh my goodness, the clothes are still in the hamper, unwashed!”
Of course, being a mom is filled with happiness, but that doesn’t negate how hard it is.
My Promise to You
Because I’ve walked this path myself, I won’t just tell you how joyful motherhood is, like many websites do. I want to share my real, unfiltered experiences so every new mom can find a “companion” here.
I want to tell you: you are not alone. What you’re going through, I’ve been there too. Your breakdowns, your helplessness, your moments of losing control—I’ve had them all. You don’t need to feel guilty. This is just a small, necessary stretch of the journey for every mom.
My Hope for This Space
I really want to share my parenting experiences—not just the warm, glowing moments, but to honestly document the pitfalls I’ve stumbled into, the tears I’ve shed, and the “survival wisdom” I’ve scraped together in utter exhaustion.
The Goal: A Mom’s Toolkit
I hope this blog becomes a “mom’s toolkit,” filled not with vague theories, but with:
- Practical Tips: Like how to quickly figure out why a baby is crying, tried-and-true methods for dealing with clogged ducts, or how to efficiently manage the daily grind with twins (or two under two) solo.
- Pitfall Avoidance Guides: Sharing the baby products I regret buying the most, and those “game-changer” parenting hacks. Letting you know which parenting anxieties you can let go of, and which principles are worth holding onto.
- A Community for Moms: I hope my stories connect me with more moms like you. We can cheer each other on in the comments, share our own tricks, turning the storms we face alone into a journey we walk together.
The Bigger Vision
My previous career taught me to analyze data, solve problems, and optimize processes. Now, I’m applying all those skills to this new “position” of Mom. I want to prove that a mom’s value is absolutely not confined to the home. The mindset, resilience, and creativity we built in our careers can shine just as brightly—perhaps even brighter—in this more complex, long-term “project” of raising humans, and can even be transformed into a force that helps others.
My hope is simple: that every mom who opens this blog can let out a sigh of relief and say, “So it’s not just me.” Then, she can find a bit of practical info, a dose of comforting solidarity, and return to her sweet, chaotic mom-life with a little more confidence and a little less weight on her shoulders.
This road? Let’s walk it together.
rachellaura86
member
Re: Husband going away while I'm 36 weeks pregnant
I would let him go. If my FI were to ask to go out of town with friends this weekend, I'd say okay. It's not going to be very easy once baby is here. I haven't shown any signs of PTL, so I feel confident. I'm also a FTM, so I'm more likely to go past my due date than early.
You probably are more emotional now that you are in your third trimester, and need his support, but I would tough it out. He's not going to get a second chance to go to his best friends' bachelor party (at least hopefully not).
I would let him go. He's only going to be 3 hours away.
Ugh I know! My pregnancy has been pretty normal (knock on wood) but I keep envisioning myself going into labor early and I'm getting freaked out.
The trip is late Friday to early Sunday. I think he would be disappointed if he didnt go. I know he was kinda jealous I went on like 8 million girl's trips and has been looking forward to a guy's trip.
I really dont want to hold him back. He knows I am getting a bit freaked out about the birth, so I almost wish he would intuitively say he'll forget it and stay home. I dont think thats going to happen though!!
This. I'd be worried if it was farther away but this seems fine.
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BFP #1 9/7/10, EDD 5/14/11, Violet born 5/27/11.
BFP #2 4/9/12, EDD 12/16/12, M/C Rory 4/24/12.
BFP #3 10/6/12, EDD 6/16/12., Matilda born 6/17/13.
Agree to all this.
I would let him go. My DH was out of town, and out of cell service for a weekend at 35 weeks. And while it made me slightly nervous,after all his hard work these last 8 months and all his help, I felt like he deserved one last weekend away.
If you have family near by, I think its just a few days, and he's only a few hours away.
It's only 3 hours away so I'd say that's fine. You will probably want to labor at home for a few hours before heading into the hospital anyway unless you are an extremely rare case that progresses quickly. Regardless, 3 hours is most likely enough time for him to get back if need be. The only thing I would want if my DH were to go away to something like that would be to make sure he had his cell phone on so I could reach him if I needed too. Also, my other concern would be if he was drinking and so wouldn't be able to drive back if I did call. I have been fine with DH going out and having drinks with the guys the whole pregnancy but I'm not comfortable with it during these last few weeks because I want him to be able to drive me if he needs too. I'm guessing there will be a lot of drinking since its a bachelor party but would your DH be up for maybe being the sober driver or sticking to one beer or something so he can drive home if he has too?
If you guys can figure that out then I'd say let him go! You most likely will not go into labor and he is not that far away. DH and I drove almost 3 hours away this past weekend when I was 35.5 weeks because I felt comfortable that we could get back if I started having and signs of PTL.
is the trip just saturday or all weekend? ... I think one night away is ok. but more than that , I would ask dh to come home early. I would also call him to come home...with any sign of labor coming . so to give him plenty of time to get home.
Adding to the chorus...let him go and suck it up. I agree it sucks, but it's basically just 2 nights and 1 full day, your husband will really enjoy himself, and you're going to REALLY not want him to go anywhere after baby is born.
Plus 3 hours is really not that far...and if he was drinking as PP notes, he could either find a friend to drive him back or in the worst case get a taxi/take a bus/train. Anything can be dealt with if it needs to be.
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DS1 born 08.02.11
DS2 born 12.05.13
Let him go. He is only 3 hrs away. Just take it easy. If you want have a friend or family member come stay with you if it will make you feel better.
My husband has to take two trips with his work. One for the week I am 35 weeks and one for the whole week when I am 37 weeks. For the second trip I think I will ask my MIL to come stay with me since I delievered #2 at 37w 6d.
I totally agree. Let him go. I know you're pregnant and all...we all understand and are in the same position....but I think it's a bit selfish of you to take away this chance for him to enjoy with his best friends. It was planned out for a long time. You should sacrifice a little bit for him, and chances are...if the pregnancy is going smoothly that you won't go into PTL. I just find it odd, that you would rather him sit beside your bedside all weekend long, do nothing with you, than him go enjoy with his friends.