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July 2011 Moms
Alright, extended BF
This discussion has been closed.
Re: Alright, extended BF
That's just not true, you are completely generalizing and stereotyping BFers. I have no attachment issues with my DD and she BFed until she was 21 months. We did not cosleep, she did not self-wean, I did not wear her. She just wanted some of mommy's milk a couple of times a day in addition to her reg. diet and I was home with her, so I gave it to her.
Both your points don't make sense to me. DD would always try to pull down my shirt, it was her way of telling me she was hungry. She had teeth around 16 months, they don't BITE...
I'm sure you are a fine mother, but you usually come across as uncaring and not even remotely nurturing as a mother. Even though we are both having our 3rd child and we should be able to relate to one another, I cannot connect with you at all b/c we truly could not be more different.
I BF'ed exclusively and ended up with children 18 months apart
My children are happy, loved, polite, caring, well balanced individuals. I do everything for them, always have because I was a single mother. My views & parenting style dont make me uncaring or un nurturing. Im real, because I dont breast feed, let my kids cry it out, & dont believe in co sleeping doesnt make me a bad mother, I actually think it makes me a better one.
You're right we couldnt be more different, some of the best friends Ive made on this board are total opposites of me & my parenting style, but unlike you we've got an amazing thing called respect for each other. I fully support them & they me.
FWIW I exaggerated a lot of my views on this to make for good conversation based on a boring as hell few days on TB way to go for officially being a douche bag.
Did I say all extended breast feeders are BSC people anywhere in here? Nope, some of the responses on here including yours do further prove the point in my mind though that it is in fact more for the mother than the child though.
I personally seek intimate relations from my husband not my children.
Thats kind of the point in feeding them table food, or continuing with baby food if that is your choice. They can get all their daily needs from a variety of foods. I never said JUST cow's milk. Thank you.
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I stopped pumping at work at 9 months and then weaned her when I was around 18 weeks pregnant. I was like one of the other posters and breastfed mostly at night or when she wasn't feeling well. I delayed milk products due to a strong family history of lactose intolerance on both sides. Her pediatrician said it was fine. We did supplement with formula as well though since I wasn't pumping anymore and the freezer stash was running low. I didn't take her out in public and nurse her cause she didn't need that. Most people didn't know I still nursed her after she was 9 months old even. I didn't wean for allergy fears and for ease of night feedings. I didn't cry when I weaned her, I was ready and I really feel like she was too because she hardly nursed and it only took a couple nights before she fell asleep without nursing. Thanks for all the input. I understand where people are coming from a little better now
Right. Mainemommy you probably hate your kids. And puppies. Do you even know what love is???
Jilly are you seriously proud of yourself right now? Do you feel like you are in any position to judge an internet strangers parenting? This is quickly breaking down into a "I feel sorry for your kids/husband" debate, and that's the fastest signifier of an uneducated argument.
I agree a variety of food is very important. All I was stating was the bm has as much if not more fat and nutrients than cow's milk.
let's end this here before things further get out of hand.
Awesome, so you understand I am not so ignorant as to think or say that a child can live on cow's milk alone. Glad we understand each other now
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I think of this every time I force myself to drink some & since being pregnant it actually makes me gag.
I seriously just shuddered thinking about it.
Sorry- hey there is always soy milk, no boobies there
& the chocolate & vanilla stuff isnt actually all that bad.
Agreed. We can get flamed together
Tyler is going to be a big brother!
I haven't finished the thread yet, so I hope someone has already said this but why would you suggest someone stop giving their child milk that is tailored to their needs to substitute it with milk from a cow?
What happens at 12 months, 1 day that makes breastfeeding creepier than it was the day before?
Now, now Judgey McJudgerton...It's one thing to call out a person based on what their opinion, but to insinuate that they are a bad parent is just shiity.
I think you come across as an uncaring and not even remotely nurturing as a mother because you feel the need to insult an internet stranger based on the severely limited snippets of her life you have. Are you passing those glorious traits on to your children? Classy.
I found this entire post creepy and proving of MM's point.
I don't find 12 months to be a magic number, but definitely before 18 months.
Holy cross the line batman. Way to be a complete cvnt with this statement. I'm late to the game, hopefully you've realized this and apologized.
I wasn't specifically speaking of this post regarding BF'ing. I BF'ed for a year (a little longer with #2, but whatever). I hardly think I qualify as BSC. Further, I have never said anything negative regarding FF'ers. It's just another way to nourish your baby. It is what it is. The uncaring/non-nurturing part is just a thought that has crossed my mind so many times before. Everything with you seems so cut and dry, black or white - there is little room for negotiating and you seem so incredibly short on patience - right there, you are lacking two qualities that great parents (and subsequently children) have.
I often wondered if you actually believe most of what you write, or if you are trying to make drama, er, I mean good conversation. Either way, it doens't affect my life one way or another. I was just calling it as I saw it. I thought you would appreciate that.
Lastly, do people really use the word DB to refer to other women? We don't speak like that where I am from. Now, I must insert some eye rolls and other faces - I guess that's how it's done!
I didn't say she was a bad parent. I said she comes across as uncaring - not towards her children, just people in general. I also said she seems to lack a nurturing quality - babies get formula (unless they are preemies), they sleep in their own crib/bed, they CIO, you don't wear them so they learn to be independent (?), they spend the entire hospital stay in the nursery b/c the nurses like to snuggle babies - I could go on and on. She is on this board non-stop telling people how awful she thinks their opinions are but everyone defends her. One of my original points was that she is another 3rd timer and I thought we might have something in common - but, we don't. Oh well. It is what it is! I have met plenty of other moms over the years IRL (not on the internet!) that I have little or nothing in common with. I don't hate them, we are just not friends.
I'm sure mainemommy's children are wonderful. She didn't seem too upset by what I said. You shouldn't be either.
And there you go generalizing again.
WTF.
And so what if the mother is meeting her own needs with extended bf? It's still good for the baby, so happy mom=happy baby. What is wrong with that?
No where have I ever said I banish my babies to the nursery the entire hospital stay so you obviously arent paying as close attention to me as you think you are. I said I send them in so I can sleep.
Also you forgot the biggest one, the one that made you start hating on me. I actually discipline my children & I feel like yours will walk all over you as teenagers because you dont.
I really hope all this still exists in 20 years so we can see how all 6+ of our children turn out mine vs yours.
The whole thing is generalizing though, it wasnt a case by case arguement. & that remark was pointed at her more than anything, she's a very crunchy I love my kids more than my husband kind of person.
Do I think some women are capable of extended breast feeding for no reason other than their child? Yes. Do I think that some women do it for themselves as well as their children? Yes. Do I think some women get some sick sense of satisaction out of extended breastfeeding? A huge yes.
5 year old on the boob, cant tell me thats for the kid. Like I said before, Mommy needs to go love on Daddy instead.
Ok first and foremost, this thread is about opinions and this is mine. If you don't like it to bad. Secondly if you and apparently some others need to read ALL of what I wrote. I have never and would never presume to say that cows milk alone is enough to sustain a growing child, however the rest of their daily food intake supplements it. With the other food that you child eats in a day added to cows milk, you breast milk is not NECESSARY. (note the capitlalized word) I never said it would hurt your child and you should stop, just that with everything else your child consumes in a day your milk isn't a requirement. And yes it is my opinion that when your child can walk up to you and pull your shirt down, climb under it or verbally ask to be nursed, it is time to stop. Let the child grow up and move on to the net step, life withOUT mommy's boob. I don't care if you like my opinion or not. In the post of mine you quoted I said it was an opinion and you are not going to change my mind. I have already explained myself plenty and am tired of JUDGEMENTAL momma's trying to find fault with my opinions and what I am personally comfortable with. I would never presume to force my opinions down your throat and expect the same respect. If I were to see someone nursing a 3 year old in public, I wouldn't say anything and you would never know how I felt on the matter.
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There's nothing medically/nutritionally wrong with it, but a grown woman needing the emotional connection/fulfillment of a child sucking on her boob is abosolutely creepy to me. It can (as evidence from above post) create an unhealthy attachment issue parent to child.