September 2011 Moms

Anatomy scan...not such good news

So we had our AS yesterday. We were really stoked because we had not seen LO since the 8 week sonogram.

We had the ultrasound and it was pretty amazing. The heart was pumping away, LO was moving around. We got 7 awesome pictures and we went back into the waiting room to wait for the monthly exam.

We got into the room, the doc came in and told us (with a big smile on his face) that the ultrasound tech saw some things that concerned her. I asked "Soft markers?" and he said yes, for Down Syndrome. He went on to tell us that he was going to arrange for us to get a consult at a high-risk place and that they needed to do further tests right away. That was it, he walked out. My poor DH lost it when the doc left and started sobbing. Anyone ever see their husband sob? It is heartbreaking.

Unfortunately we had made dinner plans with my family to show them the pics. Afterwards we had made plans to stop by the ILs to show them.

My father knew something was wrong from my face and we had to tell first my family, and later his.

I know that soft markers aren't conclusive, but they are pretty damn frightening. What has us really concerned is how the doc told us that we needed to get in to the high-risk place right away. I know a lot of people that have soft markers are told to wait and see how things are on the next ultrasound, so his need for speed is adding to our overwhelming anxiety. I guess we will have more info tomorrow when we go to the high-risk place.

Oh, and we were able to hold out and not find out the baby's sex, even though it was devilshly hard.

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Re: Anatomy scan...not such good news

  • I'm so sorry you have to head over to the high risk place. I hope they are just being extra thorough, please update us with your results. My T&Ps are with you.

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  • I'm so sorry for your bad news... I hope and pray that everything will turn out to be ok.
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  • I am so sorry about your news! Thoughts and prayers to you, your husband, and your LO. So when is your appt at the high-risk place?
    ~ Josh & Jill, married 5/2/09 ~
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  • First of all, take a deep breath. Nothing is conclusive yet.

    Second, get a new Doctor. Seriously that is unforgivable. He should have sat down and talked with you at length, answered any questions... It's no wonder he referred you to a high risk Dr... he has NO bedside manner and just seems like he wanted to go about his day. What a douche.

    FWIW I have had quite a few friends have "soft markers" and they ALL had 100% healthy babies. It's better to look into anything and be prepared.

    Please keep us updated. And please look into switching Dr's. I am just appalled.

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  • I'm sending T&P your way.
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  • Sorry to hear that! Hopefully the upcoming tests show that everything is normal :(
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  • I'm so sorry to hear that!  Hopefully your visit at the high risk place will provide you with more positive news.  Stay strong!  My thoughts and prayers are with you guys!
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  • How scary.  I hope you get some more answers and good news tomorrow.  T&Ps to you and DH.
  • I am so sorry that you got potentially bad news.  I'll be thinking about you.
    DD1: 3/31/10 DD2: 9/7/11
  • I hope they are able to give you good news at the high risk place. My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family.
    Mommy to three adorable boys!
  • So sorry you're dealing with this; my thoughts and prayers are with you and your DH.  We actually got a call the night of our big ultrasound saying that we had to have a follow up ultrasound with a perinatologist the following day so I completely understand you being frightened about him using the phrase "right away".  That being said, the perinatologist was not very concerned with what she saw and we felt a zillion times better when we left there.  Hope all goes well today; please keep us posted.
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  • imageTraycee1242:

    First of all, take a deep breath. Nothing is conclusive yet.

    Second, get a new Doctor. Seriously that is unforgivable. He should have sat down and talked with you at length, answered any questions... It's no wonder he referred you to a high risk Dr... he has NO bedside manner and just seems like he wanted to go about his day. What a douche.

    FWIW I have had quite a few friends have "soft markers" and they ALL had 100% healthy babies. It's better to look into anything and be prepared.

    Please keep us updated. And please look into switching Dr's. I am just appalled.

    All of this. Word for word.

    I'm praying everything is just fine. Keep us updated!

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  • I am so sorry you are having this experience. It must be overwhelmingly frustrating to have to wait until tomorrow to see the high risk doctor.

    Try to stay strong. I know it's almost impossible. If you need to talk, I'm here.

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  • I'll be thinking of you and your family..I hope everything will turn out just fine!
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  • I would try not to dwell on your doctor wanting you to get checked right away, especially if those other ppl have different doctors. It just might be your doctors style to have you checked right away.

    I am sorry to hear that you had to endure this news but sometimes we are given "bad" news and it turns out to be a false alarm.

    I hope all works out for you.

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  • So sorry to hear that.  Hopefully it's nothing and the high risk place will be able to put your mind at ease.  T&P's for you and your DH, I hope tomorrow brings good news.  ((HUGS))
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  • imageveronicafvr:
    I am so sorry about your news! Thoughts and prayers to you, your husband, and your LO. So when is your appt at the high-risk place?

    Thanks ladies. I am trying to keep positive, but it is not very easy.

    My appointment is tomorrow. It is a consult. My level II is May 11. If the level II comes back abnormal, the next step is the amnio.

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  • I'm so sorry.  Hopefully this is just an abundance of caution, and everything will work out for the best.  Good luck.
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  • I'm adding my thoughts & prayers as well. I hope you can make your appointment quickly & have the answers your need. I am glad you have the support of your family & lean on your DH to help you get through this time.

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  • I am so sorry to hear this. I will keep you all in my prayers and pray that everything turns out perfectly. I too have seen my DH sob and it is the most heartbreaking thing I think I have ever seen. Stay strong. Everything will be ok.
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  • I am so sorry to hear this.  You and your DH have every right to be scared and upset.  I will hope and pray that everything turns out ok for your little one.  Please keep us posted.
  • Wow I'm so sorry you all got some bad news. I am praying for you and hope everything goes well when you go to the high-risk place.

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  • Thoughts and prayers are headed your way!!  I hope everything goes well at the high-risk doctor, and let us know how things go.  I'll be thinking of you & your DH & your LO today!



       
  • You and your family are in my thoughts. Hopefully there is nothing to worry about.. I have heard many stories about people finding soft markers and having perfectly healthy babies! Hoping for the best :) Keep us posted.
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  • I'm praying that you get some answers and more information from the high-risk place and that things turn out wonderfully for you, your husband, and your precious baby.  I'm so sorry you are having to deal with this. ((HUGS))

     

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  • Oh Molly, I'm so sorry.  The best thing we can do right now is stay positive.  I know it's easier said than done (I actually lost a few lbs during our week of hell), but if you can stay calm and relaxed, it's better for the baby.  Bubble baths helped me out a lot.  I will keep you and your DH (It's VERY hard to see them break down, I think I cried a-whole-nother round just because of how hard DH was crying) and your LO in my thoughts and prayers.
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  • I am so sorry to hear this...just keep in mind it's not definite.  Try and keep your hopes up.  T&P your way. 
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  • I'm so sorry for the bad news you received.  T&Ps for you and your sweet baby.  I would think the sense of urgency is because of how far along you are, but I agree that the doctor handled it poorly.  I hope the best for your follow up tests!
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  • imagenatkay02:
    imageTraycee1242:

    First of all, take a deep breath. Nothing is conclusive yet.

    Second, get a new Doctor. Seriously that is unforgivable. He should have sat down and talked with you at length, answered any questions... It's no wonder he referred you to a high risk Dr... he has NO bedside manner and just seems like he wanted to go about his day. What a douche.

    FWIW I have had quite a few friends have "soft markers" and they ALL had 100% healthy babies. It's better to look into anything and be prepared.

    Please keep us updated. And please look into switching Dr's. I am just appalled.

     

    All of this. Word for word.

    I'm praying everything is just fine. Keep us updated!

    Me too.  Thinking and praying for you sweetie.

  • I hope everything works out for you!!

    Keep in mind that different practices have different policies on how fast they do follow-up tests. In my practice any suspicion of a problem (i.e. soft markers, such as choroid cysts in my case) is investigated with a level 2 ultrasound or other tests within the same week! Even if the doctor is not very concerned. So the speed may be purely a factor of policies.

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  • How rude of your doc not to even spend a little more time with you than that! Who the hell walks in, grinning  no less, to tell a couple their might be something wrong with their kid and turns around and leaves??

    I hope you get into the high risk docs quickly and find out there's nothing to be worried about. Keep us updated! HUGS to you. 

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  • imageTraycee1242:

    First of all, take a deep breath. Nothing is conclusive yet.

    Second, get a new Doctor. Seriously that is unforgivable. He should have sat down and talked with you at length, answered any questions... It's no wonder he referred you to a high risk Dr... he has NO bedside manner and just seems like he wanted to go about his day. What a douche.

    FWIW I have had quite a few friends have "soft markers" and they ALL had 100% healthy babies. It's better to look into anything and be prepared.

    Please keep us updated. And please look into switching Dr's. I am just appalled.

    I agree, the doctor sounded like a douche. Bad news is bad news regardless but he didn't have to be such a jerk about it.

    However, I will keep everything crossed for you that the soft markers don't mean anything. Do you know when you will see the high risk doctor?

    Wyatt 9/6/2011 
    Tessa 7/5/2013
    Baby #3- ????? (ttc soon)


  • Praying that everything works out ok.
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  • I am so sorry you're going through that ((((hugs))))

    I hope that you guys get some good news soon!

    Lots of thoughts and prayers for you all!

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  • I am sorry you had this experience.  We had one very similar a couple weeks ago. (We had a possible heart defect and 2 soft markers.)  I feel your pain.  Praying you find comfort and that your LO is healthy!
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  • I am so sorry. And even more sorry that your doctor seems like a big a-hole, with the way he told you guys and handled the news. Do you know what soft markers they saw?

    My thoughts are with you and your LO. I'm hoping everything will turn out alright. Please keep us updated. :::hugs::: 

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  • I am sorry you guys have to deal with this. Get a new OB because you never should have been treated so callously. Hopefully the high risk doctor can give you more info. Mine is wonderful. I hope you get lucky too.
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  • I'm sorry about the intermediate results and possible soft markers but do your best to stay calm -- a healthy mom is a healthy baby.  Hopefully you'll get some answers soon and your little one is just fine.

    In the meantime - we're here for you Molly! Hugs.

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  • Im so sorry for the news your received - lots of thoughts and prayers for you and LO...I would maybe contact the Dr.'s office and express the fact that you were extremely dissatisfied with the way your Dr. informed you of this and the fact that he did not give you a chance to discuss anything or ask any questions. Definitely should have been handled better.
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