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I survived Easter

chloebeth930chloebeth930 member
in TTC After a Loss

I survived Easter.  It was a little rough at times since this is when we would have told our extended family.  Dinner at the in-laws went fine because it was just DH's immediate family (they all knew about the m/c) so no one brought up anything related to babies and there was no young children running around.

However, I did have one "excuse me while I go privately cry in the bathroom moment" at my family's dinner (no one there knew about the pregnancy).  My aunt is going out of town and my mom was asking her kids if they wanted to do something on Sat.  I made some joke to my mom about why she didn't ask me if I wanted to hang out Sat. and my aunt said, "why don't you come over and babysit on Sat.  Then you can know what it feels like to have kids for a few days."  She wasn't saying it in a mean way, but more in a joking way. 

I got up and went to go cry in the bathroom. I wish I could have said, "I did know what it felt like to have a kid for a few days... weeks even.  I also know what it felt like to lose that kid."  I hate that some of my family still sees me as a little kid (I'm 25).  Sometimes I feel like there is this "club" within my family.  If you don't have any children, then you just aren't really a grown up.

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Re: I survived Easter

  • karma79karma79 member

    I'm sorry you had a rough patch during Easter. I did too. But like you my thought is, I survived.

    Big hug!

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  • MuffinhbMuffinhb member
    (Hugs) Im sorry.

    BFP#1 11.19.10 Missed MC 01.10.11 Sam & Alex
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  • rosenb2brosenb2b member
    Are you close to your mom?  If so, and you feel up to it, maybe you should tell her about your loss.  I didn't want to tell my Mom either but after my feelings kept getting hurt, etc.  I found it was so much easier to just let her know...she really tries not to say or do things to hurt me now; not that it was ever intentional!!  {HUGS}...Glad you made it through Easter! 
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  • chloebeth930chloebeth930 member

    imagerosenb2b:
    Are you close to your mom?  If so, and you feel up to it, maybe you should tell her about your loss.  I didn't want to tell my Mom either but after my feelings kept getting hurt, etc.  I found it was so much easier to just let her know...she really tries not to say or do things to hurt me now; not that it was ever intentional!!  {HUGS}...Glad you made it through Easter! 

    Yes, my mom does know about my loss (there is no way I could have made it through without her), it was my aunt who made the comment that made me cry.   I didn't tell anyone on that side of the family (grandma, aunts/uncles, cousins).  I come from a huge, but very close, family. I didn't tell anyone, because I just didn't want that many people knowing and trying to talk to me about it.

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  • TapatioTapatio

    I'm sorry hun ((hugs)). It's amazing how someone's seemingly innocent comment can hurt like hell. I also know what you mean about being excluded from the "exclusive parenting club." It sucks! 

    Natural MCs 2/4/09, 8/22/09 & 4/7/10
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    5/22/12...2nd Betas- 207, P4 6.1 (MC confirmed)
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  • morkmork member
    I'm sorry hun, that sucks. ((hugs))
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    Mama to 5 angel babies, 1 rainbow baby, and 2 more angel babies. 
    My beautiful Ella/ToT arrived 10/10/12. 
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  • corndog8corndog8
    I'm sorry you had a rough time.  ((hugs))
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