baby napping ?
so I should know this, but its amazing how much you cannot remember from baby to baby......so we've done the babywise (eat, play, sleep) method for the other two boys (and we also use CIO) and I'm re-reading the babywise book now. and I know I can start this now, but I'm having troubles getting Kellen to nap during the day....is it too young to let him CIO (he's 4 weeks old)? I can tell he's definitely sleepy, I swaddle him up, put him in his crib, leave and then 15 minutes later he is crying, hard....I try to soothe, just by rubbing his head and giving him his paci but not picking him up and he'll fall back asleep but then 15 minutes later he's awake and wailing again....any suggestions? I know I was able to put Finn and Riley in the crib sleepy but awake and they would fall asleep on their own....I'm sure they went through this phase at the beginning too but I just can't remember what I did or what I should do.
so I've been either putting him in the swing or holding him till he is dead asleep (or just holding him for his entire nap because he is the third and last baby, ha!), but I know those are "crutches" and I can't keep doing that.....especially once I'm here with all three boys on my own and will need my arms to take care of the two older boys....
Re: baby napping ?
Yeah, Lila is still sleeping all the time, and I worry she is sleeping too much! I wouldn't do CIO yet, but what do I know, Finn didn't sttn til he was 8 months, so I probably don't know what I am talking about
Since I recently went through this, I feel like this is finally a baby subject on here I can at least relay my experience!
I read up on and loosely followed Babywise as well. However, I did not agree with the notion of allowing a tiny baby to CIO for up to an hour at a time for naps like it advises from the get-go. Rather, in the beginning, I would do whatever it took to get E to get a decent nap in, even if that meant sleeping on me or in the swing. We did more of the BW CIO methods when she was around 2 months, but even then I would only do it for less than 10 minutes. Everything I read other than BW was really specific that they just weren't ready for full CIO until at least 4 months, and most recommended 6 months.
I was really worried about creating a bad habit WRT sleeping/napping, but I honestly think that at that age, it just isn't possible. So I would just do what works at this point and not worry about it. When he hits 3-4 months and needs more structure, then you might try revisiting the stricter napping methods BW advocates.
Good luck!!!!
So I thought for a while before posting this, and I want you to know that I mean this in the nicest possible way, I am not being snarky or attacking you at all, I just wanted to share some info I found.
Babywise is the only child rearing book/philosophy that the American Academy of Pediatrics has come out and condemned as being harmful to children. I googled and found multiple articles, as well as a report from the AAP comparing its recommendations to Babywise to show the deficiencies. The author has absolutely no qualifications, or even a bachelor's degree I believe. None of his children will speak to him or his wife, they have no relationship if that tells you anything. Both have been excommunicated from several churches.
Your baby is only 4 weeks old, and according to Dr. Ferber, the author of CIO, he's entirely too young to consider any kind of sleep training. He recommends between 4-6 months once they're emotionally ready. Your instinct to cuddle him because he'll be your last, plus PP's suggestion to just do what works without worrying about spoiling him or creating bad habits is spot on.
Before anyone says it, yes, I know that I don't have children. I don't have to have kids to know how to read and learn about child rearing techniques. Anyway, I'm not going to comment further. I don't mean this as criticism, you seem like a really good. loving mother. I just wanted to share this information with you in case you were not aware of it. Good luck.
We did a combo of babywise and moms on call. With Bailey, I put him down more asleep then awake in the pnp in our dining until 8 weeks. Then I moved him to his crib. He never slept past 45minutes unitl 7-8 months old but he sttn so I never pushed naps. After 8wks I let him whine/cry for 15-20minues. Bailey was never a sleepy newborn but I figured if he got a little bit of sleep between feedings he was fine. It wasn't great for me but like I said he sttn.
With Bryce I needed him to nap since after week 2 I was all alone with 2 little ones. I started him in his crib for naps at 4wks. I would let him get almost asleep then put him down. I'd let him whine/fussy but not full out cry. Once he was 8wks I put him down more awake but sleepy and let him cry 10-15minutes. By 5 months he started doing 2 naps a day for 1hour in the mornings and 2 hours in the afternoon.
Rocking bassinet. That is all I have to say. We would not survive without it. I will be royally screwed when he out grows it, but we'll just deal with that when the time comes.
DD- 9
DS-6
c/p- April 2016
missed m/c- 6w5d; discovered 8w2d- September 2016
Then you can pretty much assume no one will take anything you say into account. Consider yourself persona non grata on this board. I don't even know why you bother. Please take it elsewhere.
The babywise information is pretty recent (I think it has come out in the time since C was born because I started looking at sleep stuff when he was about 4 months old, I think and was just seeing the information then). There have been links between babywise and dehydration and other health issues with babies/children. Here's a link to an AAP excerpt: https://aapnews.aappublications.org/cgi/content/abstract/14/4/21
Our pediatrician, and most "sleep training" books I've seen/read recommend starting around 4-6 months. I think our pediatrician said something like...you can't form bad habits before about 3 or 4 months old, so until then, you do whatever you can to get sleep and help everyone else sleep. They just don't have the capacity to form logical thoughts at that point, so your goal is to do what is needed to ensure they (and you!) get some sleep.
I can't imagine trying to help a newborn sleep with other kids! Gah, we struggle now. But hang in there - I think your instinct to cuddle and just get sleep is spot on. Don't worry about bad habits just yet - get through this tough part (with your sanity hopefully!).
Totally not trying to start a debate but that link is from 1998. The edition I have which is the newest (I'm not sure if there was any change with previous editions) says if your baby acts hungry feed it. There is no letting the baby cry for hours on end. Both my boys are thriving and have always been on a schedule since day 1. It is what works for us and for almost all of my friends.