Hello, let me introduce myself first..
For the first 30 years of my life, everything was smooth and worry-free. I was my parents’ most beloved child, found my true love in college, and happily married him after graduation.
At work, I was my boss’s most valued employee. Whenever I was in charge of a project, colleagues would inevitably say, “Oh, then I’m totally at ease.” I was constantly named “Employee of the Year,” with generous bonuses every year.
Later, I started my own business. Within just three months, I had broken into the market and started making money. By the fifth month, I was earning twice my previous salary. Growth was steady month after month. Right when the business needed more hands, I serendipitously met an amazing partner, and the company reached a whole new level.
Really, it seemed like at every step, whatever I needed, a pair of hands would always place it right in front of me, just in time.
My Two Girls: Ellie & Mia
Meet Ellie, My Firstborn
In 2020, my husband and I decided to have a child. After trying for over a year, we finally got the news in 2021 that a little one was on the way. In 2022, we welcomed our first child, Ellie. She made me a mother.
She is utterly adorable—big eyes, rosy skin, chubby little hands. Every time I look at her, I can’t help but give her a kiss. She is pure joy, and I love her more each day.
But as a first-time mom, I faced unprecedented difficulties. The postpartum tearing wouldn’t heal, and the pain was excruciating. Clogged milk ducts made my breasts hard as rocks. The severe sleep deprivation… And what was even more crushing was that, with zero parenting experience, I was clueless when faced with her unexplained wailing, night terrors, refusal to nurse, constipation, diarrhea, fevers… I desperately searched online, longing for one accurate, truly useful answer!
It was during this time that I thought, once I make it through this “dark” path, I must leave a light on for other new moms.
And Then Came Mia
Ellie had just turned one when I got pregnant again. In 2024, we welcomed our second daughter, Mia.
Completely different from Ellie, Mia is a great eater and sleeper. Although she had her fussy moments in the first two months, starting almost from month three, she became super easygoing. She feeds on schedule, gradually sleeps through the night, loves her solid foods, and adapted quickly when I had to stop breastfeeding due to mastitis.
This made me realize just how vastly different babies can be! It made me even more determined to write about my experiences.
Why I Had to Start This Blog
The Catalyst: A Life Pivoted
After Mia was born, my business also began to decline sharply. I had no choice but to close it and become a full-time mom. My work no longer involves Excel and Word, but instead revolves around changing diapers, washing bottles, making baby food, and managing household chores…
This has been a monumental challenge for me. All my past achievements seem irrelevant now. Managing two young children has brought me a sense of frustration I’ve never known before.
The Daily Reality
They are always fighting over things. When one is in my arms, the other immediately demands to be held too. When I try to cook, Ellie wants me to read her a book. When I attempt to load the washing machine, Mia has a diaper blowout, and I must drop everything to change her…
By the time I finish all that, I see the cup of hot coffee on the table has gone cold again. And it’s not until evening that I remember, “Oh my goodness, the clothes are still in the hamper, unwashed!”
Of course, being a mom is filled with happiness, but that doesn’t negate how hard it is.
My Promise to You
Because I’ve walked this path myself, I won’t just tell you how joyful motherhood is, like many websites do. I want to share my real, unfiltered experiences so every new mom can find a “companion” here.
I want to tell you: you are not alone. What you’re going through, I’ve been there too. Your breakdowns, your helplessness, your moments of losing control—I’ve had them all. You don’t need to feel guilty. This is just a small, necessary stretch of the journey for every mom.
My Hope for This Space
I really want to share my parenting experiences—not just the warm, glowing moments, but to honestly document the pitfalls I’ve stumbled into, the tears I’ve shed, and the “survival wisdom” I’ve scraped together in utter exhaustion.
The Goal: A Mom’s Toolkit
I hope this blog becomes a “mom’s toolkit,” filled not with vague theories, but with:
- Practical Tips: Like how to quickly figure out why a baby is crying, tried-and-true methods for dealing with clogged ducts, or how to efficiently manage the daily grind with twins (or two under two) solo.
- Pitfall Avoidance Guides: Sharing the baby products I regret buying the most, and those “game-changer” parenting hacks. Letting you know which parenting anxieties you can let go of, and which principles are worth holding onto.
- A Community for Moms: I hope my stories connect me with more moms like you. We can cheer each other on in the comments, share our own tricks, turning the storms we face alone into a journey we walk together.
The Bigger Vision
My previous career taught me to analyze data, solve problems, and optimize processes. Now, I’m applying all those skills to this new “position” of Mom. I want to prove that a mom’s value is absolutely not confined to the home. The mindset, resilience, and creativity we built in our careers can shine just as brightly—perhaps even brighter—in this more complex, long-term “project” of raising humans, and can even be transformed into a force that helps others.
My hope is simple: that every mom who opens this blog can let out a sigh of relief and say, “So it’s not just me.” Then, she can find a bit of practical info, a dose of comforting solidarity, and return to her sweet, chaotic mom-life with a little more confidence and a little less weight on her shoulders.
This road? Let’s walk it together.
Re: Vent...(Warning...sensitive subject) LONG!
have you been adopted or part of the adoption trio?? if not then i think the ignorance lies there.
Honestly, ladies, I cannot believe the responses of some of you. Of course, I know adoption is not easy. I never said it was. I do, however, believe that adoption is a smart choice for a bad decision. Also, some of you make it sound like abortion is easy. I do not think that is an easy choice either.
Nothing you will say will make me change my mind that that killing a baby is a better choice than giving that baby a chance at life. I am curious as to why you all are jumping on me. Is it because I actually admitted that I am pro-life? I was not the only one who thought adoption is a better solution...
Go Phils!!
Uh, where did my reading comprehension skills fail me? I think I was pretty dead-on.
Go Phils!!
I actually agree with you, that it is a good solution/alternative. I just don't like the idea that it is the right one for everyone. I don't want to change your mind and I respect that you are pro-life.
I am actually more upset my the heartless "cut this horrible person out of your life" wave of responses. Don't know how old OP is, but I am imaging mid-twenties, at least. I cannot imagine dropping a friend I've known for decades because of her choices that IMO, are a result of OTHER influences in her life, one being the obvious, abuse. It makes me sick. This girl AND her children need help.
DD #1 born 9/07 ** DD #2 born 7/11 ** Operation Take Back My Body has begun 10/11
Upcoming Races
Gobble Wobble 5K 11/24/11 - Abington, PA 29:40
Superbowl 10K 02/05/12 - Allentown, PA 54:28 PR!!!!
Broad Street 10 Mile Run 05/06/12 - Philadelphia, PA 1:30:44
Rock and Roll Half Marathon 09/16/12 - Philadelphia, PA
Philadelphia (Half?!?) Marathon 11/18/12 - Philadelphia, PA
DD #1 born 9/07 ** DD #2 born 7/11 ** Operation Take Back My Body has begun 10/11
Upcoming Races
Gobble Wobble 5K 11/24/11 - Abington, PA 29:40
Superbowl 10K 02/05/12 - Allentown, PA 54:28 PR!!!!
Broad Street 10 Mile Run 05/06/12 - Philadelphia, PA 1:30:44
Rock and Roll Half Marathon 09/16/12 - Philadelphia, PA
Philadelphia (Half?!?) Marathon 11/18/12 - Philadelphia, PA
DMoney will be a kickass big sister
hardly. There are many more parties privy to the intricacies of adoption than the child and both sets of parents.
Go up and read what both rvandiver and gummybear said. The people who honestly believe that all babies would have a queue of people lining up to adopt them, should the birth mother choose are either ignorant, stupid or both.
I'm not saying abortion is easier...but every time these posts come up someone ALWAYS says "there are hundreds of people wanting to adopt! how selfish" and that's just not always true. I don't think believe most women take the decision between adoption, abortion and parenting lightly at all. And I'm willing to bet most of the people screaming "cut her out" have never been the person forced to make that choice.
Eww you kind of suck at the whole friendship thing.
YWIA!
She told her boyfriend that she lost the baby instead of the truth which was that she aborted it. She said he knocked her up on purpose and that she didn't want to have another kid until she was married. In my opinion she should have went down and got BC after she had the 1st abortion especially if she already knew that she didn't want any more children until she was married. So this leads me to believe that she is irresponsible and too lazy to provide protection against getting pregnant. Anyone can buy condoms at the store-HELL they give them to you by the bag full at planned parenthood. As far as the abuse goes, it goes both ways, they are both abusive to each other-physically,emotionally and mentally. And yes, in front of the children.
Personally I don't think it degrades a damn thing...it shows what her priorities are.
Example: Crying on the phone about not having enough money to give you children a christmas yet spending $2000 on rims for baby daddys truck which he doesn't have license to drive nor insurance (but does anyways).
Example: not having enough gas or money to get gas to drive your children to school because you have a nail appt. that afternoon.
Example: not using protection when you know damn well that you wouldn't keep a baby should you conceive, instead just get an abortion FOR THE SECOND TIME!
Call me what you want- i.e. "right-winged checkbook clutcher" but you don't know how many times I have bailed this girl out financially to be slapped in the face with her poor decision making later. For the record, I was the one who drove her to her first abortion appt. I waited, took her home, cared for her for the entire night. She swore that she had made a mistake and that she was going to hell for it, that she would never do it again-and she wouldn't have had to if she were responsible and been using some sort of protection.
yep. and the more she "explains", the more and more apparent this becomes.
You always say it best.
God bless you.
Although my views on this subject are not quite as bold I have tried to give her an intervention, so to speak, and in the end she still is the one who makes her own choices, as she should. I just hope that she teaches her daughters the values of safe sex and that abortion is not a form of BC. As hard as an abortion may be emotionally it is also very hard on your body. My disapointment towards her is not that she had an abortion, as I have stated I am pro-choice, my disapointment towards her is that she chose to not protect herself after already experiencing this very same situation three years prior. The resources are there. Having a hysterectomy is a bit EXTREME...I would probably start with "tying my tubes" vs. telling my Dr. to clean me out after I am through having children!
I'm glad I don't have such judgmental, manipulative "friends."
This thread is so full of WIN.
Seriously though Gummybear is awesome. The right to choose rests with the person making the choice and quite frankly it's no one's business regarding the "why."
Ditto.
Well aren't you just wonderful? Thanks for the heads up about Jesus. Good thing I want a child, so I'm not forced into major surgery against my will.
well the way i see it, if you are willing to submit your body to major surgery (abortion) and kill a child given to you by our HOLY FATHER, then you might as well submit to a hysterectomy to save any future children from murder.
even so the child should not suffer for the sins of his father.