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Adoption
Update: Matched w/ Twin girls due 3/16
Ladies, I just wanted to update you & let you all know that our adoption plan fell through the day signing was supposed to occur. We got to spend almost 40 hours with two of the most precious little girls in the world & will not ever forget that time. We just hope & pray those little girls do not end up in CPS as they are in for a rough life. We will miss them dearly and they will always be in our hearts. One day my husband and I will look back and realize why we had to experience this but right now life just doesn't seem fair.
Thank you for all of your thoughts and prayers. What's meant to be will be and we have to move forward as difficult as it seems now.
If anyone has advice on coping with this loss, please send those over!
This discussion has been closed.
Re: Update: Matched w/ Twin girls due 3/16
I am so sorry.
Take time to mourn and heal. It's a huge loss. Unfortunately, not many people (outside of the adoption world) really get how huge of a loss it is to you. You had hopes and dreams of a future with those precious girls. If you are a person of faith, pray lots. It helps
Lifting you in prayer and sending you hugs!
We had a loss also through adoption...although the mother decided to parent about a month before birth. I grieved that loss for quite a while, probalby almost a year. Allow yourself to grieve, allow yourself to cry and allow yourself time to heal. I still think about the little boy and wonder how he is and how his mother is. I think we will always have a spot in our hearts for him.
TTC since 2005
missed miscarriage nov 2006- 4 failed clomid cycles-
3 failed femara iui cycles-
moving on to IVF oct 2011
ER nov. 7th
tansfered 2 blasts on 11/10
lots of +hpt!!
beta #1 on 11/21= 50.4
beta #2 on11/23= 90.8
another miscarriage 12/23
moving on to Round 2 of IVF with an auto immune dx
ER 4/23-retrieved 12 eggs
ET 4/28 3 transfered
Beta #1- 356
Beta #2- 870
I'm so sorry! Losing a child in this way brings terrible grief. As you know, the moment you think the baby(ies) are yours, you fall completely in love. We parented for almost three weeks before the birth father changed his mind. The only way I could explain the pain was 10x's worse than the death of my grandmother who I was extremely close with. Almost 4 months later, it still feels like a punch in the gut. To want something so badly and then have it given to you and then ripped away is unimaginable!
I wouldn't wish this on anyone. Healing does come and like you said, some day we will understand why we had to go through this, but right now, it just hurts. It's especially hard when you know the birth parents aren't living in a healthy/stable way to try to raise a child.
My prayers and heart go out to you and if you need to talk, please feel free to PM me and I'll give you my email!
I am so sorry. This is awful.
I just sent you a pm.
The adoption of our baby girl fell though after 6 months, and we still are grieving.
I am just so sorry. My prayers are with you
((((Hugs))))
Oh I am so sorry. We had a failed match that failed at the hospital. It was devastating. The best thing I did was see a counselor. She told me that it was ok to be sad and to grieve because I had lost someone. If it's something you are open to, try to find a counselor with a background in adoption. The social worker may have a list or some suggestions.
Again, so so sorry.
I am so sorry for your loss. I dont know how to cope as I had a BM change her mine but we never saw the baby. That was so hard and I can not imagine what you are going through. I keep telling myself that adoption works and this board proves it. Your baby will come.
Thoughts and prayers for you.