Pregnant after IF

My Mom passed away

My Mom passed away this morning from complications due to lung cancer.  It was kinda sudden.  She had started her chemo last week and then this past Friday had some bad side effects from it.  She was admitted to the hospital on Sunday and  had begun to turn around.  Last night around 9 or 10 she began to go downhill and there was nothing they could do for her.

The worst part is that this all happened in Buffalo about 1800 miles away.  I am completely heartbroken and I don't know what I am going to do without her.  These were to be her first grandchildren and I am so devastated that they will grow up not knowing her.  She was just so excited for them to be born and told everyone that would listen about them.

I don't think I will be able to travel for the funeral...my entire family is insisting that I stay here...that she would not want me to put the babies in jeopardy, but I feel so guilty.

Thank you for listening.

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Re: My Mom passed away

  • Oh, I am so sorry.  Big (((hugs))) to you and your family.

    I am sure your mom would have wanted you to put your and the babies' health and safety first.

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  • I'm so sorry (((hugs)))
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  • I am so sorry to hear about your mom.  I don't know what else to say.  ((HUGS))
    TTC Child #1 Sept '08, Dx: Unexplained, DOR 2 IUI's = BFN, m/c, IVF 1 = 0 embies to put back, IVF 2 = BFN, IVF 3 = cancelled, IVF 4 = BFP with 1 embie. Our son came into our life on 9/28/11. We are in love! Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
  • I'm so sorry for your loss and that you weren't able to be there.
    m/c 7/17/10
    Dx: MFI- 3% morph
    IUIs: Gonal-F + Ovidrel + b2b IUI= BFNs
    IVF with ICSI= BFP! EDD 11/25/11
    3/18- Beta #1 452! 3/20- Beta #2 1,026!! 3/27- First u/s- TWINS!
    Our twin boys arrived at 36w5d due to IUGR and a growth discordance

    FET: Medicated FET moved up to 5/23 due to ovulation
    Transferred a 6BB hatched blastocyst- genetically normal female embryo
    BFP! 5/28- 5dp6dt      
    6/1 Beta #1- 223! 6/3 Beta #2- 567!

    image

    Be kinder than necessary, for everyone you meet is fighting some kind of battle.
  • I am so sorry.  I am sure your Mom would not want you to jeopardize you or the babies right now, so I know she understands you not being there.  Can you have someone videotape it so that you can still get some closure from seeing it?  I'm so sorry.  *big hugs*
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  • I'm so sorry. My mom passed away after a long illness a few years ago. We had a wake but no funeral. I remember feeling so weak and faint I had to stay at the back of the room, I couldn't go near her or see her. I'm honestly glad my last upclose memory is sitting with her watching tv. She knows you love her, you don't have to be there in person (((HUGS)))
    1-20-09 BFP third month of Follistim IUI 02-19-09 MC 06-24-09 MC July IUI Follistim Ganirelix Ovidrel Crinone=BFN Aug. IUI Follistim Ganirelix ovidrel Crinone=BFP= scared sh**less 10-12-09 MC = 1 ectopic 1 perfect Dec. IUI Gonal-F Ganirelix Ovidrel Crinone Lovenox 01-02-10 BFP=scared sh**less again 01-06-10 CP SAIF ALWAYS WELCOME : ) March 2010 - IVF in progress converted to IUI 03-30-10 BFN April 2010 - IVF - BFFN June 2010 - IVF - BFFN July IUI BFP! March 26 2011 Gracie is here! imageImage and video hosting by TinyPic imageImage and video hosting by TinyPic
  • I am soooo sorry. Sending you and your family many T&Ps during this difficult time.
  • Oh sweetie I am so sorry for your loss.  
    Dx with PCOS and IR June 2009
    After two losses, third time was a charm.
    pm me for blog link
  • I am really sorry for your loss.
    TTC since 12/ 06: H/Azoospermia Ivf#1 BFP m/c 5w3d FET#1 c/p FET# 2 BFN IVF#2 BFFN IVF#3 March/April
  • I am so, so sorry for your loss. Thoughts and prayers with you and your family.
    TTC since November 2009. DH diagnosed with sperm antibodies. IUI #1 = BFN IUI #2 = BFN On the road to IVF.... Egg Retrieval Jan 21, 2011 16 eggs retrieved Egg transfer Jan 26, 2011 Only 2 viable eggs transferred. 1 IVF, 1 ICSI IVF #1 = BFP :-) 10/3/11 No heart beat at 38 weeks: Our baby Jack became an angel 12/14/11 = natural BFP Rainbow baby Samantha Jacklyn born8/8/12. Lilypie Angel and Memorial tickers
  • I am so sorry for your loss, I have lost a parent you give yourself time and do what is best!
  • I am so so sorry for your loss!  
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  • I am so sorry for your loss.
    Me-39, DH-45 Married 9/2/06-went of BC DX- MFI Started the IVF process 4/09 Sonohystergram - Clear HSG- All Clear 9/09-IVF=BFN 11/09-FET=BFN 3/09-IVF=BFN 5/10/10-Hysteroscopy-2 polyps removed 9/10-FET=BFN 12/10-IVF=BFP-m/c 12/28-6wks 1/20/11-Sono&Biopsy-everything looks good! 2/23/11-FET=BFP! 1st Beta-3/7=93, 2nd Beta 3/9=271, 3rd Beta 3/16= 5,719 Lilypie First Birthday tickers
  • I'm so very sorry to hear this...  Please know that you, your family, and your LOs are in my thoughts and prayers.

    Take care of yourself!  Sad

    Mr. & Mrs. ~ 09.08.07

    Lilypie Premature Baby tickers
  • I am new to the bump so you don't know me but I still wanted to say how sorry I am.
  • I am so very sorry. Sad
  • Oh sweetie I am so sorry.

    Sending lots of thoughts and prayers for you and your family during this difficult time.

    ((hugs))

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  • i am so so sorry for you loss. (((HUGS))) 

    ::PAIF/SAIF Welcome::

    TTC since July 2008
    IUI 1,2,3 BFN
    IVF #1 C/P, FET 1,2,3 BFN
    IVF#2 BFP

    it's a girl!!

    Lilypie First Birthday tickers
  • Oh Charbar!!! Condolences to you & your family!! I'm soo sorry.. May God bless you thru this time.. I'm saddened for you & your babies!!
    IVF - 9/09 - BFN! :( IVF #2 - ER 3/16; ET 3/18 with one embryo Beta 3/30 -- BFN! :( IVF #3 - 5/10 - BFN! IVF #4 - 11/10 - BFP. m/c at 6weeks :( FET #1 - 2/11 - BFP. beta on 2/21 :) Thank you God! :) u/s on 3/7 showed TWINS! u/s on 3/11 TWO heartbeats! Couldn't be happier :)
  • I'm so sorry ((HUGS))
    TTC Since 01/09
    Unexplained IF
    Clomid cycle 1-3 - BFN IUI 1-3 - BFN 
    IVF 1 - BFP 4/4/11 - It's a boy!
    FET 1 - BFP M/C 6/14
    IVF 2 - 33R/19F 12 PGS resulted in 5 normal embies
    FET 1 scheduled 12/10/14
      Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
  • Oh honey I am so sorry!!! T&P's headed your way!!
    PAIF/SAIF Always Welcome
    TTC #1 Since 3/2010 Diagnosed with POF
    6/2010-IVF #1 Cancelled after ER b/c 0 eggs recovered
    On to Donor Eggs
    9-30-10 IVF w/ DE begins & Donor started stims 10-4-10
    Donor ER 10-14-10 14 Fertilized Eggs ~ ET 10-17-10 (7 Frosties)
    IVF #1 11-18-10 M/C @ 7 Weeks~Stopped growing @ 5 Weeks
    FET #1 2-1-2011
    Beta #1 13dp3dt 2-14-2011~722
    Beta #2 15dp3dt 2-16-2011~1942
    1st U/S 3-3-2011~Twin Girls

    Lilypie Premature Baby tickers
  • Oh I am so incredibly sorry. Huge ((((((HUGS)))))) to you. Please don't feel guilty about not being able to attend the funeral. I agree with njohnson that you mom would have wanted you to do the safe thing for you and your babies. Keeping you and your family in my T&Ps, hon. I'm so sorry.
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  • I am SO sorry! I hate cancer with all of my being. I am sure your mom would want your health and that of the babies to come first and foremost. I'm sending hugs your way. :(
    6/28/10: Lost our sweet baby Addyston at 18wk 1day to pPROM 7/24/11: Michael William born at 24wk 2d due to IC after an emergent cerclage at 18wks, 4wk home BR and 2 weeks hospital BR. Grow strong our little Miracle! 9/17/11: Michael joined his sister in heaven after 8 amazing weeks with us on earth. He fought a very hard fight but NEC was too much for him in the end. Lilypie Angel and Memorial tickers Lilypie Angel and Memorial tickers Lilypie Pregnancy tickers
  • I am so sorry. I agree that you should stay put. Your mom would have understood. Huge hugs.
    PAIF and SAIF Always Welcome!
    TTC since 2007
    6 IUIs, 3 IVFs, and 2 m/c :< PCOS, Blood Clotting Disorder & MFI
    IVF #2 Aug 2011 is a BFN:<
    IVF #3 March 2012 is a BFN
    Not sure what to do now. Sad and lost.
    Lilypie Angel and Memorial tickers Lilypie Angel and Memorial tickers
  • I am so sorry for your loss.  Don't feel guilty...this is what she would of wanted you to do.  

    ((((hugs)))) 

  • I am so sorry (((HUGS))). 
    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
  • Oh sweetheart.  I am so so so sorry, just heartbroken for you.  Sending you huge hugs. 
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  • jcathjcath member

    I'm so terribly sorry.  I'm sure everyone (including your mom) will understand that you can't travel.  Would it make you feel better if someone could take a laptop and you could watch via video cam?

    I wish I had some magic words to make things better but will send virtual ((hugs)).

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  • Oh sweetie - I am SO very sorry. I'm sure you are feeling very torn amongst the sadness & pain. Sending you HUGE HUGS & praying you find some kind of comfort during this difficult time.
  • I am so very sorry.  I wish there was something I could say to comfort you.  My heart aches for you.
    Thank you TTCAL and IF board. "Friendship is born at that moment when one person says to another: What! You too? I thought I was the only one." C.S. Lewis

    Miscarried December of 2008, Ectopic Pregnancy November of 2009

    IVF #1 = BFN | IVF #2 = BFP: 9dp5dt (399), 14dp5dt (2489)

    Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus" Philippians 4:6,7
    Image and video hosting by TinyPicIn loving memory of MrsTyson's precious Julia
  • I am so very sorry ! {{{hugs}}} You and your family will be in my thoughts & prayers


    "Most of the important things in the world have been accomplished by people who have kept on trying when there seemed to be no hope at all." -- Dale Carnegie
    "Our greatest weakness lies in giving up. The most certain way to succeed is always to try just one more time." --Thomas A. Edison
  • I am sorry for your loss!  Thoughts and prayers being sent your way.
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  • I am so very sorry for your loss.  Your mom would want what is best for you and your babies.  Sending T&P's your way - and your family's way.  Hang in there. ((hugs))
  • ::hugs::

    I am so, so sorry.

    I agree - that I am certain your mom wouldnt want you to put yours of the babies lives in danger.

    Your babies will grow up to know about her - share all your wondeful memories with your children. DD has a picture of my dad in her room and she asks a lof of questions. His legacy lives on thru me. As I know your moms will thru you.

    Many thoughts and prayers for you and your family.

    TTC #2 since June '08

    ~*DD 10.21.07*~

    dx unexplained

    IUI #1-4 BFN

    IVF#1 June 2011 BFN

    IVF#2 Dec 2011

    Beta#1 12/21 : 812 Beta#2 12/23 : 1634

    EDD 8/25

    *PAIFW/SAIFW*

  • I am so sorry for your loss. {{hugs}}
    Our IVF Miracles! Lilypie Premature Baby tickers
  • OMG I am so heartbroken for you!  I even put into words the sadness that I feel for you right now.  I have lost my brother and even thinking about not being able to attend his service ...  I can't imagine the anguish and torment you are going through right now about it on top of just losing your mom.  My heart is with you girl. 

    Thoughts and prayers go out to you, your mom and your family.  May you find peace in your decision.  ((HUGS))

    TTC#2: septum removed, 2 losses, Stage 2 Endo, thin lining, slight MFI
    iui #5 2/7 + 2/8 = BFP!! 11 dpiui
    Beta #1 2/18 11dpiui= 46, Beta #2 13dpiui 150, Beta #3 16dpiui 584!!
    u/s revealed triplets! Baby B 3rd loss 8w2d. Twins! EDD 10/31/11 * c/s scheduled 10/12/11 My NEW BLOG Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
  • I am so very sorry. ((hugs))
    Infertility, Life & Loss Blog
    imageimage
    Love & luck to my 3TC girls. Congrats to Omega-The boys are here!
    If there's one thing I've learned while waiting my turn,
    it's that in each life some rain falls but you also get some sun.
    After 2 years & 2 losses, our little man arrived 8-2011.
  • My heart is breaking for you. I am so sorry. I can't imagine how you must feel. Take good care of yourself.
  • I am so, so sorry for your loss.  Big ((hugs)).  You and your family will be in my T&Ps.

    TTC in 2008. Stage II/III endo, Hashimotos hypothyroid, low morph (3%).
    2 cycles Clomid/Ovidrel/TI/Crinone=BFN.
    IUI #1 - 4 Follistim/Ovidrel/IUI/Crinone = BFN.
    IVF #1 - Antagonist w/ ICSI 4/10. 17 retrieved, 5DT of 2, BFN :(
    IVF #2 - Long Lupron w/ ICSI 6/10. 15 retrieved, 3DT of 2, BFFN!!
    Lap 7/21/10
    IVF #3 - Clomid/Antagonist w/ ICSI 10/10. 14 retreived, 3DT of 3, BFP 10/20 but m/c. No HB 11/15/10 - D&C 11/17/10.
    FET - 2 blasts, 1 survived the thaw. Transfer 2/19. Beta #1 3/1 375, Beta #2 3/3 885, Beta #3 3/8 4261, Beta #4 3/11 9005. U/S 3/8 1 sac 1 yolk, U/S 3/16 1 heartbeat 114bpm!

     

    James born Oct. 24th 2011 via c-section at 38 weeks!

    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker

    Surprise BFP - Jack born April 28, 2013 via VBAC after PTL at 33 1/2 weeks!

    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
  • I am so sorry!! (((BigHugs))) to you and you family.
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