when to tell family

kirstyn1227 · February 2011

hubby and I are debating when to tell family. I am 6 weeks 2 days along today, doctor confirmed pregnancy through a urine test and did a pap smear. we go back for an ultra sound next week to make sure the due date is correct, should we wait until then in hopes of them checking for a heartbeat or should we go ahead and break the ice? also, I need opinions on how everyone told their family

thanks!

love_melongtime · February 2011

I am only 4 weeks along and I am DYING to tell my mom and sister, but DH wont let me tell them until we are ready to 'tell the families'. It's killing me! Our families will be together on Sunday and I was thinking of giving our moms a little gift bag with a baby item in them, and having them open them. But I am wondering if I need to wait until I see the Dr. before breaking the news. I just dont know!

kirstyn1227 · February 2011

dont worry, I dont know how long to wait either! LOL! when is your doctors visit? we got the clear from the doctor, but now that I have an U/S scheduled next thursday, I almost feel like that would give me extra clearance. Let me know what you end up deciding I can use all the advice I can get its driving me insane as well

P.S. very cute with the gift bags, and sounds like perfect timing! we were thinking of telling hubbys family not this sunday but next sunday at our nieces baptism because his whole family will be there we just didnt want to "ruin her day"

wrightpair · February 2011

My DH and I decided to wait until after my first doctor's appointment (yesterday) before we tell our families. My first u/s isn't until I'm around 12 weeks and I don't think I could wait until then to tell our families especially my mum. This weekend we have family dinner with my DH's family and my family so we're telling them then.

Our families knew we've been trying and are very suspicious. We've decided to wait to tell our friends and work until I am 12w or more!

BabyRuiz · February 2011

I'm going to wait until we can see the heartbeat but I live two hours away from our family so we're going to tell them next time we go down...I should be about 8 weeks by then. It's our first child and my parents first grandbaby so we're sooo excited to tell them! I'm going to try and surprise my mom like I bought a shirt that didn't fit and ask her if she wants it and when she pulls it out it'll be a "#1 Grandma" or something like that. For his parents we're sending his mom flowers to her work with blue and pink carnations and a congrats grandma balloon. And his dad I think we're going to take them out to dinner and I'll ask the waitress to bring me ice cream with a pickle in it for dessert. lol I also liked the idea of getting the family to take a picture and instead of "say cheese" "say ____'s pregnant" I'd love to see their faces!

kirstyn1227 · February 2011

ahhh what great ideas!!! and I thought it was kind of funny that I am going in for an U/S next thursday, I am very nervous but it will probably give me a little bit of relief as long as they say everything is looking normal so far. after that, my next visit will be my 12 week appt. so i think next week at 7 weeks 3 days we are going to tell the family because chances are if I miscarried, they would know anyway. Then, we have made the decision to not let everyone else know until about 11 or 12 weeks just to be safe

msjcordova · February 2011

It depends on when you feel comfortable. We found out on Dec. 20th that I was pregnant and we decided to tell family on Christmas day.

caromartin · February 2011

We told the parents the day we found out. They all knew we had been TTC for a year and had a loss. The last time we waited to tell and ended up calling to say I was pregnant and miscarried in the same sentence. This time I want support and someone to know and care about that baby in case it still doesn't work out.

kirstyn1227 · February 2011

caromartin,

you are exactly right, and this is what I am afraid of as well. Congratulations on your baby, I hope the best for you, and you are right sometimes support is what helps the most. I did tell some very close friends, but we are trying to think of something special for both sets of parents. this is the first grandchild for my parents. also, at the same time we dont want to tell them too early, have them get too excited, and then miscarry it is such a hard thing to decide

laurasuzanne2006 · February 2011

We told my parents the day after we found out. It's really a personal choice.

OleMissBride · February 2011

I'm glad I'm not the only one DYING to tell!! I told my BFF the day i found out mainly b/c she knoews we were TTC and she's been my 'TTC advisor' asking her sister who is a midwife anonomous questions for me. Told my parents the next day and we'll tell DH's parents when we see them next. As for most friends & coworkers, we'll tell after first appt @ around 8wks depending if we get to hear a heartbeat.

I figured that if something happend and I m/c, I'd want support from our fammiles anyways...

kraeaus · February 2011

DH and I called my mom as soon as we had a positive test. I am an only child and very close with my mother, so I know that if anything happened, good or bad, I would want to share it with her. We aren't telling anyone else though until we are in the 2nd trimester.

lmjt · February 2011

I'm very close to my grandparents, and they are elderly and have become homebound, so I told them and my parents very early, to give them something to look forward to. My mom is also a cancer survivor, and since she's recovered, she hasn't been right. I try to give her something positive to think about every chance I get. I knew the news would thrill them- and it did.

Mereou12 · February 2011

This is a completely personal decision that only you and your hubby can make.

I, personally, couldn't imagine waiting even a day to tell my parents. My mom and I are extremely close, and I wouldn't have been able to keep it from her. And if, God forbid, something were to go wrong with the pregnancy, I'd NEED her support. We told both of our parents the day we got our BFPs, both times.

Others choose to wait until after an ultrasound or even after the first trimester. I don't know how they hold out, but like I said, it's a personal preference.

Soon2BMrsN · February 2011

We haven't told anyone yet. Maybe after my first appointment at 8w5d.

DGgirl · February 2011

With DS1 I think I was around 12 weeks along and we took the entire family out to dinner. With this pregnancy we are going to tell at DS1's 1st birthday. Everyone will be there that we will want to share it with.

jleigh355 · February 2011

I told my mom in the parking lot after the doctor confirmed at 5w via phone (we live far apart). I cant keep anything from my mom, she's my best friend.

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