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Toddlers: 12 - 24 Months
If you work 55+ hrs a week...
(warning: I posted a similar post in Working Moms)
How much time do you then spend with your LO? Do you feel guilty? Do you just make sure that the time you have with them is good quality time?
DH is a SAHD, and I'm working around 60 hrs a week, some at the office and some at home in order to pay the bills. If DH went back to work, his pay would just make up for daycare costs, so this is our arrangement. I LOVE my job, but I feel so guilty for working so much. I guess I just want someone to tell me that this is what they do too, and that I shouldn't feel so bad, and that lots of us have to balance family and work this way.
I feel like I'm supposed to spend a lot more time with DS than I do, but maybe I'm over thinking it. Is it enough to make sure he gets a good half day of quality time with me?
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Re: If you work 55+ hrs a week...
I only work about 45/ week and I feel bad so I get where you're coming from. But if this is what works for your family then stick with it and be proud.
Maybe you could take 1 day a month off for quality time between you & LO?
*disclaimer* First - I only work about 40 hours a week myself.
I just wanted to say that you have to do what you need to in order to support your family. I already feel like I don't spend much time with LO when I get home at night due to my 1 hour commute and his early bedtime -- but we have to pay bills. Having a SAHD is great -- at least your DS has one of his parents home with him. You should not feel guilty -- again, you have to do what you need to in order to support your family - and if you truly love your family then you will continue to do what is necesary to provide for them, right?
Good luck -- hope it gets easier - but don't feel guilty -- you are doing a great job.
I am a CPA - so I work 50-55 hrs/week Jan-April 15, then 34 hrs/week the rest of the year now that I have 2 kids. When it was just DD1, I worked 60hrs and 40hrs for the time periods I mentioned.
You do what you have to do, and yes it is OK to feel guilty - but try to make time for special alone time with your kids, too. I am so looking forward to April 16th - when I don't have to work so much, and I do shorter days during the week, and take my kids to do fun stuff (classes, park, etc).
My DH works too - so our kids are in daycare everyday. It's hard and I miss them, but we do this arrangement because its best for us.
Don't feel too guilty and enjoy all the time you get with your son
I'm a medical resident who works anywhere from 50-80 hours a week. I fight constant mom guilt. I agree with PP who say that you have to do what you have to do, both to support your family and to keep yourself sane and happy. I want to tell you not to feel guilty - but I know that won't work. All I can tell you is that it's obvious you want what is best for you and your child and you are doing that in the best way you know how. That is what makes a mother
)
Also agree that if it's an option, days off where you get to spend quality time with LO (not time where you're trying to get work done and feeling guilty because you aren't!) are really important.
Good luck mama! You are clearly a caring and loving mom... don't let the guilt overwhelm you!
There are times where I have to work 60+ hours a week. It's horrible - I constatntly feel like I'm not giving enough attention to something. However I'm doing what I need to do to make a living and give DS the best that I can.
I hope that one day he realizes this. He also loves his DCP so that makes things a little easier. Some times the guilt can be overwhelming though. Good luck!