Would you be pissed?

jamiemsmith · February 2011

So DH is staying the night with DS at his parents tonight... OOT. I stayed because my mom is still recovering from a surgery. Anyhow, he just sent me a pic of MIL giving A his first cereal!! We have put it in his bottle before, but this is the first time from a spoon. First off... we haven't been told to start cereal by the pedi yet. Secondly, I kinda want to see my son when he's doing something for the first time! Am I way of base here?

jmb527 · February 2011

Not off base IMO. I would be hurt/pissed too, eating off of a spoon for the first time is something I look forward for DD to do!

SnowflakeBride06 · February 2011

If it were me I'd be upset, that would be important to me too

JDO · February 2011

Yeah, I'd probably be pissed. But I doubt he meant to piss you off, and probably doesn't even realize he's done anything wrong, so I wouldn't be too hard on him.

KoalaBear103 · February 2011

I'd be furious. Was this something you and you DH had even discussed doing? Why would they decide to give him the cereal if your pedi hadn't given you the go ahead?

So to answer your question, YES!!

DreadLoc · February 2011

I would be super pissed. DH would have been cussed out by now, lol.

Nat2372 · February 2011

SUPER pissed.

MrsKR20 · February 2011

I'd be really pissed. This is a huge milestone for your LO and you should be there for it!!

I think this sucks big time.

srthomas88 · February 2011

Ohhh I would be furious! (and not just because I dislike my MIL). Seriously, I would have an ear full for DH and MIL.

LuvBeingMrsH · February 2011

I would be pissed too.... OMG! Indifferent

uluvfranke · February 2011

beyond pissed.I would go off a hinge.I'm soooo sorry.

haleymoriah · February 2011

You aren't out of line at all IMO! I would be mad as well. That is a huge step and definitely something I look forward to doing.

kcl22 · February 2011

I would be livid!!

uluvfranke · February 2011

also,H totally agrees, so it isn't just women.

SIMBASIM · February 2011

jamiemsmith:
So DH is staying the night with DS at his parents tonight... OOT. I stayed because my mom is still recovering from a surgery. Anyhow, he just sent me a pic of MIL giving A his first cereal!! We have put it in his bottle before, but this is the first time from a spoon. First off... we haven't been told to start cereal by the pedi yet. Secondly, I kinda want to see my son when he's doing something for the first time! Am I way of base here?

OMG! I am pissed off just reading this post! I just told my husband that sh$t better never happen. My MIL lives across the street and she is very helpful, I hope she never crosses that line!

MrsKR20 · February 2011

uluvfranke:
also,H totally agrees, so it isn't just women.

this.

JMama10 · February 2011

SO pissed. it would take me a long time to get over it. I may sound like no big deal to some but that is a HUGE milestone to me and I can't believe your DH left you out of it. It makes my blood boil for you!!!

scoutkate · February 2011

I would absolutely be pissed!

KJmashup · February 2011

No, you're most certainly not off base here. Introducing solid foods is like a rite of passage--it should be done and enjoyed first by the primary caregiver(s). Shame on her, and shame on your DH for letting her do that.

J+MS · February 2011

yep, pissed.

caprocornia · February 2011

Not off base at. all. I'd be completely pissed.

jamiemsmith · February 2011

Thanks ladies, I just didn't want to go off on him if I was overreacting. I asked why we were changing his routine now... his response: MIL says that he's not satisfied. WTH!! BM is plenty enough for him! He's a big boy, but until Pedi tells me, I wasn't planning on starting this yet! AAAHAHHHAAA! I'm so mad. I know MIL doesn't mean to make me upset, but jeez! I would at least tell the mother before I did something like this.

I just got off of the phone. He told me he was napping on the floor and they woke him up to "see what A's doing." Really, people... I know they didn't think they were doing anything wrong, and MIL is very respectful of my opinions and parenting, but I'm still pissed. DH said he spit most of it out and it was after his bottle... so they were going to overstuff him, awesome! I'm surrounded by idiots. Ugh... I need to go to bed! This is why I don't like being away from him! I was glad for the quiet today, but now, it wasn't worth it!

ETA: sorry for the run-ons, I'm a bit worked up.

kcl22 · February 2011

jamiemsmith:
Thanks ladies, I just didn't want to go off on him if I was overreacting. I asked why we were changing his routine now... his response: MIL says that he's not satisfied. WTH!! BM is plenty enough for him! He's a big boy, but until Pedi tells me, I wasn't planning on starting this yet! AAAHAHHHAAA! I'm so mad. I know MIL doesn't mean to make me upset, but jeez! I would at least tell the mother before I did something like this.
I just got off of the phone. He told me he was napping on the floor and they woke him up to "see what A's doing." Really, people... I know they didn't think they were doing anything wrong, and MIL is very respectful of my opinions and parenting, but I'm still pissed. DH said he spit most of it out and it was after his bottle... so they were going to overstuff him, awesome! I'm surrounded by idiots. Ugh... I need to go to bed! This is why I don't like being away from him! I was glad for the quiet today, but now, it wasn't worth it!
ETA: sorry for the run-ons, I'm a bit worked up.

I'm even more mad for you now. I'm sorry.

tlvhaynes · February 2011

I would be mad enough to call and tell someone off. She had her chance w/ children. I dont like my IL so Id be a B****

KJmashup · February 2011

jamiemsmith:
Thanks ladies, I just didn't want to go off on him if I was overreacting. I asked why we were changing his routine now... his response: MIL says that he's not satisfied. WTH!! BM is plenty enough for him! He's a big boy, but until Pedi tells me, I wasn't planning on starting this yet! AAAHAHHHAAA! I'm so mad. I know MIL doesn't mean to make me upset, but jeez! I would at least tell the mother before I did something like this.
I just got off of the phone. He told me he was napping on the floor and they woke him up to "see what A's doing." Really, people... I know they didn't think they were doing anything wrong, and MIL is very respectful of my opinions and parenting, but I'm still pissed. DH said he spit most of it out and it was after his bottle... so they were going to overstuff him, awesome! I'm surrounded by idiots. Ugh... I need to go to bed! This is why I don't like being away from him! I was glad for the quiet today, but now, it wasn't worth it!
ETA: sorry for the run-ons, I'm a bit worked up.

lolwut? Why?

You're worked up--with good reason to be!

srthomas88 · February 2011

jamiemsmith:

Thanks ladies, I just didn't want to go off on him if I was overreacting. I asked why we were changing his routine now... his response: MIL says that he's not satisfied. WTH!! BM is plenty enough for him! He's a big boy, but until Pedi tells me, I wasn't planning on starting this yet! AAAHAHHHAAA! I'm so mad. I know MIL doesn't mean to make me upset, but jeez! I would at least tell the mother before I did something like this.

I just got off of the phone. He told me he was napping on the floor and they woke him up to "see what A's doing." Really, people... I know they didn't think they were doing anything wrong, and MIL is very respectful of my opinions and parenting, but I'm still pissed. DH said he spit most of it out and it was after his bottle... so they were going to overstuff him, awesome! I'm surrounded by idiots. Ugh... I need to go to bed! This is why I don't like being away from him! I was glad for the quiet today, but now, it wasn't worth it!

ETA: sorry for the run-ons, I'm a bit worked up.

Honestly, if I was you, I would have a nice large glass of wine right about now!

jamiemsmith · February 2011

KJmashup:
jamiemsmith:
Thanks ladies, I just didn't want to go off on him if I was overreacting. I asked why we were changing his routine now... his response: MIL says that he's not satisfied. WTH!! BM is plenty enough for him! He's a big boy, but until Pedi tells me, I wasn't planning on starting this yet! AAAHAHHHAAA! I'm so mad. I know MIL doesn't mean to make me upset, but jeez! I would at least tell the mother before I did something like this.
I just got off of the phone. He told me he was napping on the floor and they woke him up to "see what A's doing." Really, people... I know they didn't think they were doing anything wrong, and MIL is very respectful of my opinions and parenting, but I'm still pissed. DH said he spit most of it out and it was after his bottle... so they were going to overstuff him, awesome! I'm surrounded by idiots. Ugh... I need to go to bed! This is why I don't like being away from him! I was glad for the quiet today, but now, it wasn't worth it!
ETA: sorry for the run-ons, I'm a bit worked up.
lolwut? Why?
You're worked up--with good reason to be!

I should have clarified... DH was napping... not A. That means, she decided this all on her own. She didn't even ask DH. She means well, but that's not cool. AT ALL.

Aubrianarose · February 2011

I am so pissed for you!

That is a huge step and something you should initiate...

awww... I'm so sorry, Jamie... that really blows. I would be cussing the crap out of him.

MAK06 · February 2011

I would fly off the handle!!! Seriously livid for you after reading this!! I'm sorry this happened to you

My BP is up just reading this lol. I want to find your MIL and slap her for ya

sillypit · February 2011

Uh no, I would be livid.

monimonimoni · February 2011

Oh yeah, I'd be pissed.

MrsG NC · February 2011

Definitely not cool..at all.

angelame1979 · February 2011

I would have been pissed if it was my MIL or anyone else too. My DH not so much. I tried cereal with LO today all by myself while DH was at work and he was ok with it. I took a pic for him and sent it. We have not been given the ok yet either but she seems so interested in what we are eating I decided to give it a try since we are only 2 weeks out from 6 months. I would talk to your H.

jamiemsmith · February 2011

Thanks all... it's nice to know I'm not crazy. DH's defense was that he wasn't there when DS rolled over for the first time, and I told him we couldn't control that. I was trying to come up with an analogy of how it feels. I think I'm going to go with "how would you feel if your parents took him driving for the first time without us, without really consulting us. I thought of Disney world, but that just doesn't seem as realistic. Sighs...

SnoopyLuv · February 2011

I think KJ hit it right on the head "Shame on her".

Other posters said it too, she's raised her children she doesn't get to have firsts with grandchildren. I would explain that very calmly to you H who needs to explain that to his mother, that is totally unfair to you! I would be more hurt than furious. I would hope that if any firsts happened in front of grandparents and I wasn't there that it wouldn't be mentioned until after it happened with me the first time. She is totally off base.

Unfortunately, hearing all the people who's parents keep pushing them to give cereal she probably doesn't see what the big deal is. They were giving it to little teeny babies back when we were little so it's probably normal to them. I'm so sorry you had to have this happen the right way. I know it probably also feels like she's undermining your breastfeeding. I know I get so pissed when my grandmother asks me, with the best of intentions, "Are you sure your milk is strong enough?". Thanks grandma.

Hugs!

afiyfah · February 2011

That was out of order, and I'm sorry. This is bringing back bad memories for me with regards to MIL's behavior after DD was born... I'm sure your MIL is not a bad person and she didn't mean any harm, but she should have talked to you first. I don't understand why people don't think about how they would feel before doing such things. That's taking the piss!

kspies · February 2011

Definitely pissed. As Snoopy said, you don't get to have the firsts once you're the grandparent. I'm finding that my aunts/mom are having a hard time accepting that they're a generation removed from DD and that being an aunt/mom isn't the same as being a great aunt/grandma. I think it's just taking awhile to sink in that they're old.

CherryStarburst · February 2011

What really bugs me about this is that it was completely premeditated ...she actually had to go out and buy the cereal before they got there! I can't believe how wrong all this is. I'm so sorry for you

tct1219 · February 2011

i would be pissed for several reasons: i don't want my daughter to ever have rice cereal because it's not healthy, i don't want someone else to think it's appropriate to make decisions like that for my child [especially giving solids to a <6 month old], and, like you said, i would want to be the one to do it or be there when she ate something for the first time.

NillaWafers · February 2011

Pissed? No. Hurt? Yes.

I would like to think my DH would realize that I want to be there for all his firsts, especially the ones that we introduce to him.

Verbose · February 2011

tct1219:

i would be pissed for several reasons: i don't want my daughter to ever have rice cereal because it's not healthy, i don't want someone else to think it's appropriate to make decisions like that for my child [especially giving solids to a <6 month old], and, like you said, i would want to be the one to do it or be there when she ate something for the first time.

Tct, I always agree with everything you say...

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