Anyone NOT sharing baby's name until after baby born?

hoosierbaby76 · January 2011

I had a co-worker do this when she was pg and it really upset a lot of people, but now that I'm pg with #2 I'm totally considering it. Last time I got so frustrated hearing people's thoughts, opinions and negative words about the names WE were considering. The rude comments were just... welll RUDE. We named our son Henry Hayden.. not a common name, but both are special to us after special people. My OWN mother kept saying.. "just call him Hayden Henry instead". She hated Henry and told me so on every occasion. Regardless we stuck to our guns and now, everyone agree it suits my son. People will say things like "ohh is that a family name?" or "Does your husband like that?" or "What would you actually call him/her/" or even worse... "I once knew a kid named that and he was so annoying and ugly" uggggg.....

I'm not usually the type of person that really cares what other people think but this time I wonder if it would just stop the comments.

Thoughts? Comments?

azzyberry · January 2011

We didn't tell anyone DS's name until he was born and once we decide on a name for this one, we won't be telling anyone until she is born.

melknee78 · January 2011

For DD#1 we only told immediate family the name and kept it a secret from everyone else. We did have some comments from family, his mom kept saying Elika and my mom said DD would hate us for such a long MN. We have not decided what we will do for this LO. Of course, you have to come up with a name in order to keep it secret, LOL.

JuneBug0611 · January 2011

We're sharing possibilities but we're not going to decide on a name until we see the baby. We have a couple of options for both a boy and for a girl, and we'll pick when we meet the baby. People have offered their opinions, and when they've said something negative, we've said, "Well, at least you have time to get used to it, because there's a good chance that's what it will be if it's a boy..." That generally shuts them up.

chloephoebecali · January 2011

We are not sharing. We are not finding out the sex, too, and both these things are driving people crazy. Last time we got the rudest comments from people, especially family, so we decided to keep it to ourselves this time. We didn't even have strange names. My ILs were the worst, but I remember exactly what people had to say, especially about the name we picked (before we picked it). I'd rather not know what they think.

urbanflowerpot · January 2011

This was the plan, but as soon as I found out it was a boy and someone asked me I just said it. I felt weird (personally) saying, "Ohhh nooo, we're not telling until he's born." If I had chosen to not find out the gender I could see keeping it secret easily. I was terribly worried about judgemental comments, but people have been really enthusiastic. ...and honestly I'd say something like the PP if anyone were to remark.

kers0068 · January 2011

We plan to share the sex of the baby with everyone, but we will save the name as a surprise

It should save a lot of opinion sharing.

SAHM4EVA · January 2011

we are because we do not want anyones opinion rude or not. With our first we told everyone and got not so nice comments. So this time around it is OUR business only.

Kitten80 · January 2011

we did not last time and will not this time. A lot of fam/friends have gone this route too. As you said, people feel entitled to choose your child's name, comment on every person they hated with that name, give "better" names, etc. My nephew is plain old Harry and when he was born and they told us we were all like "really?" but no one said anything because it was the baby's name...and as in your experience, we found it suited him just right. Also, for us we have fam/friends pg at the same time and we all kept it secret...something special for that day and kept from any "you took our name". If they wound up the same, then so be it

northtamarack · January 2011

We aren't sharing baby's name. When people ask, I simply say that we need to meet the baby first. It has worked well for us.

ktb31 · January 2011

Yep, keeping it a secret until after the baby is born. Made the mistake last time of telling people and realizing that I didn't want their opinions, negative or not. I don't care what anyone thinks about the names we picked so we aren't sharing. But it is driving everyone crazy. The only thing helping the fam through not finding out the sex either is that it is something they can all gamble on:)

May+Mommy+2011 · January 2011

We shared the sex of the baby with everyone, but we're keeping the name a secret just to spare the opinions.

NeverEnoughTime · January 2011

We are not telling most people (I have told my BFF and my boss and that will be it). My boss said "I dont like that name" and then tried to back track when she realized our mind was made up. That was enough for me to decide not to tell anyone else.

We are definately not telling family because my MIL is the devil.

erbear · January 2011

We're not telling family. We've asked a few friends for opinions on girl names (b/c we were between 2).

bdutton0005 · January 2011

We will not be sharing any ideas or names if we decide befpre he/she is here. Much like the others here I believe that it is our decision and don't want the comments, we get enough from some of the oher choices we have made so far.

yychx · January 2011

We had a list and only shared it with our parents. We didn't decide on a name till after DS was born. I think we'll be doing the same for this baby. Just so much easier.

erin1205 · January 2011

We didn't tell anyone for the exact reason your thinking of not telling. I was completely NOT interested in hearing everyone's opinions. I figured, once he was here and the name was attached to a baby, people would have less to say about it. We don't plan on telling with #2 either.

lynn97 · January 2011

We don't plan on telling names either. Mostly, I just don't want to hear any other opinions from people. We're team green and that's already gotten plenty of feedback, as has the fact that we plan to CD. I just don't want to hear it from anyone else.

mantle · January 2011

We didn't share with DD and we aren't going to with this baby. We don't want people 'voting' on the names we love, or telling us they don't like the names after we work so hard to decide. We went to the hospital with 2 boy and 2 girl names. DD was out 5 minutes after getting to the hospital, then between hospital staff and visitors, we weren't alone to discuss it until 11 that night (she was born at quarter to 7 that morning). She went the whole day as "Baby Girl". Some of our visitors actually asked if we could tell them the names and they'd vote one out like American Idol!

I say it is PERFECTLY fine and NORMAL to keep it to your selves until the baby arrives and you can decide for your self that the name fits your LO.

LittleD8081 · January 2011

We did not share our names for DC#1, and we are definitely keeping this baby's name a secret as well. We were Team Green with DC#1, and we picked out a girl and boy name...and kept it to ourselves. We are doing the same with this Team Green baby. Everyone HATES it...but, I would rather everyone hate NOT knowing the name than to hear what other people have to say about our choices. I get things like, "Well, what if it's a name where you haven't thought of how someone could make fun of it?" To that I say, "Believe me, kids are cruel and they will make up a way to make fun of the most beautiful name you could suggest for our baby." I also get people suggesting we use "this" name or "that" name...and to that I say, "You can name your next baby...we're going to name ours, thanks."

I have to say...I've gotten less backlash with this pregnancy, though...since they all know I am too strong in my thoughts and won't budge with a bit of "peer pressure." Plus, I think that our family and friends have grown to love the idea that I'm the only person they've known who can remain Team Green and keep secrets about their unborn child.

I say...do it if you want to. The surprise of waiting to find out if your child is a boy or a girl is a great thing for parents...and the surprise of waiting to find out the name of that little blessing is great for everyone else. It's our little way of keeping everyone else as excited as we are about "not knowing" some things about pregnancy. GL!

whew...sorry so long.

sculptress · January 2011

My mom and dad named me Stephanie when I was born and my dad's mom wouldn't have it and made them change it! So I was renamed Jennifer. My husband and I found out we are having a boy and that's all the info anyone is getting...the name is top secret. I don't want anyone's opinion and our name is unique and it's perfect for our baby. No opinions needed here. Stick out tongue

urbanflowerpot · January 2011

sculptress:
My mom and dad named me Stephanie when I was born and my dad's mom wouldn't have it and made them change it! So I was renamed Jennifer. My husband and I found out we are having a boy and that's all the info anyone is getting...the name is top secret. I don't want anyone's opinion and our name is unique and it's perfect for our baby. No opinions needed here.

Surprise

NO WAY!

(I'm a Stephanie - and totally offended - JK)

mrskeller825 · January 2011

last time we didn't share the name for just those reasons. Once they are born and you tell the name, you don't really hear it- we'll for sure do the same this time around!

Emilicious88 · January 2011

DH told his mom and sister. MIL loves our name for a girl, but SIL says it's too "white" (they're of Italian heritage, and very proud of it). She says that it would sound better with this middle name, or to use another name as a first name and don't use the first name we picked at all. And she got DH asking "What if it doesn't LOOK like a _____?" So that's really annoying. This is DH's and my baby - we can decide on a name by ourselves. When you have a baby, you can pick your own name. And if I don't like it, I'll probably lie because you do and it might actually mean something to you. I also don't want to say anything because DH's cousin is also pregnant, and I don't want a "Friends" thing happening....

justme04 · January 2011

I've only ever brought up names under consideration. Everyone has and shared their opinion. I know for a fact that my mother was not in love with DS's name but in the end knows that it is our decision....and she loves the name now.

I know when I was pregnant the first time my mother and a few friend had a "Do Not Name List" which my mother actually had the balls to type out and give me a printed copy! Then again with things like that I tend to have some balls too. Like pointing out another meaning to a name they didnt realize. Like when someone wanted to name their daughter aerola (no joke!) They just thought it was pretty and had no idea what it actually meant!

But in that case I firmly believe I helped keep them from making a HUGE naming mistake. They went with Ariel instead.

Tinky101981 · January 2011

This.

we want to save something for just us and will share her name (when we decide on one we both like) when she arrives.

bea0422 · January 2011

We told both of our parents and have asked them to keep it a secret until the baby is born. So far people are just curious and try to guess the name. It's been pretty fun. Whenever we are asked by random people (the check out lady, old lady in line at the grocery store...) I just tell them, they aren't the ones I'm wanting to surprise lol. I think it will be fun to send out the birth announcements and fully "introduce" our son

Chilz08 · January 2011

We only told immediate family DD1's name before she arrived, and we have done the same with DD2. Everyone else will be told when she is born.

FacciaBella83 · January 2011

I was going to keep it a surprise, but ppl kept bugging me, so I caved. They won't change our minds though, like it or not. We put a lot of thought into it, so we're sticking with it

MoonlitPlumeria · January 2011

In the beginning, we discussed named but I was actually disgusted by the things that people said in response to our choices. So while everyone knows that we are having a girl and they know her middle name, they will not know her first name until after the birth certificate is filled out! And no one would dare say anything about her middle name because its my moms name and my mom passed away 5 years ago!

maiziejenga · January 2011

With #1, we just told people that we hadn't decided. We got lots of suggestions that we could take or leave, but no rude comments. We'll do the same with this one. When pressed for a "come on you guys...you have to have a name..." we told them Mildred Olga. That cut off the comments for a while.

I think people get enamored with the thought that you're keeping a secret. If you just tell them you are still considering possibilities, they'll leave you alone.

tchomos · January 2011

Were not telling babies name till born either..They will know boy or girl, BUT thats it..Go for it...

hales.21 · January 2011

We're going to share the sex with everyone, but we are keeping the name a secret from everyone. We really don't care to hear other people's opinions. And we want to keep something a surprise.

TimingisEverything · January 2011

we didn't share any of our name choices last time and don't plan to this time. I don't care what other people's opinions are and this way I don't have to hear it. You'll get some crap for it but who really cares?

JasonKristen · January 2011

We aren't telling anyone our names we have picked out. My family all know that this is what we want to do so they have not bothered us. For co-workers and other friends we just say that we haven't decided on a name so the conversation doesn't go any farther than that.

Jessica0624 · January 2011

With Alex we told anyone who asked cause we were so excited.. Needless to say, we were told it was a crap name, they didnt like it, or you would get a funny face thrown at ya.. I know it shouldnt matter since WE love the name but it would really piss me off!

So this time around, I tell people we have a couple picked out but are not naming her until we see her.

I dont want to go thru that again.

croberts22 · January 2011

We have a boy name and a girl name picked out and we aren't sharing either with anyone. Right now we are getting away with just telling people we don't know yet. When that arguement wears out, we'll just tell anyone we aren't sharing names.

Neither DH or I want to deal with comments about what our plans are. This is our baby and we will name him or her what we want.

crabbypatty426 · January 2011

We didn't tell anyone last time, and we won't this time. It drives people crazy and sometimes I think we should just give up because I get sick of people asking every single time I talk to them. This time I think I might just tell people we haven't decided and see how long I can pull that off. Either way, we were happy with the decision, people were nice about his name once it was too late to try and talk us out of it, and it was sort of fun to have something else new to share when he was born.