Parenting after 35

working more (vent, whine)

Until this month, I had been working 3 days a week and am now working 4 in the office, it was my "choice" financially (not emotionally).  I know I'm lucky to have a 4 day a week gig, but honestly I would so much rather SAH (even though in my experience on maternity leave, SAH is in some ways much harder than working)!!  Unfortunately my boss won't let me work the 4th day at home on a regular basis.  I can get away w/it sometimes, but can't make it a habit. 

I miss DD SOOOOO much during the day and she's at this stage where she cries every morning when I leave.  It breaks my heart.  But, I am the primary breadwinner in our family so I had to increase my hours even though I don't like my job (lawyer).  I need to work on my resentment over this whole thing, I knew DH wasn't a big earner when I met/married him and he's so wonderful in so many ways.  Just not in the bringing in $$ department.  Will someone please tell me to just suck it up?

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Re: working more (vent, whine)

  • Ok, "Suck it up" 

    that being said, leaving a crying baby is always hard, especially going to a job that you do not like.  Perhaps on day 5 of the week, you could job hunt for something that you would like more that would pay about the same.

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  • suck it up!

    Okay, first realize that the crying is more the age than anything.  Both DD and DS got super clingy and cried at drop off.  Then were fine.  This went on and off until about 2.5 just to warn you.

    Second, yes, she is super cute now.  And adorable.  And changing so quickly.  But realize when she will really NEED you is the tween and teenage years, when kids need more guidance and supervision and can get into REAL trouble.  Why not work toward the goal of being more PT and available for that time?  That often helps me and gives me many years to work towards that goal.

    GL!


    image
    DD -- 5YO
    DS -- 3YO

  • So funny (in the ironic way). I've been told by three independent sources within the last 6 weeks to "suck it up" when it comes to my resentment about working so hard. I too have a 4-day week but those days are easily 12-14 hours long. Translated, I hardly see her for 4 days in a row. It's rotten, so rotten. So I will send you an enormous hug intstead. I know it's hard. I also know that it's not easy to find a realistic alternative. {{{{HUG}}}}
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  • imagePesky:

      But realize when she will really NEED you is the tween and teenage years, when kids need more guidance and supervision and can get into REAL trouble.  Why not work toward the goal of being more PT and available for that time?  That often helps me and gives me many years to work towards that goal.

    GL!

    This! It actually happened to me with my oldest when I was single working mother. Long story but she did get in trouble for sometime when she was around 15, and it could have ended much worse than it did.

     If it's any consolation, when my maternity leave ends in a month I will be working full time 5 days even though H is a good breadwinner. I am thinking about LO's future though, and my income may help if we decide to put them in private school. I also plan to retire early and be there for them during tween/teen years.

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  • Awww, I am sorry.  You've heard a lot of "suck it up"s so I won't add another.  Much love!
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