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Two Under 2
Are 3 LOs harder than 2?
I have a 3 year-old and a 14-month and am now 5 weeks pregnant. This has always been my plan but I am still so exhausted and in shock about how much more work two were than one that I'm a little nervous about having three little ones. I've heard from people that three is pretty much the same as having two little ones since you never have time to sleep or do anything for yourself anyway. I really want them to be close in age and I think it will be great when they are older but I'm really nervous about the next few years. .... anyone care to comment?
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Re: Are 3 LOs harder than 2?
I have 3!!! See my tickers:)
Anyway, of course it's going to be more work having 3 rather than 2 simply because you are even that more out numbered. That said, it's manageable. You won't get naps (obviously) so in that way it's the same as 2, but when all the kids are up - it's busy!!!
My advice? Find some 'adult' time every.single.day for yourself. If that means, you sit, read a book, and drink some coffee for 10mins. during the day - then do it. Don't become obsessed with finding sleep time for yourself. There's no point. If at all possible, when the new baby is here, try to take turns with your DH getting up at night....... Do you like coffee?
Do you have any questions? I could literally go on and on and on and on.....
I found 3 WAY HARDER than 2. You are outnumbered. It's a different type of logistics. It took me an entire year to not feel overwhelmed. My friends IRL say the same thing.
The only people that I know say that adding a 3rd isn't that much harder work full time or part time and/or have help (nanny, au pair, parents, IL's, etc.) I don't have any of these. I'm at home ALL DAY LONG with 3 kids. No real help around unless I hire a babysitter.
BUT, now that they are 2, 3 and 5, it's gotten MUCH MUCH EASIER.
GL!
I have to say, I am not a SAHM, I worked PT and now work FT (as of Sept 2010) due to finances, but even when I worked part time I wanted to stay home with them. I love kids and went to school to be a teacher, so maybe I'm not the "norm"
Just because I am a SAHM doesn't mean that I don't love kids and that I don't want to be with them because I feel like the transition from 2 to 3 kids is hard. Your reply could be taken the wrong way........
The poster was asking about the transition from 2 to 3 and this was my experience and the experience of my friends IRL. For some, it's easy, but I found that for most of the people that I know, their feelings are the same as mine. It's logistically very hard in the beginning to transition from 2 to 3.
OP: a few factors will come into play for you in the transition: the personalities of ALL of your kids, your personality, help, breastfeeding/bottlefeeding, how new baby is, how your children react, your perspective on things, work/not working, etc.
As the above posts illustrate - for some it's easy, for some it's hard, etc. Regardless, it's a lot of multitasking
GL!
Absolutely!
And somehow, it all works out in the end. Monkeyqueen gave some good advice about taking time for yourself. It gets much harder to do that with 3 little ones, and it's so important!
GL!
Hands down. Yes, yes, YES!
It is harder. I thought the transition to two was cake. 0-1 was the hardest, I had a hard with the transition to mommy and longed for my old life, two seemed to seal the deal and I was in full on mommy mode.
The logistics are harder. When you are alone: two hands, three kids. When you are with DH: man-on-man coverage with two and you move to zone with three. In playgrounds, play places, etc...I find myself counting them repetatively (although DS2 is usually with me). Usually, DH takes DS1 and I am with the other two. I find that we are much more divided, we divide up kids more...before I would just do it or we'd all.
I think the hardest part is that DS1 is a "runner." There is a few times when he took off. Once I had to set the other two kids behind and grab him before he went into the street. I found ways to deal with this issue. DS1 gets a lot of my attention and is expected to hold my hand when we are out/goes in shopping card/stroller. It's esp harder when you have an infant carrier to lug around.
You think you let things go when you had two kids, I think you get even more relaxed with three. It is easier in that with three, the older two can entertain each other while you tend to baby. All in all, I love my three kids and wouldn't trade them for the world even though it may have been easier if we waited longer for #3.
ETA: I work FT. Daycare is expensive for (2 plus one afterschool) and maternity leave in the winter sucked!Yes & no! I found the 3rd to be so much easier in terms of personality, so this helps a lot. My boys are oldest to youngest 3 1/2 yrs apart & love it. I am home with them too & of course have hair pulling out days. As they get older it does get easier, but I found the transition from 2 to 3 quite easy. Actually I found the transition from 0 to 1 the most difficult for our family. But in reality of course it is more work- more mouths to feed, more attention to give, more fights to break up, more baths to give. I freaked out when I was about 7 months pregnant with my third son thinking what the heck are we getting ourselves into. You will figure things out!
I'm sorry if you took it the wrong way, you had mentioned that the only people you knew that found transitioning from 2-3 was easy were working moms. I was simply adding that I was a working mom ( I posted earlier that the transition from 2-3 for me was easy) but I would have preferred to be a SAHM. I didn't say you didn't love your kids, I just mentioned that I was the type of person who would prefer to be surrounded by kids (making me feel like my "transition from 2-3" easy) even though I worked 20 hours per week.
I could read into your post saying that you feel that working moms don't think it's hard to transition because they aren't home to deal with their kids ALL DAY, but I really try not to over think things, and I'm sure that isn't how you meant it either.
I too love posts like these. I've always wanted 3 kids - still do but I have to admit it scares me.