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March 2011 Moms
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Foster frustration....vent (NBR)

eeyoreemeeyoreem member
in March 2011 Moms
I'm not really looking for advise just a place to vent. DH and I foster for a local shelter. We haven't had any animals since I got pregnant because they only had kittens and DH isn't the best at keeping the litter box clean. We recently picked up a dog who's background we don't really know and she shows signs of abuse. We have 2 dogs of our own that we raised from puppies and they did a lot of bad things while they were growing up and still do. For some reason DH has no patience with this new foster dog. She's probably around 2 yrs old but she keeps peeing in the house. We let her in the livingroom if but we have to keep a close eye on her so she doesn't pee. The rest of the time we keep her in the kitchen with baby gates. Tonight she peed on the couch and DH has flipped. I don't understand what is so different about this dog versus the other ones we've watched and our own puppies (which we were fostering at the time). She doesn't understand that she did something wrong. We don't know what the rules were where she used to live if they ever bothered to train her or not. It doesn't seem that way at least. She is also scared of DH because he's a big guy and she cowers from him, so the yelling is not helping. I'm trying to get it through to him that she doesn't understand and all she really wants/needs is a family to love her.  She will probably be gone in a week or so because she's really sweet but at the shelter she was extremely shy and would never have found a home because she never came out for anyone to meet her.  I just feel bad for her and I'm not there to temper DH from getting upset because I'm at work.
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Re: Foster frustration....vent (NBR)

  • bre87bre87
    hugs.  i don't really have any advice, i just wanted to say that you're awesome for being a furry foster mom.  i adopted my scooter and just took my mom to adopt a dog for her bday.  good luck with the new one though.
    Bre Wrties
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  • circa1978circa1978
    Yikes. I'm sure he knows this since you guys have fostered in the past, but yelling at her could also trigger submissive urination, which will only make the situation more frustrating. Poor baby girl. I'd say if he's feeling the stress of watching her by himself maybe she should be crated when you aren't home. Is she pottying there too?
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  • eeyoreemeeyoreem member
    She is not going in her crate.  I think I have determined her problem.  She is a reactionary pee-er.  When our dogs come over and take the attention away from her she reacts by peeing on something.  She seems to have some anxiety issues and needs the attention.  When the shelter writes up her bio I will make sure those things are included.  She will go outside as well so its not like she will only pee in the house.  We have not had her poop in the house yet, just pee.  I told DH to treat her like she was a puppy and keep her in the kitchen or crated when he is not going to watch her or have her outside.  I kept a very close eye on her this morning when i had her in the living room and sometimes he gets distracted and doesn't watch as closely.  I think he is comparing her to our dogs who are really good because we've spent a lot of time training them to be that way.  They are almost 1.5 yrs and other than getting overly excited when people come to visit they are usually calm and relaxed and listen really well. 
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