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I'm Just Pissed! - Having a bad moment

yeliza hyeliza h member
in Miscarriage/Pregnancy Loss

I am pissed that on the bump is the only place that I can show my true emotions!!! Everyone ask me how I am doing but they really don't want to know. They want to know that I am doing great...that I am getting better day by day. But the truth is every hour is different.

I want to talk about how I am hurting, I want to talk about her, I want to tell her I love her, I want to tell then I am scared! But when I cry in the middle of the day - they don't understand why I am crying because just this morning I was smiling.

I am pissed!

5/9/2013 = Our rainbow was born!!

08/18/2012 - BFP (Hoping this is our rainbow!)
06/24/2012 - Loss confirmed at 12 weeks
12/14/2010 - Loss baby girl at 20 weeks due to Turner Syndrome
01/2009 - Chemical Pregnancy

Lilypie Angel and Memorial tickers

My Blog

                  

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Re: I'm Just Pissed! - Having a bad moment

  • Runnergirl2242Runnergirl2242 member
    I know. I have felt this same way so many times. People really do not want to hear about it anymore. They think that I should be over it but I know exactly how far I should be. I should be inching towards my due date but no one really wants to hear about that emotion...except you ladies...I am so sorry.
    DS Born 10/05/99 DSS Born 7/11/95 BFP 05/11/10 - Missed M/C, D&C 06/23/10 BFP 8/3/2010 - Ectopic, Methotrexate 8/17/10 BFP 1/27/11- Please God let this heart beat strong. Beta1 17dpo-314 Beta2 20dpo-883 Beta3 22dpo-1861 Beta4 25dpo-5918 DS2 Born 10/07/99 "I prayed for this child, and the LORD has granted me what I asked of him. So now I give him to the LORD. For his whole life he shall be given over to the LORD." 1Sam1v24to28.
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  • CakesABakeCakesABake
    My DH and I started going to a therapist after we loss LO and it helps, but I wish that I could talk to others without them getting all dumb.
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  • Sammy-MaeSammy-Mae

    I have started lying.  I have started saying the phrase "Every day is easier. I am still sad but it's getting better."  They wouldn't understand the phrase "I never know how I am going to feel.  One day could be awesome, I am happy, I am excited and then the next day is a living hell and all I want to do is curl up in a corner and sob."  The truth would just make them uncomfortable.  

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  • fireflies0306fireflies0306

    I know-it really sucks and it has been really hard b/c my standard phrase is i'm just taking it day by day, thanks for asking, and normally i get a hug from those i know.  but i've realized people are feeling more and more uncomfortable...and i want to talk about him too, and share, and let them know there is no "getting better" (as my supervisor put it, he's glad i'm all better).  but this board has been a great support and a place for me to feel "normal" and not hide or pretend.  i even have to pretend with dh most nights b/c he is tired of hearing it.  he found me last night in the baby's room rocking with the urn of my son, crying, b/c i wanted to rock him in his room.  but i couldn't explain it so he would understand.  its okay--use this board as much as you need!!!!!!  {{{hugs}}}} 

    image Robbie's Blog
    DD #1 born 10/21/03

    DD #2 born 2/8/06

    DS no hb 11/17/10 at 21w1d, d&e 11/24,demise due to fetal hydrops, from congestive heart failure, probably caused by structural malformation

    Our Rango....BFP 2/6/11...hb on 2/23...perfectly healthy, but no hb on 6/9/11 d & e 6/15/2011
    Rango's Blog
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