How do you split night-time care for lo?

cros8380 · December 2010

Hello,

How do you and your SO split the night-time care for your LO? I am EBF, so I am the only one who can feed LO. I am also on maternity leave and DH is working, so I feel compelled to let him sleep at night while I feed, change and sooth little one. I will be going back to work in about 5 weeks, so I want DH to be able to care for LO at night too.

Just wanted to see what your doing and ask for recommendations. LO has a co-sleeper in our room, but on the fussy nights, she has been sleeping in our bed with us.

TIA!

LemonBlush · December 2010

I EBF so it's all me at night! There's no point in waking DH up when I already have to be up. However, DD usually stays up for 1 1/2 hours after her middle of the night feeding (b/w 3 & 4 a.m) so once I go back to work I will feed her then hand her off to DH so I can get some sleep.

JDO · December 2010

I BF so I've always done the night feedings, but the rare occasion I asked DH to get up and give a bottle of pumped BM he did it without complaint. Now that DS has been STTN and I'm back to work I think I'll be more likely to ask DH to do this if DS happens to wake up.

ImMrsMoses · December 2010

First, I have to say that I FF so feeding was never an issue. Also, she is not sleeping through the night yet. but she is getting close.

That being said, I got up with DD all the time in the beginning of my maternity leave. When that started to be hard, DH got up the first time she got up so he could still get a good amount of sleep before having to go to work.

Now that we are both at work, I stay up to put LO down while DH goes to sleep. Then he gets up with her between 1 and 3 and then I get up the next time or when she gets up for the day.

kcl22 · December 2010

When LO wakes up to eat I wake SO (who could sleep through anything). SO gets up and changes LO while I get settled to nurse. I also EBF so once LO is changed and eating SO goes back to sleep since there's not much he can do besides keep me company. Which I usually don't want in the middle of the night!

chach916 · December 2010

I will pump a bottle and go to bed early. DH will feed DS right before he goes to bed. Then I'll take the rest of the feedings.

Or, if you don't want to use a bottle, you can have DH be in charge of getting up and changing diaper and then bringing LO to you to feed. We've done that before too.

Rach7170 · December 2010

My SO works 3rd shift, so its always me Sad

AverysMom1118 · December 2010

In the first week of us being home, DH would get her up, change her and hand her to me after I got settled in my rocking chair ready to nurse. After that week, I realized that there was no point in making him wake up throughout the night just to change her diaper when I had to be up anyways. LO is usually up for the day between 6 and 6:30 so on the weekends, after I feed her, he'll take her downstairs and let me sleep until she's ready to eat again.

SpartanChick88 · December 2010

Dh has a crazy schedule and will get up with DD whenever he doesn't have to be up early. He will change her and give her a bottle. He will also take her if she's super fussy and I'm overtired and getting frustrated (which doesn't happen much now that I've gotten to know her cries).

KJmashup · December 2010

Due to a serious medical condition, we were pretty much forced into FFing LO. That being said, DH assumes most, if not all, night duties. And he works days full-time. I love him so.

bmqcmg · December 2010

I started off BFing my LO and I would do all night time feedings/wake-ups. I am now FFing and back to work and I still do all night time feedings/wake-ups. I will ask my SO to get up on the weekends sometimes if I am tired and having a hard time getting up with my LO, but that doesn't happen very often.

cros8380 · December 2010

Thank you to everyone who responded- these were VERY helpful!

amandalawless · December 2010

Night Duty is all me now. If DH is at home and in the bed I'll wake him and tell him that I'm going to heat the bottle (FF) and then he drifts right back off to sleep. But now Em sleeps till about 4 -5 in the morning so it's not bad. The most DH has done at night was the first night at the hospital where I could not get up and move to easily (emergency csection). Then the next night I could move better and LO got a tummy ache so I let DH sleep if he could so I could deal with LO. But now it's all me as soon as I get home from work at around 6. So from 6 pm - about 7:45ish am

insertclevername · December 2010

I EP and supplement with formula. I take care of all of the nighttime feedings since I have to get up to pump whenever LO eats and I want DH rested for work. If DH is up for the first night feeding he will change LO, feed him the bottle and soothe him while I pump. Also when DH gets home from work he pretty much takes over care of LO until we go to bed.

drewiekc · December 2010

DD usually STTN, but if she happens to wake up, I do any nighttime feedings without getting DH up. When she was a bit younger and waking up more, DH would get up and change her before I fed her. But now since she's only up one time at the most, it's just as quick and easy for me to get up and change her myself before I feed her.

In the beginning when I was seriously sleep deprived from her needing to eat every 2-3 hours round the clock, I would go to bed early and DH would stay up with her and give her a bottle of BM before coming to bed. That would at least give me a good 4-5 hour stretch of sleep.

m&m2006 · December 2010

i feel bad now! i BF but pump enough every day to have one bottle feeding. if dh doesn't work a night shift or a day shift the following day, he will take one feeding. i usually stay up with LO until 10pm or 12am (depending) and do that feeding. then, i hand her off to DH, who takes the next feeding with a bottle. he usually wakes me up anywhere from 4:30-7, and then i take care of her until 10pm-12am of the following day.

Arielle27 · December 2010

We don't. I breastfeed and we bottle feed when necessary / convenient (i.e. if we have an event to go to and I have to dress up in non-breastfeeding friendly clothes, or if I am out and DS is hungry when he's with DH), so I get up to feed DS and DH tries to sleep. He has to go to work in the morning, so what would be the point of him being up with us? I can always nap in the day.

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