- Pregnancy
- Baby & Toddler
- Parents
- Getting Pregnant
- Baby Names
- Product Reviews
-
Registry
- Community
-
More
Want a personalized experience?
Download the free app
Babies: 0 - 3 Months
Crystal318
member
tell me about your DH
Crystal318
member
Mine is lazy! he just lays on the couch and if the baby is fussy he doesnt try different things he just thinks the baby is supposed to lay there and be happy with him. he burps him for like 30 secs and if it doesnt work, oh well. he doesnt realize babies need attention. he never just bonds with him. he acts like its a chore. it pisses me off so bad! we had another couple come over with their 8 week old the other night - same age as mine - and the dad knew everything about the baby...,..bathtime, feedings, what makes him happy, cutting nails, etc. it made me so jealous and mad. i have had a million talks with him and he changes for like 2 days and then goes back to laziness!!! he slept until 230 this afternoon. its so unfair!
Warning
No formatter is installed for the format bbhtml
This discussion has been closed.
Re: tell me about your DH
lol this.
lol. yeah, this
if it's "so unfair" then why don't you tell your DH to grow up and start acting like a father and take care of LO.
you want me to tell you about my DH? he does everything that i do for LO just as much as i do. he changes her, feeds her, burps her, plays with her, gets up with her in the middle of the night, soothes her when she is fussy... etc. he is a dad.
you didnt once ask for advice in your op. and you asked for us to tell you about our DH's... thats what i did. however, like i said in my pp - you need to tell him all of this!! tell him its time to grow up and take care of his child... thats your advice!
Look into PPD for dads. It can happen. I'm not saying this is the situation, but it is worth researching. I HIGHLY suggest counseling since it is obvious he has some issues here regarding how everything has changed since having a baby.
But just a suggestion: Use proper grammar and punctuation. You'll be taken a bit more seriously if you do. Such as spelling out the word "you" instead of "u".
How often do you leave LO alone with DH? You should be able to bargain for one or two evenings a week of "me" time (even if you're spending it at home doing chores) where you husband is responsible for caring for LO solo. It could be that he doesn't do things because he just hasn't had to. Also, don't criticize ANYTHING he does for the baby (unless it puts LO in real danger, of course), let him put the diaper on backwards, etc. He'll learn eventually and won't feel emasculated by critiques.
If your H still is having trouble caring for the baby, go to counseling, without him if he won't go. It's possible he's having some ppd- guys get it too-- or maybe there's something else in your marriage that is causing this.
Yes, or a "Come to Jesus" meeting.
Unable to even.
********************
You don't understand the appeal of Benedict Cumberbatch / think he's fug / don't know who he is? WATCH SHERLOCK. Until you do, your negative opinion of him will not be taken seriously.
Some men just don't bond with baby until they are more interactive. Have you talked to your DH about your expectations and the way you feel? The sleeping all day is not cool- unless he is working all night. It's only fair that you have a partner in this- and tell him you understand the baby isn't interactive or very "interesting" just yet, but s/he still needs his daddy.
Also, you may be doing this already, but be sure you actively include DH in baby's care. Tell him to bathe the baby. Tell him the baby needs to be changed. Make sure he knows when dr. appts are and ask him to come. Ask him to dress baby (and don't make a face, no matter what outfit he puts the baby in- just roll with it.)
My DH is a good dad, hell, I didn't even change a diaper until we got home from the hospital (we were there 5 days due to complications). He does get up to check on DS at night, but I do the feedings, so there isn't really any use to both of us being up. He snuggles with him and takes him when he gets home from work so I can get a few things done, rest, shower, etc.
He doesn't do everything the exact way I'd like for him to, but he tries, and he puts forth a lot of effort, and that is good enough for me.