Hello! My story — The Bump

Hello! My story

Hi all, I just recently stumbled on this board and have been very inspired by all of you.  I have two kids- DD is two, and I had a wonderful birthing experience with her.  So, I assumed of course that DS, who was born in September, would be the same.  Wrong!  I went into labor a few days before his due date and started bleeding profusely, which the Dr.'s felt was the beginning of an abruption.  Because of my blood loss, the doctor was not comfortable letting me continue to labor for my own safety, and said he would need to do a c/s.  THEN the anesthesiologist came and because of my blood loss, I had to be put under general anesthesia.  all happened within about a 10 minute time span, I was out of my room, in the OR, and asleep.  My husband was not allowed in the OR.  The baby and I were both fine in the end, but the experience was terrifying and I had some depression initially dealing with the fact that I had missed the birth of my child.  No one was there when he was born.  (I did not have an abruption, by the way, it was the start of an infection in my amneotic fluid that caused my bleeding).

I do absolutely believe that the Doctor who delivered me made the right decisions about my labor and birth, and was concerned with my safety, but I am so disappointed in what happened.  He did talk to me afterward in the hospital about the possibility of another vaginal delivery, which at least made me feel better.  I thought I would be "done" after having my second child, but now I feel that I need to try to "get back" the experience that I lost with DS by trying for a VBAC with a third child.  

It has made me feel so much better to read the stories and thoughts on this board, b/c I think that my family and friends don't understand and I feel selfish to talk about how I feel, since we were all okay.  

Thanks for reading this long post! 

Re: Hello! My story

  • I completely understand your disappointment.  I have one LO and another on the way, and your birth story with #2 is very similar to mine.  I also had to be put under general anesthesia for an emergency c/s and my DH was not allowed in the room.  We also both missed out on our DS's birth and it is nothing short of heartbreaking.  I still have a hard time with it, I don't think it's something you ever truly get over.  I'm glad you found this board though, it's truly a great support system.

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  • Welcome to the board and thank you for sharing your birth story with us.  :)

    I didn't have my c/s under general anesthesia but I also had a lot of negative feelings after it.  I know exactly what you mean about wanting a VBAC to try and get back the birth you didn't get last time.  It took me a while to feel relatively at peace with how my daughter's birth went and I hope you can feel that way about your c/s too.  



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  • I totally get you!  I had a c-sec under general due to complications from pre-eclampsia/HELLPS!  It almost broke my heart & took me a while to get over it!  I don't think it something that someone who hasn't had a unplanned for C-section can really understand.  My mother/MIL/friends with kids all told me how lucky I was but I needed to get over it & be happy with what I had.  They were right in a way & I was/still am very grateful but there was that part of me that really felt I missed out! 

    I am not even pregnant.  We are currently ttc & I remain so hopeful that I can have a VBAC on the next one!  I have a feeling I will be making a lot of friends on this board - what a great reasource Smile


  • I totally understand the feelings of dissapointment.  I think it is totally normal.  Welcome!
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