Just wanted to take a quick pull and see who everyone has decided to allow into the delivery room during labor and during your birth.
This is my first pregnancy (25 weeks along) and I've always though that I would have close family and my DH allowed in the delivery room during labor, but then when it's time for the pushing - push everyone but DH out the door. But now that I'm actually pregnant I'm not sure if I want my mom or MIL there as well.
Did any of you moms decide to include other people besides DH in the delivery room, and if so how did it go? Just wondering if anyone can share their own thoughts and feelings on this subject.
Thanks girls!
Re: Who's going to be in your delivery room?
DH's family will not be allowed in the room until after the baby is born. My mom and sister will be in there (if they choose) up until pushing.
it will be the baby's father and my mother. At first i didn't want my mom in there while pushing, but now, i think she will be a big comfort for me.
I don't plan on having anyone else at the hospital at all, untill after the birth.
DH and medical staff only.
We're hoping to not call family until after the baby is born. I am very close with my mom, but have no desire whatsoever to have her in the delivery room. I want a few hours with DH and our new baby after she's born before we get mobbed, also.
It will just be DH and I. Just like you, I always thought that I'd have my mom and grandmother in there during the whole thing. Now, I don't want anyone except DH and the staff. I want a few special moments after delivery too just for DH and I. I think the more real this becomes, the more I realize that DH, LO, and I are now a family. That we have a special bond that no one else has.
I will say, DH was a little ticked when he found out that I didn't want anyone else in there. He thought that his DAD would be in there for delivery! I just busted out laughing at this. DH has a HUGE family. 8 brothers and sisters, Dad and mom. He expects them all to be in the waiting room and be able to see LO immediately after delivery. Not gonna happen! They can wait just a little bit.
With my DS I had my younger sister and DH in with me. I had planned to kick my sister out when I was pushing, but I didn't really care that she was there.
This time I will have my older sister (possibly younger also) and DH with me. I'm really close with my sisters though, and my DH loves them as if they were his real sisters, so it worked really well for us.
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Bwahahaha! Was he really serious?! That's great. Ummm no honey, I only want one male in your family knowing what my hoo-ha looks like and since you already do your dad's out. LOL.
The more I think about it, I think I want my mother there, although I am torn becuase I want it to be a special moment for me and my fiance. My mom had both me and my brother through C-Section, so she didn't experience natural birth (she tried with me, but since I was in distress they had to do an emergency c-section. Back then I don't think they did VBAC's, so they scheduled when my brother was born.). Plus this is her first grandchild...I don't really know. I'll probably just let her and my dad in while laboring and have them leave when I push, but I might change my mind last minute about letting my mom stay in there.
Original plan: Just my husband
What actually happened: My Husband, Mom, Dad, younger brother and MIL
I was out of my mind and I didn't have it in me to kick them out, they were all so excited. The nurse was pushing me to keep them there saying, "They aren't looking at you, they're concentrating on the baby" BS like that.
Anyway they all stayed. I just watched the birth video for the first time two nights ago...and I was horrified at what they witnessed. Next time around it just me and my husband...no wiggling room with that. They're out of the room for the pushing.
I feel the same way completely. I am hoping to go without meds and don't want anyone there while I am dealing with the pain. Then I especially don't want anyone else there looking at my lady parts while I am pushing.
This has been a big discussion for us - I lost my mom when I was very young so my step mom will be in there with DH and I and if my little sister would like to stay (she will be finishing nursing school) I am happy. My dh gets very nervous when I am in pain, so I need extra support. i am hoping this is a special time for all of us if she is there.
DD2: February 2014
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I didn't want anyone there other than DH with DD#1. For some reason, I felt like it would put pressure on me. Also, I wanted to have some time with the baby after she was born without others around. I have absolutely no regrets.
For LO#2, it will just be DH again since I'm having a scheduled c-section. We'll invite in-laws to come over after the baby is born and once we have a bit of time with him/her.
just dh.
we are not even going to tell anyone i am in labor until the baby is out and we have had some time alone with her.
with my last pregnancy i made it clear that i didnt want anyone in the delivery room. I told family and i told hospital staff and lo and behold my mom and MIL kept sneaking in "to check on me". MIL asked me for a hug in the middle of a contraction and I yelled at her to GTFO. I was pissed
With DS:
While in labor: DH, my mom, dad, sisters(2), MIL, FIL, Gpa, Gma, and a few close friends... I loved having everyone around to keep my mind off the pain ( no epi)
When it came time to push:
It was DH , my mom, MIL, and Gma. I wouldnt have it any other way. They were all such a great support team for me and they gave us alone time with DS right after he was born also!
Amen
With my first I had my mom, my ex-boyfriend/"The father" and my ex's mom in the delivery room... the rule for the hospital was supposed to be 2 support people max but my doctors told me as long as they weren't in the way or anything I could have as many people as I was comfortable with. I was 19, my boyfriend was an ***, and there was no way my mom wasn't going to be in the room.
This time if I'm limited to only 2 people it will be my boyfriend and SFIL. I offered the extra space to MIL since it's her first grandchild and my mom was there for my first son, but she suggested (if I was okay with it) that SFIL would LOVE to be there and that it would mean a lot to him because he doesn't have any biological children of his own, and she's been through birth and such three times herself. If there are no limits I'd be cool with my mom and MIL being there too if they'd like. I love putting my vag on display apparently.
Avery - March 16, 2011
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Having a homebirth. DH, midwives and best friend (I was her doula, she will be mine). Anyone else would stress me out and cause me to lose my focus. I don't want anyone visiting maybe even until the next day so likely won't call parents/inlaws until way after the fact. I want our little family to adjust to one another before the parents try to take over.
It will just be FI and myself with the medical team of course.
I learnt my lesson previously with allowing friends and MIL in and it was just way too much. I want something private and meaningful this time round, and hopefully I will make it to the hospital unlike last time.. lol..