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1st Trimester
deathslilplaymate
member
Need to break the news.(kinda long)
deathslilplaymate
member
Okay, I just recently found out that I'm pregnant and it is a bit of a shock. I'm only 18 and my boyfriend is 19. (Yes, I know, we're young.) We're not exactly ready, but we know that we do have time to figure things out. But, we do know that we have to tell our parents. I'm extremely afraid to tell mine, because I was raised being told that wemon who get pregnant before marraige are sluts, and that if I got pregnant before I was married that they would kick me out of the house. (Yes, We both still live with our parents.) And with my boyfriends parents, he doesn't want to tell them because they had him when they were our age. I was hoping that someone might have some advice as to how to tell them, because I really can't think of a way that will be okay. Thanks 
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Re: Need to break the news.(kinda long)
im is a somewhat similar situation, im not as young but im unmarried and liv with my parents, actually my fianc and i both live with them. i am unemployed and uninsured! eekk! im SSSOOOO nervous to tell my mother in fear that she will kick us out. we have planned not to tell till i findout weather or not i will be accepted for pregnany medicaid, that way they see that we are being responsiable about this and understand howmuch of and impact it will have on EVERYONE in the house. financially i know it will be way hard but you have to have faith thateverything will work out.
maybe you could write a letter to them or the 2 of you take them out to dinner dot break the news!
Two days ago you posted that he wanted you to have an abortion. Does he still feel this way? If he does, why is he still your bf?
Do you know where you're going to go if/ when your parents kick you out?
Look, it's going to be a hard conversation, but you're 18 and about to become a mother. If you're going to have this baby you're going to have to grow up really fast and this conversation is just the start of that. You know they're not going to be happy about this, and I can't say I would be either in their position.
If you can't handle telling your parents, how are you going to handle all of the things that come along with motherhood? Have you seriously explored your other options?
All of this is of course assuming I didn't waste my time on MUD.
You're in that shittastic living situation and TTC? What a winner
ETA: Oh, you're already KU. Ticker comprehension fail on my part.
I still think its disgusting
FFS- why in the hell were you trying to get pregnant!?!?! You have no home, no job and no insurance and were actively trying to bring a baby into your mess, that is the complete fvcking opposite of responsible.
It's going to have a huge effect on everyone living in that house and you are crazy if you think otherwise. You will be getting exactly what you deserve if your mother kicks you out.
Trying to conceive while unemployed and uninsured, while living with your parents, is NOT being responsible at all. I don't know where you got the idea that you're somehow "being responsiable" [sic].
DD born 07/2011 DD due 11/18/2013
Its the demon version of a weeble wobble. Duh
oh, I was thinking 'small boy' in a Jamaican accent.
I suppose it could be interchangeable. Now, I have a mental image of a tiny man in dreads.
LOL, win.
Uh, no they don't. Holy crap, this thread is just full of winners. I would have marched my azz straight down to Planned Parenthood at that age.
Look into adoption, seriously.
There are thousands and thousands of couples that would be happy to take care of this child and to leave you with the opportunity to experience a real future. You could go to college, earn a degree, learn what it's like to earn a living and develop a career, and in ten or so years, marry the love of your life and create a family together - one you can afford to take care of and will enjoy having, not one that you are being pushed/forced into having by circumstance, that will create resentment, and that will probably end badly.
Think about it. Be a responsible mother and think about it.
1) I think we need to strongly suggest to The Bump gods to add a spell check in the posting. And maybe they could somehow ban the word "preggo"
2) When I was in college and only made a couple thousand dollars a year, I qualified for free birth control. Why don't more people check into this?? I realize it's not 100% effective, but seriously people, it's called responsibility....
BFP 10/25/10 Brynn Helen born 7/7/11
Wow, what is with all the judgmental people on this thread? The girl came her for advice, maybe a little anonymous support, not to be ragged on by sanctimonious women who have nothing better to do than look down on someone because of the way their lives are going. God forbid something like that happens to your children! Telling these girls that they are irresponsible is the EXACT OPPOSITE of helpful! You don't know the whole story, and neither do I, so STFU. Maybe if you were in their shoes you wouldn't be such prissy b*tches. As if you've never made a mistake in your life!
To everyone else, sorry for the rant. I have a hard time listening to hypocrites.
amen
I think if you're going to have this baby and choose to raise it as well, you're going to have to grow up RIGHT NOW. Get a job, get a place to live and remember that everything you do from NOW ON is for that baby and not for yourself. Remember that a baby isn't a doll or a toy, it's an actual human being that will require food, love, support, parenting....and will cry, get sick, cost a lot of money, change your life and be very demanding.
Just remember, don't be selfish. And like other posters have suggested, consider adoption, there are a lot of couples out there ready and able to provide a loving, supporting and financially stable home for your baby.
My mistakes???
Oh, you mean like that time I had a party and my parents had to get ALL of their carpets professionally cleaned??
Or when I got my tongue pierced?
No, you probably mean the time I forgot to pay the water bill and the water got turned off while my H was in the shower?! Plenty of money, I just forgot!
Did you mean those mistakes?
Because I've never made a mistake that brought an innocent baby into a sh*itty situation!
BFP #2 10/17/2010, Blighted Ovum 11/16/2010, natural miscarriage 12/03/2010.
Dx with MTHFR 01/2011 with 2 A1298C mutations.
BFP #3 03/06/2011 Chem. M/C 03/16/11
BFP #4 01/05/2012, Please come out and meet us in September!
Wow, I guess you lead a charmed life. You did just prove my point though. You've never been through it, so why are you spouting off? Do you have a vested interest in this woman and her pregnancy? Is she your child? Will this affect your life? DH's life? Other family members?
No?
That's what I thought.
You should get off your high horse, I bet it's lonely there all by yourself.
I wasn't blessed with a charmed life. I worked for it!! I finished highschool. I graduated college, I got a job, I stayed on the pill, I dated guys with degrees, I got married before I got pregnant!
This life is not something that was handed to me!!
Thanks for the unsolicited grammar lesson.
i guess your hormones are getting to you!!!
no one said i was trying it happened and im dealing with it, period end of story. as for my use of fertility friend i live a natural toxin free lifestyle and the use of spermicide hormonal BCP methods other than the awarness method are unsuitable to me. i temp and chart in order to know my body and know when to avoid. ofcourse its not 100% effective but that goes for everything other than not having sex.
and FYI i had a job and insurance up until just a few months ago howver i was a victem of cutbacks, and as for living with my fiance AND my parents you have no idea we moved in with them so keep your estrogen pumped @$$ shut!
do me a favor and when you pop you kid out show him/her Bambi, and watch it with them obviously you have something to learn from it! this girl is haveing a hard im sure its comforting to know that you arnt the only one out there that is freaking out. i am actually very positive about my situation and believe that everything happens for a reason!
*Mod edited for violation of TOS*
Um...you're unemployed, uninsured and live with your parents, and you feel sorry for MY baby?
Oh, and by the way, I clicked on your chart, and it said "Lets See What Happens..." over the ticker, which certainly gives the impression that you planned it.
DD born 07/2011 DD due 11/18/2013
I'm not saying that she shouldn't, nor am I trying to minimize her situation. But being *** slapped by all of you isn't necessarily helpful, or kind, or whatever. This seems to be falling on deaf ears anyway... I hope the young lady makes the right decision for HER, not based on bitchy comments from an internet thread.
hmm....when I click on your screen name and see some of your previous posts, I seem to see posts going back several months indicating you were TTC, not TTA.
Do you know what a hypocrite is? Because unless any of these women who are upset (and let's remember that they're mostly annoyed with the Disney-whoever more than the OP) tried to get pregnant though unemployed, uninsured, and living with their parents, they're not being hypocritical. They're being annoyed, and harsh, and rightly so.
Having a baby is an expensive decision. If you can't afford rent, or insurance, you shouldn't be TRYING to have a baby. More, if you're relying on your parents to support you, you shouldn't be TRYING to have a baby.
Sure, things happen and people get pregnant unexpectedly but that's a whole different story than what Ms. Disney is telling.
You are awesome!
Congratulations on your pregnancy! Sorry some of the "hormones" on this thread aren't giving advice that you asked for. You said, "We're not exactly ready, but we know that we do have time to figure things out" . Focus on that feeling - that you will figure things out. I'm 31 and some of my friends with babies (that are my age) have lost their jobs or sure they're married, but unhappily. You ARE an adult, don't let your parents make you feel like a "slut" or that you are stupid. Mistakes and pregnancies happen. Whats done is done. If all pregnancies were planned, half of these people judging you wouldn't be here on this thread right now!
You have a new life to worry about, not your parents' reaction. They will get over it. This is their grandchild. Go to them with a set plan (finances, childcare, etc) not just the news that you are pregnant. Good luck to you.
What does that have to do with anything? I didn't say life was handed to you, I implied that you must not have had to deal with the hardships that many others face on a day to day basis. That makes you lucky... Why is that so wrong?
For the record, I HAVE dealt with many hardships in my life, yet still managed to get a degree, a career, a wonderful husband and two properties, all by myself with hard work. Why do you think that is such a huge accomplishment? In some ways it is I guess, but in most ways, it's just how I live my life. I don't think I'm all that and a bag of chips because I didn't get pregnant before I got married. Big deal!
Great advice!
Liar.
A quick google search of your posts proves that you were indeed trying, and not just because most of your posts were on TRYING to Get Pregnant. People who aren't TTC don't generally ask where to get a certain type of pre-seed or say that they're hoping the spotting they had the night before was implantation spotting.