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S/O Saving for DC

ShanJosh777ShanJosh777 member
in Babies: 0 - 3 Months

DH and I are in disagreement about this.  We got some monetary gifts for our shower and when DS was born, which I used to open a savings account for DS.  Also any gifts he gets for birthdays, Christmas, etc will go in there until he is old enough to actually need money for anything.  Even then we will try to instill in him to save half/spend half.

In addition, I want to start regularly contributing to his savings account, not necessarily only for college, but just for him to have a little nest egg for a house down payment, travel, or really anything he wants when he is old enough.  DH thinks this is ridiculous because we didn't have any such "nest egg" and everything we have we earned for ourselves.  I can kind of see where he is coming from, but I just think, don't you want your kids to be better off than you?  We are still paying my student loans and will be for a while.  I would love it if we could help DS out someday, kind of like, surprise here is X amount of money to help you get started.

What are your thoughts?

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Re: S/O Saving for DC

  • akiernanakiernan

    We're going to put away anywhere from $50 - $100 a month in DC's savings account.  Whatever we can afford that month. 

    I don't care that DH and I never had that from our parents.  We choose to provide that option for our children because we can. 


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  • Erin Mary AckermanErin Mary Ackerman member

    Your DH is right.  You have to max fund your own retirement first, and your emergency fund.  This is before any and all savings for your DC.

    You have to put on your own oxygen mask before you assist your child.  Same idea with this.

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  • ABMcKinneyABMcKinney
    Yup... we will be doing this. I also plan on making some investments in his name, although I will be waiting for the market to settle down a little first.
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  • Amrice78Amrice78
    I'm of two minds on this.  I don't think I'll take all of his birthday/Christmas money away and put it into an account because I don't think that's nice to do to a child, I will let him spend it on a gift (this is, of course, after he's old enough to know that he got money in the first place).  We do have a 529 account for him to help out with college, but I'm not going to bend over backwards to save extra money for him to get started after college because I think starting at the "beginning" is good for people.  It helps them appreciate hard work and shows them the rewards of paying their own way.
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  • NewlywednOhioNewlywednOhio
    Both myself and my DH never had a nest egg either. We were told "If you want something-- earn it." In a way, this taught me responsibility. But, at the same time, there were many circumstances where a nest egg could have helped me tremendously (college for example). So...DH and I decided to set aside about $50 a month for now, and then when DH graduates from college and gets a bigger job, we will invest about $200 a month.
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  • JustMarried2005JustMarried2005

    If you have your 401(k) maxed out, and a solid emergency fund, then I don't see anything wrong with your plan.  If you don't have those taken care of, I would take care of them before I planned down payment or travel funds for my kids.

    We personally are not saving for down payments, etc for our kids.  We are choosing to max our 401(k) out to the best of our ability, and then pay off our mortgage.  By the time our kids are down with high school, our mortgage should be paid off and we will have extra $$ each month to spend on them if we wish to.  I prefer to make sure all of our bases are covered before I worry about doing anything beyond the basics for our kids.

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  • auslyn804auslyn804
    DH grew up that money he got for gifts, half he could spend, the other half was saved.  We actually got good use out of that money when we started out.  He also had his college totally paid for, my parents helped me so we have my leftover student loans.  I definitely want to help my children with school but not at the cost of my retirement so I don't expect to be able to pay for the whole thing.  We will start a savings, and contribute regularly, but it probably won't be a ton.
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  • chalmettechalmette
    Ditto Brahim - he's not going to support YOU when you retire with nothing.
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  • Kristin&AdamKristin&Adam

    My parents did start an account for me when I was younger, but they never had very much to put in it.  When I went to college, it was enough to cover the cost of my dorms that my scholarship didn't cover with a bit left over.  Once I graduated and was in the process of buying a house, my parents gave me the money to use as a downpayment.. I didn't even know there was still money left, I was shocked and extremely grateful. 

     We opened an account for DS and are contributing a bit to it every month, I figure it will be there to help with college, buying a car, his wedding.. all things that we would help with anyway.

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  • mrsjennimrsjenni member
    We're opening a 529 account for him to help with college.  That's about it.
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  • Zoink2008Zoink2008

    I built a savings acct for him already that is a good size. He know has almost 2k in there. I won't be able to contribute to it further but any money he gets for holidays/birthdays goes in there - no questions asked. Cash/checks go in and not spent on crappy toys that won't last. I do this with my stepdaughters too.

     

    I won't contribute monthly to it as we just don't have the money for that.

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  • secuccarosecuccaro

    My parents have helped my brother and I a lot, and so have DH's parents with him and his sisters.  If you have enough money, why not set aside some for your DC?

    We have our retirement accounts maxed and we are saving in a 529 plan for DS. I hope that we can also save more in the future to help DS with a house.

    I might add though that I also think it is important to be self-reliant and take responsibility.  My parents helped us with a house and with our wedding, but not with "superficial" things like cars, trips, etc.  It was pretty clear during childhood that my parents didnt value things like that and if I wanted fancy clothes, extras, I needed to get them myself. 

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  • wishin&hopin2008wishin&hopin2008 member
    I agree with your initial thinking.  We used the money from my shower for things we needed to DS, but once he was born any money he gets goes into an account.  We put in $50 a month into his account.  My parents did do this for me and it was wonderful when we bought our house.
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