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Pregnant after a Loss
I am having a hard time.....
Gianna was up today crying from about 3:30 until I handed her off to DH at 9:30. It wasn't non stop but there was nothing I could do to soothe her. We nursed repeatedly, I shooshed and swaddled. I don't think she is getting anything from my boobs anymore. I finally gave in and gave her 2 oz. of formula and she gobbled it up like she had never eaten before. We have a pediatrician's appt. tomorrow but I feel like a horrible Mother. Yesterday, things were great and today they just went to crap.
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Re: I am having a hard time.....
Hey! How are you? COngrats on the birth of your DD. I highly recommend getting the Happiest Baby on the block DVD from Dr. Harvey Karp...it talks about ways to sooth a crying baby.
Try not to supplement. Your milk is still establishing and you can really screw up your supply if you supplement. I did that and really regret it. It's very rare that women don't produce enough milk. My situation was a bit different, because Alex couldn't latch, so we had no choice but to supplement but I ended up with a low supply as a result, even though I pumped.
It's also very common that after a few days of being calm/quiet, they start a crying period. We were warned at the hospital that Alex won't be sleeping as much as at the hospital and expect crying.
I suspect she gobbled up the formula becuase of her instinct to suck, which really relaxes babies. WOuld you be willing to introduce a paci? I know it's not recommended until BF is established, but maybe it would help.
Do you have a swing? The swing is a GOD sent for most people, the motion seems to knock them out. The video also shows this giggle technique, which you do along with swaddling, and shooshing that knocks them out. You can also try going for a car ride or stroller ride.
Honestly, try to get the video, we got it a bit late, but it helped us quite a bit and many nesties rave about it on the 0-6 board.
Hang in there, the beginning is very hard. YOu are adjusting, the baby is adjusting. You are doing the best you can. .
Every day is different. Hang in there. There were days were it seemed all little Ben would do is cry and want to eat, but then seem hungry again an hour later.
The best thing for me was to realize that all I needed to worry about was taking care of him, even if that meant sitting in the chair all evening and nursing and then walking him around the house (that realization took way too long).
Don't feel bad. Remember, Gianna's tummy is still tiny. All that's important is a happy mom and baby. I hope your pediatrician can give you some good info and reassurance that you're doing a great job!
You did exactly the right thing. I had to supplement as well. My DD was STARVING. Literally. She had lost over 8% of her birth weight. She was suffering & though I feared she'd choose the bottle over me if I offered it, I knew I couldn't stand another moment of her suffering like that. The miracle was that once I introduced formula, she calmed down & is now the absolute perfect baby. I started pumping right away & it took a day or two for my milk to really come in, but it did. For a few weeks we fed her both. Breast first then formula to make sure she got everything she needed. Gradually she started to dislike formula. Now, she will take breast milk straight from the source, or from a bottle, but she gets mad if we offer formula.
If you'd like more specifics, or just want to talk, email me. cddinkc at hotmail
Hang in there. I promise, it does get better!
Like the others said, you're not a horrible mother. The beginning is so hard. I had a similar experience with an inconsolable, hungry baby once we came home from the hospital...I cried right along with her.
We've had to supplement...Kate gets half formula, actually. She was losing too much weight. I don't make enough milk and she can't BF effectively (I pump)...we can't find a reason for either and it's not the norm. Please don't beat yourself up for supplementing with formula because your baby was hungry--you did the right thing.