Infertility

Hi, its been a while!

Ive had a lot go on within the last year so I have been MIA lately. I actually divorced this year. I actually still want to become pregnant and that brings me to an opinion I would love to get from you ladies. Im still going to pursue ivf with a donor. All of my friends are supportive except for one. She feels its wrong to have a child on purpose that will not have a father in his or her life. What do you think? I know that I will be a good mother on my own.
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Re: Hi, its been a while!

  • I say, it is your life and if you feel like you can do it on your own, more power to you!!!!!!!  As long as you have the family support in place in case you do need some help, I say go for it!

    I personally am not a strong enough person to pull it off, and there is no way I could do it with my job. 

    Good luck to you whatever you decide to do!

    Our Blog - http://thedittemores.blogspot.com/
    Dx PCOS 2003/high fasting insulin/clotting issues DH Dx with low sperm count, motility and morphology. Varicocele repair (11/1/2010)
    2/2011 - Confirmed no improvement - On to Donor Sperm
    4 failed IUIs in 2010
    IUI#5 and 6- with DS, BFN
    Final IUI - Lucky #7! IUI with DS - 20.Jun.2011 - 21.5 mil motile! Not so lucky - BFFN and the end of our IF journey....
    Waiting for our family to be complete through Adoption - May 2012 - Hoping our baby finds us soon!
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  • Why not!  If you have the support and the means to be a single parent, I say go for it.  Good luck!  

    My favorite thing about spring are the flowers. Image and video hosting by TinyPic

    Image and video hosting by TinyPic
    TTC #1 since Oct 2006 with severe MFI.
    Summer/Fall 2011 - DH on clomid. Helped with morphology and motility, but count still under 1 million.
    February 2011 - First RE appointment to discuss options.
    March 2011 - We aren't sure what we are going to do right now. DH isn't sure about DS.
    ~SAIFW~
  • I appreciate your encouragement! I have a wonderful mother and a network of friends that could not be any better! I also have a lot of great males in my life that my child could learn from. Of course I wish my child could have a father, but I don't want my ability to become a mother to be dependant on finding Mr. Right at this time.
    image.
  • If you are comfortable with it, then that is all that matters. If the doubts that your friend has are hitting home, then you might want to think some more. I think though, that when you are ready, you are ready!


    image


    Married 07/17/2010
    Diagnosed with PCOS 10/20/2010 
    TTC since Oct 2010 
    BFP #1 March 31st 2011 Due December 10 2011 
    Missed m/c discovered June 2nd 2011 at 12w4d
    D&C scheduled June 7th 2011 at 13w2d
    Found out our baby boy had Triploidy XXY through embryopathology
    BFP #2 September 28th 2011 Due June 8th 2012
    Missed m/c discovered November 20th 2011 at 11w2d
    D&C November 29th 2011 at 12w4d
    Found out our baby girl had Monosomy X through embryopathology
    BFP #3 April 24th 2012 Due January 5th 2013
    Betas falling on 04/26/12 Chemical Pregnancy
    RPL testing done, multi nodular goiters on thyroid discovered.

    BFP #4 November 22nd 2012, Due August 5th 2013
    Betas: 17 @ 9dpo, 62 @ 11dpo, 124 @ 12dpo, 321 @ 14dpo 720 @ 16dpo 13,805 @ 23 dpo 
    First ultrasound at 6w3d, hb 122 bpm. 
    Second ultrasound at 7w3d hb 143 bpm 
    Third ultrasound at 10w1d hb 167-170 bpm 
    Forth ultrasound 12w1d hb 167 bpm 
    Graduated rpl program, moving on to regular ob! 
    It's a boy! 

    Little man was born August 1st 2013, 7lbs 8oz and 20.5 inches long



  • Personally, I see absolutely nothing wrong with it. I was raised by a single mom from the time I was a year old...so I remember nothing else. I think I turned out ok :)  Honestly, I think I'm much more independent for it, too. As long as you have some sort of support system, I'm sure you'll do a wonderful job! Good luck!
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  • Welcome back...(sorry you have to come here..) :)

    I say more power to you.  I told my parents before I met DH to know that if I wasn't with someone by age 35, I would pursue adoption by myself.   

    I see nothing wrong with wanting to become a mother - no matter who you share it with!  I have a friend who has a beautiful 3 yr old boy who she conceived using donor sperm and IVF.  She is a wonderful mom, has a great support system, and I've never heard her say anything to indicate that she doesn't love being his mother.

     A while back, there was a study published about the parenting styles of parents who had struggled with IF. I wish I could find it or knew where I read it.  Basically, it said that those who found SAIF were more likely to be less neurotic and happier, with better adjusted children..... 

    So, basically, you would already be a few steps ahead of all of the other mommies. :)

    You can do it!

  • I was actually on that same path not too long ago.  I went through a divorce and was climbing in age and single.  I had great support from friends and family.  I felt that I needed a better paying job before going down that path, so I ended up in Houston for a great work opportunity.  While here, I actually reconnected with my first love from college.  He knew about my family plan, but wanted me to give us a chance - so we dated and were married last year.  

    Funny thing, when I was planning this on my own, I really thought I would just need donor sperm.  As it turns out, I am probably going to need donor eggs now!

    Good luck! 

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