Is TTC right after a m/c ok?

kayserea · October 2010

My husband and I just went through a "blighted ovum" miscarriage, otherwise known as a "missed miscarriage". Where the sac developed but not fetus. It was very hard for us, but we are strong and got through it together. We want to start trying again right away. I have just stopped bleeding and am just waiting for my hcg levels to drop to zero. My doctor's nurse recommends that we wait til I have at least 1 regular period, but I have done some research and am confused on something... some say its really not a problem if I conceive right after a miscarriage (before having a period). Anyone been in this situation or know someone who has been?

Hyfagal · October 2010

I'm very sorry for that heartache. This is a ? for your OB though. Many have differing thoughts on when you should TTC again for both physical and emotional reasons.

Molluskwrangler · October 2010

Personally, I would just do as my docs office advised.

SarahTx5701 · October 2010

I would visit the miscarriage/pregnancy loss board. All boards are listed on the left.

Sorry for your loss.

Scout05 · October 2010

I am so sorry for your loss. You need to speak with the doctor themself, and I will always recommend following their advice. It is for your health, and the health of a future pregnancy.

I was told I did not have to wait after our early second loss. I became pregnant before AF. I lost our little boy at 8 weeks, 3 days to Trisomy 16. I will never not wonder if I had just waited, if it would have been different.

You need to ask yourself if you can handle the emotional result of not waiting as advised, if another loss were to occur.

I can tell you that guilt on top of grief is a terrible thing. And I would have avoided it if I had just waited one lousy month. It's one month. It's just not that long.

kabarbanel · October 2010

Sorry to hear about your loss. I had a chemical pregnancy before DS. I was told to wait 1 cycle, and most people I know are told to wait 2. I however started TTC again right away, because I had known someone who got pg right away after a m/c and it was fine. I got pg with DS 3 months later, and my OB told me it was a good thing that it took a few months because if you get pg too quickly after m/c, it can cause another m/c or other problems. GL!

locash · October 2010

I'm very sorry for your loss. I agree to do as your doctor advised. It's just one month.

After our missed m/c (found at 10 weeks), we were told to wait until a period then we could try again. We tried for 2 months before realizing we weren't quite as okay with the loss as we thought. It felt so desperate. So we took a couple months off to refocus and then got pregnant once we started trying again.

I know those months were immeasurably beneficial for us emotionally and I'm certain my body benefited from waiting.

Good luck and hang in there...

AppleRidge · October 2010

I'd do as your doctor says. I had an early loss last winter and conceived again the cycle right after. Unfortunately, I lost that pregnancy, too. Like Ambrandau above, I wish I had waited so I wouldn't have had something else to feel guilty about. Also, I really do think that having a m/c takes a lot out of the lining of the uterus, so that the chance of an early loss is greater if you get pregnant again before a normal cycle.

leneae10 · October 2010

I'm sorry for your loss, but definitely listen to your Doc.

about*that · October 2010

I would listen to your OB & their nurse more than a bunch of internet strangers. After both my m/c's, my OB said to wait at least 2 cycles. Honestly, as much as I wanted to try again as soon as possible, I was in a much better place emotionally after a couple of cycles than if we hadn't had waited. The emotional healing is different for everyone. I knew I wanted to try again so bad, so I put it in DH's hands. We started trying again after he thought I was in a better place.

*sallymad* · October 2010

I'm so sorry for your lose : (

My doctor told us to wait 6 months after my m/c, so I'd probably ask your doctor to see what they prefer.

kapereasd · October 2010

I think that is a decision for you and your hubby to make...I am seeing a lot of comments about waiting until you are ready and I think there is a lot of validity to that.

I had a m/c at 8 weeks last spring and my OB told me it was ok to TTC again after one regular cycle...but I never got that cycle because I got pg. again while we were waiting for it. I didn't plan it that way, we were not trying, and to be honest, it caused me a lot of stress. I would have rather had that first regular cycle first to be sure that everything was ok. I spent the next 12 weeks or so holding my breath every time I went to the bathroom hoping there wasn't blood (I might have done this anyway after a m/c, but I definitely felt more worried about it seeing as how it had *just* happened). Also, there was a lot more emotional stress in that I wasn't sure how well my body had healed and how well it would carry another baby. I have been lucky and everything is going well, but it has definitely been more stressful than when I was pregnant with my two sons years ago.

My advice is to be absolutely sure you are emotionally ready before pressing on. Physically it may not matter, but I definitely felt the strain from not waiting. Best of luck to you and I will be eager to hear when you have successfully conceived again!

virginiagirl11 · October 2010

I'm very sorry for your m/c.

My DH and I did a lot of research on this after my early natural miscarriage this summer. Based on our research, there don't appear to be any studies suggesting that a woman is more likely to m/c if she tries again right away after an early natural m/c. Unless your medical provider has a specific medical reason for their recommendation, often the rec's to wait are for emotional healing and dating purposes (easier to date a pg. if you can use last period).

My m/w recommended waiting a cycle after an early m/c to allow for emotional healing. However, DH and I found that the one thing that helped us heal more than anything was taking back control of our lives and our future. I felt strong and healthy right away and had several negative HPT's. At that point, I wanted nothing more than to move forward.

We were fortunate to get pg right away and I have had an absolutely textbook pregnancy so far. It has been wonderful. Because I was tracking my ovulation, I was able to tell the Dr.'s office how far along I probably was. I was only a day off their u/s measurements.

Ultimately, if you are cleared health-wise, I think trying again is really up to how you feel emotionally. Best of luck with what you decide.

KyleTrigger · October 2010

My experience was similar to locash's. We started TTC right after my m/c and we were not successful for several months. At that point we realized that it didn't feel right and we were putting way too much pressure on ourselves.

Plus every single person we knew would ask us monthy if I was pregnant, which was devestating every time I had to say no. Finally we stopped "trying" and got pregnant the next cycle. I think it got really hard on my FI because he felt so much pressure to perform, if you know what I mean, and he thought it really took all the fun out of it.

I am sorry for your loss. Just try to remember that in the long run of conceiving and carrying the child to term, a few months really is not that long. Good Luck.

mrsfrates · October 2010

I had a blighted ovum in April of this year and got pregnant again in June. Emotionally I couldn't wait for one regular cycle, But I have PCOS and haven't had a period since August 2009 so thats why we didnt wait. Dont give up hope, it will happen!

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