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June 2011 Moms
Sad. Excuse the vent. WWYD?
I just discovered via facebook that a childhood friend of mine who lives in the same city as me (due in Dec.) has chosen a name for her baby girl - the same name I've had chosen for years! So strange as it's a rare name (#917 according to Name Voyager, but it's one of those vintage, traditional names), though clearly gaining in popularity. We don't see each other much, except for the occasional lunch, but our daughters will go to the same camp and if this LO is a girl, they would likely be in the same cabin, grade, etc.
I don't want to give up this name as it's honoring my grandmother, who is still living and I am very close with. I doubt they would go to the same school/preschool, but the fact that they could be in the same cabin at camp dissuades me from it slightly. I also don't want her to think I stole it - it took some convincing to get DH on board with it, and now he loves it, and I was so deflated when I saw that this is what this girl has chosen too! WWYD? I'd like to take her to lunch and explain it maybe? We aren't close, but my being PG may put us in more similar circles since she is already a mom. Ugh. I know it's a ways off, and this LO could be a boy, but I'm already sad about it!
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Re: Sad. Excuse the vent. WWYD?
"but the fact that they could be in the same cabin at camp dissuades me from it slightly. "
Really?! I'm sorry, but I don't understand the problem. Just name the child what you want. Sounds like you don't even talk to this person. And there's no problem with two children having the same name. I mean how many Jessica's, Michelle's, Melissa's, Katie's, Mike's, John's, etc do you know?
I would go ahead and name your LO (if you do have a girl) that name. It doesn't seem like you guys are that close so I don't see why it would cause a problem. I also wouldn't go through the process of taking her to lunch and explaining the situation. If she ever did ask (which I doubt she would) just tell her it is after your grandma.
I'm curious - what is the name? If you don't mind sharing.
This exactly. Name your child what you want.
Ditto. I don't see the problem. Other moms that you don't know might also use the name. Its not a big deal, if you like it, use it.
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Wow, sorry, I guess I didn't expect you all to not understand why I was a little disappointed, but thank you for the decisive feedback! She is the type of person who I think would believe I got the idea from her, because it is still fairly rare. If it were an "Elizabeth" name, I wouldn't hesitate, but this gave me pause since it's not one you hear as often. She's not in my close circle, but I've known her since childhood, and since I only have about 3 mom friends total, she may quickly become someone I see more of if we have LOs the same age. I was just a little crushed when I saw that this fairly unique name we'd for sure decided on had been already chosen by someone who is having a baby around the same age, and who will grow up in similar circles or doing similar activities - even if she and I are never close. Also, our LN is so ubiquitous I'd hoped to keep the FN one that she could have as her own.
So silly to worry about I guess since I don't even know yet if she is a she! Definitely if this one is a boy, and the next one a g, I won't worry about it.
FWIW, DH agrees with all of you that we should use it, and I should not even bother explaining it to her. I guess I hope she nicknames hers, because I'm not planning to
.
I can see where you are coming from . I had 2 names picked out for girls that I love. And then I discovered my husbands cousin named her daughter my second choice. I wouldn't be so concerned and use it anyway, but my husband didn't like the idea. I am going to keep working on him. We will never live by these family members, but the rest of the siblings are really close to the cousin. Several have said not to use it, but I will use it if I want to! I just have to get hubby on board (if this is a girl).
Paula, that stinks! If you love it, I say use it. FWIW, my dad's name is the same as his first cousin's, and while they don't live near each other, anytime the whole family is together they are still (now in their 50s) called "Big John (older)" and "Little John (younger)" - not sure what your dynamic is like but just something to think about
. You could always use a NN to distinguish...or something?