Questions about hand me downs/borrowing things....

VTbride05 · September 2010

My sister in law and I have boys that are 7 months apart. She is always offering us clothes to borrow and I rarely take her up on it because we have a lot of clothes and I fear that we will ruin something that she loves. She also gave us two pairs of shoes. Well we have beat the hell out of the shoes. Nice Nike sneakers that DS wears everyday. I feel like I cant give them back b/c they are so beat up.

Now it was never clear if we were to keep these things, or borrow them. All of the clothes we have ever borrowed I have given back. I emailed her and told her that they are pretty beat and she said not to worry about it (they just had a baby girl, probably wont have more kids...).

Same SIL also offered DS his cousin's winter gear which would be SO helpful to us. It's nice LLBean gear that she said was worn once. I am nervous to borrow it and use it too much. We play outside daily even in the winter.

So it's clear that I need to have a conversation with SIL about what is borrowed, what is ours to keep. But what are your thoughts about loaning things out, or giving them away?

the_jackpot · September 2010

I never loan things out, I always just give them away. If there is something that I really like or want for my future yet to be born/thought of/ created child then I keep them.

Brewtowngrl · September 2010

I loan things out with the understanding that somethings will not get returned because they will get ruined.

lmdbww · September 2010

I dont have anyone to loan it to so I just sell it right as she outgrows it.

My sister gives me all of my niece's outgrown clothes but she doesn't want them back. I get rid of everything that I dont like, and whatever DD wears and outgrows I sell for my sister on ebay and give her the cash.

momtoRaegan041008 · September 2010

My boss gives me all of her daughter's outgrown clothes. I am under the understanding that they are given to me and they are mine to do whatever with. I did loan my maternity clothes to a close friend, but she was under the understanding that I wanted them back. You only wear them for a year or so anyway. She ended up outgrowing them, and barely worn them. I wouldn't have been upset if something would have happened to them. Things happen. I don't think she would have given you the shoes and clothes if she didn't want your child to wear them. I would just ask her if she wants the clothes/shoes back, or does she want you to pass them on to someone else or donate them.

Lisichka · September 2010

I usually don't loan Sasha's clothes out: I keep the stuff that I really like and pass the stuff I'm not crazy about down (or donate it to salvation army). So I personally don't expect anything back. When I get hand-me-downs, I ask if i should return them when Sasha outgrows them, usually I'm told to do whatever with them. I'd talk to your SIL and make sure witth her what she wants back and what she doesn't.