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If there is anything that having tttc has taught me...

Ya Never KnowYa Never Know member
in Trouble TTC

it's that I will be able to know what not to say to a person who is trying to get pregnant. I will know how to be supportive and how to understand what a person is feeling, and I will know what situations not to drag someone in to. 

This post was going to be about this morning's date with a friend and her baby that turned in to her last-minute invite of another friend and her friend's baby... which turned in to them talking about their children for 2 hours, then deciding that they were going to go baby shopping, so they'd see me later. But you know what? I'm exhausted. I'm sick of talking about babies, about pcos, about waiting, about IF, about how unfair life is.. so I'm just not going to.

Let's just suffice it to say that whatever happened today, I will learn from, and when I'm a mother, I will make every effort to remember all the things that I have been through, so that I never have to make my friends feel the way that my friends made me feel today. 

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Re: If there is anything that having tttc has taught me...

  • beth0874beth0874
    Amen!  ((hugs))  Sorry about your crappy morning.
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  • gui's galgui's gal member

    This sounds like a good first draft of an article for the New York Times!!! It made me tear up...mainly because of your heartfelt and genuine tone.

    Thanks for sharing your experience, as I have been in a few too many of them myself...and they make me feel so alone. I'm in the Junior League in my local town...and I find it hard to go to the general meetings, for this very reason.

     

     

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  • abvernonabvernon

    Amen sista!

    Sorry about how your friends made you feel. How craptastic.

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  • JKGymnastJKGymnast member

    Well said! Seriously... I know there are several lists out there of "things that you should never say to someone TTC/TTTC", but apparently that list was never forwarded to your friend.  Grrr...

    You have a great outlook on things.  ((hugs))

     

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  • petite chouettepetite chouette member
    ((Huge hugs)) and I am right there with you!
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    4 Clomid cycles + 3 IUIs w/ injectables + 1 IVF = 1 m/c, 1 ectopic
    FET May 2011 = BFP! Beta 1 (8dp5dt): 336, Beta 2 (12dp5dt): 2033, Beta 3 (14dp5dt): 4706

    ? So thankful for our little guys, born at 33 weeks. ?
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  • mharisonmharison
    Sorry you had a crappy morning, but you have a great outlook. All of our friends have kids, and they know we are having trouble, and yet they go on and on about how easy it is to get PG and their kids. It's drives me nuts, but I've learned to just walk away and do something nice with DH.
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  • TallteachfromNJTallteachfromNJ
    Remember too, ttc will not last forever.  It is just a short time in your whole lifetime of years....Your friends were not very kind to you and you were right to cancel.  Next time, try to change the subject or make plans with someone who is in the same married without children/and/or have a boyfriend situation.
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  • Ms H13Ms H13 member
    What a wonderful outlook!  Thank you so much for sharing.
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  • mrs.conanananmrs.conananan
    This is my famile right know.  My mom wants me to take my grandmother shopping for my sister/her baby.  Yah, no.  Not doing it, especially since my Grams doesn't know that we are TTC, let alone TTTC.  Not even going there!
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  • gymnst1013gymnst1013 member

    Absolutely - I couldn't agree more.  It really gives you some perspective.

    (((hugs)))

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  • zookbridezookbride member

    ::applauds:: This is very true, and while we might not get the comfort we need from our friends, it is good to know that we will know how to give that comfort to someone in the future who may need it.


    New to 3T? Check out this website first:
    TroubleTTC

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    Every new beginning comes from some other beginning's end --Semisonic

    **TTC since 04/09, C/P 02/02/10; 4 weeks, 3 days**
    **Dx: Anovulation, Hypothryroidism, Mild Endo, Pituitary Adenoma (prolactin issues), PAI-1, MFI **

    **7/10: Clomid + TI= BFN**
    **3/2/11: 1st RE appointment**
    **DH= Morph= 2%, Motility= 30%**
    **HSG= All clear!!**
    **3/11: Femara + Pregnyl + TI= BFN**
    **5/17/11: Laparoscopy / hysteroscopy = mild endo**
    **7/11: Novarel + IUI #1= BFN (7mil, 75% motility, 2% morph)**
    **8/11: Femara + Novarel + IUI #2= BFN (11mil, 35% motility, 1% morph)**
    **11/11: Femara + Novarel + IUI #3= BFN (9mil, 2% morph)**
    **Jan 2012: Follistim (75ius) + IUI #4= CANCELLED due to cyst -put on bcp**
    **Feb 2012: Follistim (75ius) + Novarel + IUI #4.2= BFFN (2.5mil, 13% motility, 1% morph)**
    **Mar 2012: Follistim (100ius) + IUI #5= CANCELLED due to 35mm & 14mm cysts**
    **On med break indefinitely...IF Sucks!**

    **Jan 2013: Follistim (100ius) + IUI #5.2= CANCELLED due to high prolactin level, MRI scheduled, pituitary adenoma found, put on Dostinex**
    **Mar 2013: Follistim (100ius) + IUI #5.3= CANCELLED due to uterine polyp, surgery scheduled for polypectomy and D&C**
    **03/22/13: Hysteroscopy, polypectomy and D&C**
    **May 2013: Finally got to start a cycle!!! Follistim (100ius) + IUI #5.4 = BFFN (6mil, 74% motility, 2% morph)** 

    **Jun 2013: Decide to start IVF**
    IVF w/ICSI #1 (Long Lupron Protocol)
    06/26/13: Start BCPs
    07/02/13: HSG #2= all clear
    07/15/13: Start Lupron 10 ius
    07/25/13: Suppression check
    07/28/13: Start stims (225IUs Follistim + 75IUs Menopur) drop to 5 IUs Lupron
    08/01/13: Monitoring: 12 follicles all about 10mm, E2- 313
    08/04/13: Monitoring: 18 follicles (15mm, 13mm, a few 11mm, rest 10mm or below) E2- 1,505
    Start Augmentin- antibiotic prep
    08/06/13: Monitoring: 13 follicles (18mm, 17mm, rest b/w 15mm-16mm!) Ready to trigger!! E2- 2,248
    08/08/13: ER-- 14R, 13M, 10F 
    08/11/13: One fertilized late, we now have 11 embryos!
    08/13/13: 5dt-- 2 blasts (Sheldon and Penny) 3AA and 3BB, none to freeze
    8/23/13: BFFN... Sheldon and Penny didn't stick**

    **8/29/13: Follow up... bad fragmentation issues. Changing protocol to Antagonist for round #2 coming soon! Also started on 81mg Aspirin after getting blood panel done and found out I have PAI-1**

    **Oct 2013: After large cysts, finally starting IVF #2**
    IVF w/ICSI #2 (Antagonist Protocol)
    BCPs started back in Sept due to cysts
    10/27/13: Start stims (225 IUs Gonal-F + 75 IUs Menopur)
    11/03/13 - 11/05/13: Add Ganirelix to the mix
    11/06/13: 3 follicles at 18mm-- Ready to trigger!
    11/08/13: ER-- 17R, 13M, 8F
    11/13/13: 5dt-- 2 blasts (Luke and Leia) 5AB and 4AB, 1 frostie
    11/20/13- 11/23/13: light positives on FRERs and Wondofos
    11/22/13: BFN per RE office (under HCG of 10)
    11/27/13: CP ::sigh::

    *12/03/13: Follow up...great response and quality this time, was given 50% chance of it working, just didn't stick. Great plan for 2014! 

    **Jan 2014: Last IVF of our SRP**
    IVF w/ICSI, freeze all, then FET
    12/27/13: Start BCPs
    01/19/14: Stims (375 IUs Gonal-F + 75 IUs Menopur)

    Congratulations Cutebride!! --TWINS!! Congratulations, Luvie, on your sweet boy! Congrats, Jess! So happy for you ladies! <3<3  
    ~~Also best of luck to Kati, illinigal, and youngin!~~

    *S/PAIFW*

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