Ferber Method with Twins?

Times2 · August 2010

any MOM'S on this board? We are ferberizing one twin but im curious if any moms of multiples did their twins together or seperate?? the ferber seems to be working with the one twin but when we add the other one im afraid we might have to start all over again...

macchiatto · August 2010

We did HSHHC with both boys at the same time. I think in general, it's probably easier to do sleep training with both at once (barring special circumstances). If necessary, you can separate your twins until you get sleep issues sorted out. Are they in the same room now? Also, the HSHHC author wrote a book called "Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Twins." It's a quick read but might be very helpful.

Good luck!

gumiberg · August 2010

we didnt ferber per say, but when we had sleep issues we separated our twins to work on them. Are your twins ID or frat? I have heard ID twins do a better job at sleeping through each other cries...mine are frat (obviously) and do not sleep well through each other's crying.

We left ours separated since they do sleep better that way.

Times2 · August 2010

they are fraternal ...one was waking in the middle of the night consistently to the point where when we would go check on her she would scream until we took her out of the crib..the other twin is a much better sleeper...so we have been ferberizing one twin and waiting to put the other in the crib until after she falls asleep...im just worried that once we finish with her the other one will scream & we will have to start all over again..

i wish our house was bigger but for now they both have to share a room.. Sad

macchiatto · August 2010

We live in a 2-bedroom house so my frats have to share a room. With many twins it can work so if that's your only option, I wouldn't be discouraged. Many MoMs have found that their LOs learn to sleep through each other's cries for the most part so I think it's definitely worth trying.

Times2 · August 2010

I am hoping they will..I guess I will find out soon since we will try to do the other twin starting this wknd..hopefully she will sleep through the other twins crying..if not i guess we will have to let them CIO..

I guess its our fault since we started a bad habit of letting them fall asleep in our arms ...now we have to break the habit...I dont want them to be 2 yrs old and STILL need to fall asleep in our arms!

macchiatto · August 2010

I'm impressed you made it this long! I don't understand logistically how people do that with twins; how do you do it when you're alone with both of them? My boys don't usually totally settle down/get soothed if I am holding both of them at the same time, so we've been putting them down drowsy but awake since they were 7 weeks.

Times2 · August 2010

Thats why we decided to do it...my DH works at night so it was almost impossible for me to get them both down by myself..it got to the point where i needed him to come home to help me put them to bed ...which is ridiculous..im hoping the ferber method works..otherwise i dont know what im going to do

Times2 · August 2010

P.S....kudos to you for starting it at 7 weeks...wish I had done that! Wink

macchiatto · August 2010

I was really shocked at how well it worked, honestly! I just read HSHHC and followed their drowsy cues and put them down when they were drowsy for a nap (they'd been up about an hour and a half). Swaddled them, laid them down, left the room ... not a peep out of them! They fell asleep and from that point on they started taking relatively consistent naps. They do have their off days and weeks but overall they're pretty good sleepers. We still had lots of problems with nighttime wakings but once we got their reflux straightened out they started STTN at 4m. We have let them CIO occasionally since then but never had to do full-on Ferber/CIO. We do rock and sing to them as part of their nighttime routine and now we do that for naps, too, but it's only for a minute or two to help them wind down.

Good luck; I hope Ferber works for you! If not I really do recommend reading HSHHC/HSHHT.

kes3237 · August 2010

macchiatto:
We did HSHHC with both boys at the same time. I think in general, it's probably easier to do sleep training with both at once (barring special circumstances). If necessary, you can separate your twins until you get sleep issues sorted out. Are they in the same room now? Also, the HSHHC author wrote a book called "Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Twins." It's a quick read but might be very helpful.
Good luck!

I don't have twins but definitely recommend the book PP suggested. HSHHC saved my life, so I can only imagine the one specifically written for twins would be very helpful for you. GL!

Times2 · August 2010

I will definitely be picking up a copy of that book.....anything that can help I will try...I know that naps play a huge part in helping them sleep at night but I noticed I have to cut their afternoon nap short b/c the pedi said they only need 14 hrs of sleep a day and they nap about 1 1/2 hours in the am and were napping 1 hr plus in the afternoon..I usually put them down at 8pm so i only want them to nap a total of 3 hrs during the day...how long do your LO's nap?

macchiatto · August 2010

14 hrs is average from 6m to 2 years but some LOs need more and some need less. My boys' naptimes have been varying just recently because they are on the verge of dropping to one nap. But from 12m-18m they were taking two naps a day and each nap was 1-2 hrs long. Most days they got 3-3.5 hrs total of naps, and were sleeping 11.5-12 hrs at night.

macchiatto · August 2010

I should add, you might want to consider getting a copy of both HSHHC and HSHHT. (Maybe get one or both from the library if you don't want to buy both yet?) Read the twins version first to help you with your immediate issues, but HSHHC is also great to have on hand as a resource and reference. It covers sleep issues all the way through adolescence, is based on tons of research, and has great information about sleep in general and trouble-shooting sections for all the different ages.

Times2 · August 2010

It sounds like i might need both books....and your LO's sleep is very similar to mine..they nap twice a day with an average of 3 hr nap total...but if I let them they would take that afternoon nap into bad territory! so sometimes im forced to wake them so they dont nap for too long....thank you for the book suggestions I am defintiely going to invest in them!! Im wondering when they will finally transition to 1 nap....I like the morning nap it lets me catch up on things around the house

macchiatto · August 2010

Yeah, I am definitely going to miss the morning nap when they give it up! It will make scheduling certain things easier (plus a lot of local toddler activities are around 10 a.m. so we can finally go to those

) but I will really miss that chance to recoup in the morning, since I am NOT a morning person!

BitterOldHag · August 2010

gumiberg:

we didnt ferber per say, but when we had sleep issues we separated our twins to work on them. Are your twins ID or frat? I have heard ID twins do a better job at sleeping through each other cries...mine are frat (obviously) and do not sleep well through each other's crying.

We left ours separated since they do sleep better that way.

They share a room & woke each other 40% of the time. We did both at the same time at 13 months to eliminate 4am wakes. Now they get up at 5:45 and it's much better for everyone.

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