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2nd Trimester
Heading to the single parents board...
I was TEXTED this today..."email me when the kid is born and I'll have a lawyer come up with an agreement. I'll sign this mistake over to you 100%"...nice huh?
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Re: Heading to the single parents board...
Holy cr@pballs!
ETA: I should have said that I'm so sorry this is happening to you but I was too busy being floored at what a jackwad he is!
What Are Your Thoughts on Tap Dancing Penguins?
Sounds like a great guy!
I'm sorry he's the father of your child and that you're going through this. =/
WHOA!!! I'm so sorry. I'll think of something more meaningful to say after I pick my jaw up off the floor.
ETA: Do you think this related to any of the mother in law drama from yesterday?? Not that statments like that are forgivable but just a thought?
Sorry to hear that, but it seems you'll be better off without that dickwad in your life. I'll be hoping he gets punched in the gonads soon....and several times....by a little girl.
Oh my gosh!! How can people be so stupid and mean???
Sorry you have to deal with this.
After reading the advice from yesterday I never said anything to him (or his mom) and wanted to wait until it came up like some girls mentioned. I think he's bipolar but he blames his "craziness" on PTSD from being overseas in the war...Either way, I know I'm better off but it still hurts. I dont think I want to give the child his last name or put him on the birth certificate...Is that mean or going too far if he's signing the baby over anyways?
No I don't think it's going to far, but it might come back to bite you if you decide to go for child support later. (I'm not totally sure about that I heard it from a friend) I am soooooo sorry that this is happening to you! Has this been coming for a while or do you think it is the symptom of the bipolar (as in sudden irrational behavior)
NO that is 100% not mean or going too far. If you think there is even a chance that this completely unacceptable behavior is going to continue, that baby should get your name.
Bipolar or PTSD is not an excuse. There are resources, meds, HELP available if he chose to utilize them.
Ugh I can't believe someone would say that. I'm so sorry you're going through this.
Another thing- if you think he or his family will try to fight you for custody or cause drama, start documenting now. The med stealing, that text, any contact you have or communication regarding your baby. Of course both parents have rights, but IF it's in the best interest of the child.
Honestly, I don't need the child support. Sounds crazy but if he wants nothing to do with my child, I want nothing to do with him or his money. He's broke anyways paying child support for another child and I definitely have the means to support myself. I definitely didnt see this coming. Although we're not married or living together, we were still being civil and friends for the child's sake. He wanted to be involved and today he must have snapped. I dont want to sit and analyze what happened bc he is not worth the time. I dont want to feel sorry for myself either sooo its time to get planning on what to do now!
Well you are a stronger woman than I am!!! If there is anything an internet stranger can do for you please feel free to let me know. and again I am sooooooo sorry your going through this.
Gavin - 8/27/10
*TW*
Gabriel - 2nd tri loss 5/17/16 Trisomy 18 & 21
Hope - 2nd tri loss 12/7/16 complications from pneumonia
im just floored.. over a text message?? all i can say is.. SAVE IT..you may need that in the future.
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A baby getting his/her fathers last name is a privilege to the father, not a right.
However unless he is signing over all parental rights before the baby is born he should probably be on the birth certificate.
It isn't mean to give the baby your last name, but I'd list his name as the father on the birth certificate. My friend had a problem when her DD was born. The father's name was listed and he signed it, but the nurse dated it wrong or something so it wasn't valid. By the time they tried to re-do it her baby dad decided to deny paternity. It was just a power trip on his part because my friend wouldn't get back together with him, but it was a total PITA for her to get it resolved legally so she could get child support from him.
Also I don't know what he means by 100% yours, but I would not let him get out of providing child support. If he doesn't want partial custody in return for the monetary support, fine. But boyfriend gotta pay his due.
I agree with PP, although you have a while to think about this and other things, collect the child support and put it in a college fund for LO. We all think we're gonna be fine, with having a shower, all there is is diapers and food, right? but LO will eventually wanna play sports (which cost a ton in my area!!), have a first car, go to college or start their life, and you may as well collect the money and start a fund.
Now if that means that he'll have to get custody rights (every state is different), I would request supervised only without grandparents present, because of the painmeds issue grandma has. Definitely save those texts! In case him OR his parents want visitation rights. Maybe even email them to yourself, in case something happens to your phone?
Screw that douche and his wanting to walk away from his child. You don't have to sign the papers! Take him for child support and make him pay. I am so sorry you are going through this. I too am in the same boat and it isn't fun.
Wow.
I am so, so sorry that you're going through this... neither you or your LO deserve to deal with someone like that.
Wow!
It shows what kind of person he really is. I agree with the rest it really sux for you right now but I think, if this was going to happen, its best that it happened now instead of after the baby was born. He doesn't deserve to be a father. You will find a real man who is worthy of calling himself your child's father. Until then focus on you and your LO and getting ready. I have no doubt you will do just fine without him in your life, probably better because if he stuck around it would probably bring on more stress. Be strong for yourself and your child and best of luck!!!
Connor - 12/15/10 Abby - EDD 11/29/13
THIS is a wonderful idea, for just in case purposes!