"they'll have to be on formula anyway" (hormonal rant)

Mrs.Brink · July 2010

Never did I think I'd be hearing this from my own mom and that it would light a fire under myass like it did.

We were out at dinner last night and were talking about registery stuff and DH asked if I'd called our insurance yet to see if/what breast pump is covered. Well my mom (also an RN/shrink) said "well they'll be on formula anyway so save your money"....um...if I can do anything about it, No the hell they won't. Of course though if they need to be on formula then we'll put them on it (much like a c/sec, if I need it I'll do it...but until then, no). Their needs/safety comes first so whatever is best I'll do. But I'm going to try to breast feed as long as I can. I understand about supplementing and all that, but damnit woman...

But this really pissed me off that people assume I just can't handle it. I'm not the clients I work with at the rehab. I'm not going to give up just because it's hard or mentally exhausting...if that was the case I would've given up after our 1st m/c over 2yrs ago and we'd never have a chance at these boys.

Omg I wish people would have more faith in me! I haven't given up on anything yet...why would I start now...

I haven't even given up on the retardedass dog with the tiny bladder that even trainers have given up on!

Rant over Embarrassed

JenPVH · July 2010

Don't you hate it when other's thoughts and comments are negative and they somehow subconsciously sabotage possibilities from the get go! This really irks me that people speak for letting others try it out. They might be in for a surprise.

pepomntpat · July 2010

{hugs} Unfortunately this seems to be the view of the general population. I am sure you can do it!!

Are you going to try a La Leche League meeting? My Bradley teacher suggested it, but I'm a little afraid of the extremist view.

jmmiller28 · July 2010

RIGHT ON, sister! I am so sick of people having that same general attitude towards me as well. For example, I have heard this numerous times: I share with someone that I plan to breastfeed exclusively and my goal is to make it a year. And I share this not with trepidation or "gee, hope I make it" but instead with resolution and "can-do" attitude. I am usually met with a snort on the other end, a "good LUCK with that. You'll make it 2 months before you smarten up and just give that kid a bottle," and then they launch into a 15 minute diatribe about how they were once a starry-eyed and naive new mom like me and thought they'd BF too. It's frustrating because the only thing I have running through my head during their diarrhea of the mouth is: "Welp, I'm not you and you do not know the extent to which I will go for my goals and my child and please just shut yer trap now." I totally agree that I am fed up with people assuming that I will just give up. If they only knew how psycho I am about anything I put my mind to.

I say to heck with all of them. You know what you're capable of and willing to do, so just put them on your mental list of those you need to go "nah nah nah nah nah you thought I couldn't do it HA!" to in a year.

Mrs.Brink · July 2010

pepomntpat:

{hugs} Unfortunately this seems to be the view of the general population. I am sure you can do it!!

Are you going to try a La Leche League meeting? My Bradley teacher suggested it, but I'm a little afraid of the extremist view.

I haven't looked into classes yet but I'll definitely check them out. I've heard about them and am definitley intimidated but any help/info I can get I'll gladly take right now.

jmmiller28 · July 2010

Yeah, I thought about contacting LLL as well but do feel like they have a little bit more extreme of a view of breastfeeding than I'm personally comfortable with (not entirely ok with feeding my child from my breast when she no longer lies in my arms but instead can freely walk up to me and stand at my teet!). I think they could be a really good resource though and a good place to start. My hospital has a deal through a local parenting education company too and they offer discounts on classes. My husband and I signed up for the breastfeeding class.

TravelinMama · July 2010

Lots of moms to twins BF, if it's something you really want to do, you CAN do it!!!!

Your mom is irritating to say the least.

uklawgirl · July 2010

((HUGS))

It might just be your mom's generation too- my mom (also an RN) is pretty convinced that we'll be supplementing with a bottle (so that SHE can feed it when she visits). I can already tell we're going to have a round or two of it when I tell her that I'm going to EBF for at least the first three months until I have to go back to work.

Stay strong! YOU know what's best for your baby and screw what anyone else says.

erpetdoc · July 2010

I'm only carrying 1, so I don't know the extra needs of 2, but I don't see why you couldn't/wouldn't breastfeed or at least feed breastmilk with a bottle to twins the same as 1. You're going to pump just as much as they would feed (if they don't feed directly), and your body will increase the supply as it needs to (supply and demand theory).

Good for you for standing up to her....and good for you for wanting to give your babies at shot at breastmilk. I think that's awesome!

P.S. -- usually, insurance companies will cover the cost of a rental Symphony (or other hospital grade pump). When I called (Blue Cross/Blue Shield) they told me that they do not cover the cost of personal use pumps (I bought a Medela Freestyle for when I go back to work). The Symphony is not portable, so it wasn't a good option for me, but if you're staying home or staying in one place, the Symphony is a fabulous option. Most hospital LCs will have them available and some have rental programs. (I think our rental program is $60 or $80/month.)

grr_aargh · July 2010

I'm sorry that people are ALREADY trying to undermine your nursing relationship. That's got to be very hard.

Might I offer a piece of (totally unsolicited) advice? Is there any way you can connect with a La Leche League leader or Lactation Consultant before the twins are born? Even over the phone. Nursing twins is tough but you can do it! I want you to have some REAL cheerleaders, kwim?

(FYI: I sincerely doubt it's tougher than you. And you deserve to have some folks around who are willing to say "You CAN do this - you WILL do this - you ARE doing this" you know?)

amjra · July 2010

Yes, it stinks when ppl make assumptions. You do what is best for you and your babies. Just don't kill yourself if you need to supplement - or you need some sleep etc. Don't let them get to you, or think that they have won if you have any issues. You have nothing to prove Momma. I find smiling and saying non-committal things like, "We'll see how it goes, or Oh that's nice.." go a long way towards shrugging off other ppl's comments.

KelleyBean · July 2010

Ugh...I completely understand. The comments are really getting under my skin these days. My favorite is the snarky smile with the "you just wait" comment right behind it. I'm totally over it.