I went for another app. with my Dr. and after a very long talk with her, she said to me, "Stop trying to fight it. Why don't you just accept help and enjoy your beautiful son and motherhood"
This was it for me. It all made since. I was fighting the diagnosis and thinking that I could beat it. I could make myself, happy, ignore the feelings (I never had the urge to harm myself or Anderson). But I was trying so hard to just "fix" it on my own and I can't.
I wanted so badly not to be on meds. I thought that made me weak and I didn't want the "crazy" label attached to me. My marriage was being affected with my fight to "win" and I was not able to be the best mom I could be.
So it was time to just accept the fact that I need the meds. I need the help, and I need to stop trying to "win" because it isn't something that I can help.
So I have started taking medication and my journey to try to beat PPD. I have asked my hubby to not say anything to my family b/c I feel like in some ways I am weak and couldn't handle whatever it is I was supposed to. I just want to keep it to myself but wanted to let you ladies know b/c I have brought it up before. A few have asked how things were going and I appologize for ignoring you, but I was just not ready to talk about it.
I hope that now I am, and maybe can help to answer questions to other mommies that might be going through something similar.
I know there is a PPD board that I think I will visit. I never wanted to go over there b/c I was in my "fight", but now that I am beginning to accept this, I feel I'm starting to be able to talk about it.
Re: My battle with PPD
Talking about it is the first step hon! I am so proud of you for discussing it with us!! Taking meds does not make you weak!!! It takes a strong person to admit that they need help! And that is okay!!!! Anderson needs the very best Mommy you can be, and if you need a little help to get over this PPD than so be it....You will not be on meds forever, this will pass!!
You can talk about this anytime to us..That is why we are here....for better or for worse!!!
((Huge Hugs))
K+S 9.18.9 | DD #1 age 2 | PG # 5 EDD 9.17.12
Planning Bio Married Bio *Work In Progress*
Formerly Knottie Soon2beMrs.G_09
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As someone who's struggled with depression and fears PPD, I know just where you're coming from.
It's a HUGE step to finally "give in" and realize you need to do what's best for YOU. Judy, you're definitely not weak and in fact are a stronger woman for accepting help.
Drugs are merely a way to help you cope. Depression is a very real disease that takes a lot out of you. We're all here to listen whenever you need it.
Katy and Brett ~ Runaway Bay, Jamaica ~ October 4, 2008
Girl you a so strong for being able to acknowledge to do the right thing for you, your DH and A-man! You are truly inspiring!
Hugz, Hanneke
Oh sweetie I am so proud of you. You are a strong and loving mother. Please remember that PPD is caused by a hormone imbalance that is NOT your fault and you had no way of knowing your body would react like this after delivery. It is actually quite common, more common than you think (becasue it goes unreported for so long). And the best part about it is, its treatable. I'm so happy that you have decided to ask for support.
We are here for you and you are not alone. Giant hugs!
-Jul
This makes me very happy! Please let me know how it goes.
Ladies I cannot even begin to tell you how much your words and support mean to me. I was and still am worried and devastated with the diagnosis. But as I sit here and read your wonderful posts I KNOW that I will be able to get through it. I feel so blessed to have each of you for support and to lean on when and or if I need you.
You have made me so thankful that I posted this and it great to know that you all care. Thank you so much! I wish I could hug each of you, but here is my cyber hug
What you are experiencing is a change in your brain chemistry. You are not cazy. If the drugs help you regulate you brain chemistry so you can enjoy motherhood, then by all means accept the help. I wish you well on your road to recovery. It will come in time. The drugs take awhile to take effect. Most antidepressants start working almost immediately on a chemical level, but on behavioral level it takes time, so if you don't feel better right away, please keep taking the meds for 6 months to see if they can help you. Best of luck and feel free to join us on here.
Very well put and exactly what I was going to say. The hardest part is asking for help. Once things start working for you all you'll feel is relief that you're not at that point anymore. Best of luck, lots of hugs and vibes, and definitely keep us in mind if you need to talk.