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Babies: 0 - 3 Months
TTC a specific gender?
Although I have heard many old wives tales and strange methods to go
about trying to conceive a specific gender, I am wondering if any of you
have tried to sway the gender of your baby, if you have had any
success, and how you did it?
I have read alot about the male
sperm being smaller and faster, but quicker to die off, while the female
sperm are bigger and slower and tend to live longer. According to this
theory, if you want a girl you should have sex in the 4 or so days
preceding ovulation to allow most the males to be eliminated, and if you
want a boy you should have sex on the day of and day after you ovulate
to allow the males to arrive at the egg first. Has anyone used this
method?
I posted this in TTC and lots of the ladies thought I might get more help in here 
This discussion has been closed.
Re: TTC a specific gender?
We didn't do the Shettles method (I think that's the method you're referring to) this time, but I'm very interested in seeing the responses to your post, as we may consider doing something similar next time around.
They are OWT for a reason... they are tales. If you want a baby don't concern yourself about the sex. Be happy and excited about who ever you conceive. You should love your child regardless of the sex.
To be honest with you, I sort of wanted a boy (first born) but really didn't care if we had a boy or girl. We have a beautiful baby girl and found out she was a girl in the delivery room. I can't imagine my life without her and I can't imagine her being a boy. I love my daughter to no end. She is my world and I wouldn't change a thing about her. She's perfect and I am so excited to watch her learn and grow into a beautiful young woman. I'm so proud of my daughter.
I think I wanted a boy first because thats how society portrays the "perfect family" - boy first, girl second. But really - who cares? I am so happy to have a healthy daughter.
As far as conceiving goes... relax and enjoy the process of making a beautiful child.
This... enjoy the process of making a baby with your hubby! Babies are a blessing... I am INLOVE with my baby girl and I know I would have been just as in love with a baby boy! As long as your baby is healthy, your good!
We tried a few things to try for a boy (I really didn't care, but DH wanted a boy and so I agreed to the experiment thinking it wouldn't really work) and we got a boy.
We found a couple things online that we tried - first was something about the pH of the sperm, so DH drank something acidic before each time we had sex - usually just a can of pop. Then it said that rear entry was the best method to get a boy (there was no real justification for this that I thought made any sense, but we tried it anyways).
Who knows if they actually made a difference or what, but it is weird because DH's entire family is girls (he's the only boy out of 7 cousins). So who knows.
GL
Having a gender preference does not means you will love the ensuing baby no matter the gender. I thought it'd be great to have a girl first since I'm a girl had had a sister 11 years younger than me. Therefore I thought I'd know more about girls and that would ease me into motherhood.
We did try the Shettles method you are referring to to try to get a girl. Our son was conceived 5 days before I ovulated. And he is absolutely perfect and I wouldn't trade him for anything. But I don't necessarily regret trying for a girl. Any method can only increase your chances and is no guarantee, so my one experience is not much evidence of it working or not. So, feel free to try but only if you will be happy with a little boy or a little girl.
Good luck!
We read something about that too. Apparently I'm chemically more hospitable to girls, and apparently you can temporarily alter this ph. Not sure if I will try or not, but its definitely interesting! DH is within the range for boys, but we did hear something about caffeine affecting the male sperm so apparently drinking some coffee before will help (except he wont be able to sleep after haha)
I had read this except it saying that you are supposed to have the man drink coffee or pop before hand to give the sperm a boost. We did this and had sex the day I ovulated, and I got pregnant with a boy.
How do you know this? I would be curious to find it out about myself and my husband.
I have been reading an amazing book and researching online. When I get home I can post the name of the book (although its a Canadian version so info on things like mat leave and laws etc will be for Canada) But the ph levels thing I found online. I dont have the site marked anymore (maybe a google search would bring something up for you?) but I did write down the ranges.
To conceive a boy ph ranges should be over 8.5 for the male and over 6 for the female. Apparently female ph can be altered by a douche of warm water and baking soda (although I am ALWAYS wary of douching)
You just have to get some body ph testing strips (not the kind to check the ph in your hottub :P) We got ours from the local natural health and bulk food store. All we did was get one strip wet in his semen and got another strip wet with my fluids (the strips arent for internal use, so we applied the fluid to it, rather than touch it to me) Then you just wait a minute or so for it to finish changing colour and then compare it to the chart that comes with the ph testing strips. We did a few to make sure of the results.
I have an amazing relationship with my mother and would love to have a daughter one day to hopefully have a wonderful relationship like that with my daughter as well. I am also interested in trying this method to see if it works. Of course, I would be happy to have a baby boy as well.
When my husband and I decide to start trying to get pregnant, we are going to try for a girl and see what happens. It can't hurt to try. Neither of us will be disappointed.
My mom said she tried "positions" with my brother and I and it turned out to be true for her.
Yes it sure is interesting. It was spot on for my mom and aunt, but totally wrong for my cousin. She was supposed to have 2 girls according to the Gender chart and she has 2 boys. It says this is supposed to be a boy month for me, hopefully we get KU and we'll see
I did too
we are doing the same.
Although its funny, DH put a timeline on it. He wants to try for a boy until October and then if we dont get KU we will try like mad just to get pregnant. He wants to make this happen as soon as possible haha.
People who say guys dont want kids, that its just the woman pressuring them into, should talk to my husband
You're referring to the Shettles Method (https://www.babyhopes.com/how-to-choose-the-sex-of-your-baby-book.html). When DH and I were thinking about baby number one, we thought it would be interesting to see if you could try for a boy. We bought the "How to Choose the Sex of your Baby" book, and lo and behold it worked. DS was born in August 2008. We would have loved to PIECES our baby had it been a girl, the gender truly didn't matter to us one way or another, we simply thought, "what the hell, let's try" simply because I'm one of four girls and I have three nieces. I didn't really expect it to work, but it did.
I'm pregnant with DS number two right now, and we simply tried to conceive, but after the fact, it was all conditions that were prime for "boy making". I believe the science behind it.
I didn't do this on purpose, but the first month we TTC we decided to track my ovulation. Because it was the first month and my cycle went longer than average, we really weren't timing our intercourse to conceive a girl or a boy. BUT we didn't have sex for the three days prior to ovulation. Because we hadn't had sex those three days (and I didn't know about the lifetime of sperm), I thought we missed our chance that month. When I found out I was pregnant, I was literally shocked. Then I read about the lifetime of sperm and KNEW it was a girl. And sure enough, she's here now!
But honestly, I don't know how a person can know the day they're going to ovulate. I think that's very difficult; every month can vary. So I agree that the best thing to do is not to worry about the gender too much.
You both might want to reword that :-)
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We weren't trying to conceive a certain gender although my DH wanted a boy and I wanted a girl. I had heard of the method you originally mentioned about having sex earlier for a girl and right around ovulation time for a boy.
When we were TTC on the month that we conceived we last had sex on day 11 of my cycle and we conceived a girl, so I think there is some merit to this theory. I was told about this method by a girl at work who used it to conceive a girl as well. I think it?s worth a try when you TTC a boy try between day 12-14 of your cycle. Good luck!
We conceived on the only try during our window. It was less than 24 hours before conceiving which would make it a boy... chinese chart says it would be boy... so did my chinese fortune cookie at dinner LOL (although that hasn't been proven to mean anything ;o)) We are having a girl!
)
GOOD LUCK!
I wish people wouldn't get so touchy when you mention TTC a certain gender. As someone who is pregnant with her 3rd son, I can certainly understand wanting some say in the matter. Even my husband wanted a girl the first time around, as did I. Of course you love your child no matter what! And I'm sure I speak for all of us when I say we're just thankful to have conceived and that the baby is healthy. I love all 3 of my boys, but still fantasize about dresses and ponytails, and girly stuff I'll probably never have a chance to enjoy. All the barbies I'd saved from my childhood for my own little girl? I feel like chucking them now.
The chinese conception chart was wrong on 2 of my 3. We tried different positions too, nothing seems to work. I'm interested in the ph thing, and dh wants to try again (God help us!). I think we'd be better off adopting, He really wants it to be HIS genes.
Maybe we'll try sperm sorting, but even that isn't 100%!
Of course you will love whatever child you have, but certainly there's no harm in "trying" for a certain gender. We have two beautiful boys and are expecting a girl in about 1.5 weeks! I knew because of how much I love my boys that another boy would be fine...and it would be a boy if it were God's plan. However, I did a few things to "try for a girl," but honestly, I wasn't able to follow most of the stuff I read b/c my husband was newly home from Afghanistan and we weren't going to abstain. And I hadn't been able to figure out my ovulation day while he was away. For example, as a single mom, I had to get up and get my kids in the morning as opposed to taking my temperature for 3 minutes before getting out of bed to chart my basel temp.
At any rate, I don't know that any of it works, but I did take calcium and magnesium supplements and somewhat stayed away from salty foods (for boy, you are supposed to have lower calcium intake, higher potassium and salt). I would read up about ph levels, which I noticed some other women mentioned.
Since my husband was newly home from deployment, we were also BDing a lot, and I think that slows down the sperm in general and gives the girls a better chance. We did not quit the days before probably ovulation, though, as you'd do in the Shettles method.
We did try not to penetrate too deep when BDing (when trying for a girl; if you were trying for a boy, you'd "go deep").
My little angel RIP August 12, 2010 - September 5, 2010
It works, not the old wives tales but the scientific methods plus the chinese birth chart.
I was desperate to make baby # 3 a girl
*I went to about 20 diff websites and picked the months that had the highest number of all that continuously say girl. (not all chinese birth charts are the same).
*I did the whole acidic/ non acidic thing which had me eating junk to produce a girl (its no wonder i got boy on the first two...I dont like soda and white bread). I mainley tried to do the constant Almonds white rice soy milk and lamb.
* Lots of shallow penetration, missionary style.
**** Before I even started trying...vinegar douche.
I have my little girl inside due 10/10/10
GOOD LUCK
Wow, its so great to see all the different situations and opinions here. Its encouraging and also very sobering to read what everyones hopes were and what you ultimately got. Since we are just starting our family its easy to say we would be happy with whatever we get, but I totally can see how disheartening it would be for those who have multiples of one gender when they were hoping for a mix. I feel for you guys
Thanks so much for all the input! I'm finding it very helpful, not just for the information, but also for the support and mental preparation you have provided
Haha, Ya those people are definitely wrong, if anything my DH convinced me it was time to have a kid, I think when men are ready they want it NOW. haha woman have learned to be a little more patient, so they just want it for longer
I don't believe in the trying to concieve a certain gender methods, really they can't hurt so if you really want a certain gender, I'd say go for it, but they all have all are right about 50% of the time.
Haha definitely. My FIL told us it took him 6 years to convince my MIL they should have kids and then it took a couple more to achieve. He said he was sad they stopped at 2 because "they had just gotten good at it" haha I love that MH comes from a long line of men wanting and loving children