Am i the only mom that has had a c-section and considered it a "real birth". Since to some bumpies a C/S isnt a real birth does that make me not a real mom?
We are real moms. The holyier-than-thow vag deliveries need to let up. Not everyone gets to pick how their babies come out. As long as our LOs are out safe and healthy is what matters. Well in my opinion anyways. Your a real mommy )
well. . . since i was in 18+ hrs of REAL labor before i had the "fake" birth. . HELLS YEA its a real birth. . and anyone who says its fake can come kiss my long-a$$ scar on my stomach and feel the part where it got infected. . and they had to reopen it. . . . *sigh* some people
!!Not a real birth?!?! I thought my birth was pretty damn real and mine was a csection too.
Yea, I thought I missed the memo telling me I had a fake birth...I thought what I did was pretty self sacrificing if were going to go the holier-than-thou route...
I basically consider everything but my particular circumstances "giving birth". I was asleep for the whole thing, never went through labor, etc. But for those of you who went through labor and/or were awake when your babies were born, I am going to say you gave birth.
We are real moms. The holyier-than-thow vag deliveries need to let up. Not everyone gets to pick how their babies come out. As long as our LOs are out safe and healthy is what matters. Well in my opinion anyways. Your a real mommy )
Woah. The post she is talking about the C/S mommas are the ones saying their births didn't feel real, not the Vag mommas.
We are real moms. The holyier-than-thow vag deliveries need to let up. Not everyone gets to pick how their babies come out. As long as our LOs are out safe and healthy is what matters. Well in my opinion anyways. Your a real mommy )
This
My c/s was an emergency, but I believe a healthy momma and baby are whats important.
We are real moms. The holyier-than-thow vag deliveries need to let up. Not everyone gets to pick how their babies come out. As long as our LOs are out safe and healthy is what matters. Well in my opinion anyways. Your a real mommy )
Woah. The post she is talking about the C/S mommas are the ones saying their births didn't feel real, not the Vag mommas.
Yes....she is very much correct! Im talking about the mommas that had to have c-sections whining about having them and claiming they wanted a "real birth"...thats EXTREMELY annoying to me.
I have never heard a c-section birth be referred to as a fake birth...
Scroll down to the Are you jealous post and towards the bottom the OP mentions her c-section not feeling like a real birth because she wanted one vaginally...
I'm sorry to have upset some of you. I was just expressing how I felt regarding MY birthing experience. I didn't mean to say that a c-section wasn't a "real birth." I thought I was going to have a vaginal birth. I prayed for a vaginal birth because the thought of a c-section really scared me. My expectations of birth weren't what really happened and it's hard coming to terms with that. We are all told that vaginal births are what are bodies are capable of doing, so it's hard not to expect that. Again, I was just expressing how I felt about what happened to me, not making any generalizations. Everyone will interpret their birthing experiences differently.
My child's birth was very real....24 hours of real birthing with 3 hours of pushing. To push for 3 hours hoping that this push will be it...and to end up laid out on the operating table, completely paralyzed from the neck down due to the emergency of the situation, I think you may get a little sad here and there that it didn't end with the baby flying out the vag, after all that work. I think you need to take a step back and not take things so literally. To many of us, who are "whining", we mean that we didn't get to experience all the pushing with the end result of baby coming out the vag or in the way that the delivery started. It was alot of hard work as all of you know and for it to end up with emergency c-sections is not only scary at the moment, but does make one feel a little sad that it didn't end the natural way. So because I said I didn't get to experience the "real thing" you are assuming that I don't think I'm a real mom?!? Way to be ignorant.
I have never heard a c-section birth be referred to as a fake birth...
Scroll down to the Are you jealous post and towards the bottom the OP mentions her c-section not feeling like a real birth because she wanted one vaginally...
"It doesn't feel "real" to me because I expected to push my baby out and not have her cut out of me."
The way you wrote your post I thought maybe someone was saying that YOU shouldn't feel that way about your birth. She is expressing the way she feels about HER birth. Instead of writing a post bahsing what she said where her feelings how about helping her to feel better about her experience?
"It doesn't feel "real" to me because I expected to push my baby out and not have her cut out of me."
The way you wrote your post I thought maybe someone was saying that YOU shouldn't feel that way about your birth. She is expressing the way she feels about HER birth. Instead of writing a post bahsing what she said where her feelings how about helping her to feel better about her experience?
Amen. Why are you so bothered by HER feelings about HER birth? Overly sensitive, much?
the bug & bee blog
(read it. you know you want to.)
anderson . september 2008
vivian . february 2010
mabel . august 2012
I'm sorry to have upset some of you. I was just expressing how I felt regarding MY birthing experience. I didn't mean to say that a c-section wasn't a "real birth." I thought I was going to have a vaginal birth. I prayed for a vaginal birth because the thought of a c-section really scared me. My expectations of birth weren't what really happened and it's hard coming to terms with that. We are all told that vaginal births are what are bodies are capable of doing, so it's hard not to expect that. Again, I was just expressing how I felt about what happened to me, not making any generalizations. Everyone will interpret their birthing experiences differently.
Seriously - do NOT apologize for how you feel. You're entitled to your feelings about your birth experience. ((hugs))
the bug & bee blog
(read it. you know you want to.)
anderson . september 2008
vivian . february 2010
mabel . august 2012
I'm sorry to have upset some of you. I was just expressing how I felt regarding MY birthing experience. I didn't mean to say that a c-section wasn't a "real birth." I thought I was going to have a vaginal birth. I prayed for a vaginal birth because the thought of a c-section really scared me. My expectations of birth weren't what really happened and it's hard coming to terms with that. We are all told that vaginal births are what are bodies are capable of doing, so it's hard not to expect that. Again, I was just expressing how I felt about what happened to me, not making any generalizations. Everyone will interpret their birthing experiences differently.
Seriously - do NOT apologize for how you feel. You're entitled to your feelings about your birth experience. ((hugs))
Thanks. I didn't mean to upset anyone. I just wanted to know if anyone else felt like I did.
I'm sorry to have upset some of you. I was just expressing how I felt regarding MY birthing experience. I didn't mean to say that a c-section wasn't a "real birth." I thought I was going to have a vaginal birth. I prayed for a vaginal birth because the thought of a c-section really scared me. My expectations of birth weren't what really happened and it's hard coming to terms with that. We are all told that vaginal births are what are bodies are capable of doing, so it's hard not to expect that. Again, I was just expressing how I felt about what happened to me, not making any generalizations. Everyone will interpret their birthing experiences differently.
Seriously - do NOT apologize for how you feel. You're entitled to your feelings about your birth experience. ((hugs))
THIS
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I'm sorry to have upset some of you. I was just expressing how I felt regarding MY birthing experience. I didn't mean to say that a c-section wasn't a "real birth." I thought I was going to have a vaginal birth. I prayed for a vaginal birth because the thought of a c-section really scared me. My expectations of birth weren't what really happened and it's hard coming to terms with that. We are all told that vaginal births are what are bodies are capable of doing, so it's hard not to expect that. Again, I was just expressing how I felt about what happened to me, not making any generalizations. Everyone will interpret their birthing experiences differently.
Seriously - do NOT apologize for how you feel. You're entitled to your feelings about your birth experience. ((hugs))
Thanks. I didn't mean to upset anyone. I just wanted to know if anyone else felt like I did.
I agree do not apologize OP just wanted to get her panties in a twist!!
Oh FFS. She was expressing disappointment with her OWN birth experience. Just because YOU didn't feel the same way, doesn't mean the whole freakin world needs to feel the same as you. She is entitled to HER OWN feelings. Instead of trying to make her feel worse, maybe you could offer a little support instead. Christ.
I usually feel fine about my c/s but yeah sometimes I am also disappointed that after a long labor and pushing I ended up with a c/s. But DS also got whisked to the nicu before I could see him and that part still makes me upset.
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I've had one of each, and I truly don't feel like one was "more" or "less" of a birth than the other. The c/s birth was less intense because I wasn't concentrating on pushing, but the recovery was so much harder. But my vaginal birth recovery was no piece of cake either.
I am glad that my first was a vaginal birth because I was so freaked out about c-sections. The second time around, I was able to be much more relaxed about things, even though I was still nervous about it and would've preferred to avoid a c/s. But my baby was breech and that was that. It ended up not being anything to be afraid of, after all.
My first was induced due to pre-e at full-term and a vaginal birth; the second time, my water broke and I went into labor on my own, but had to go right for a c/s because DD2 was breech. So each time I got a little something that I wanted, but not everything.
There were positive and negatives about each of my births, but overall I am satisfied with the experience and outcome of them both. I think it's interesting to have had both a vaginal and a c/s, and it definitely gives me a unique perspective, I think. While neither of them was exactly the birth I would've chosen if I had a choice, I want to value those experiences for what they were, and I don't feel like my body failed me either time.
Am i the only mom that has had a c-section and considered it a "real birth". Since to some bumpies a C/S isnt a real birth does that make me not a real mom?
Alright who said c-sections aren't "real births"? Cause that makes no sense what-so-ever. I need to read that thread to believe someone would actually say or imply that.
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I'm sorry to have upset some of you. I was just expressing how I felt regarding MY birthing experience. I didn't mean to say that a c-section wasn't a "real birth." I thought I was going to have a vaginal birth. I prayed for a vaginal birth because the thought of a c-section really scared me. My expectations of birth weren't what really happened and it's hard coming to terms with that. We are all told that vaginal births are what are bodies are capable of doing, so it's hard not to expect that. Again, I was just expressing how I felt about what happened to me, not making any generalizations. Everyone will interpret their birthing experiences differently.
Don't apologize I know exactly how you feel. OP You were mentally prepared for a c-section big difference.
I went through 18hrs of labor my epidural slipped so I had no pain relief at the end. I threw up 5x and pushed in 6 different positions for a total of 3hours and DS was very stuck I got wheeled into the OR but they kept having issues finding DS on the heart monitor so they were in too much of a hurry to redo my epi and I got put under. I came out half out of it feeling like what the hell just happened. I feel like I got robbed of my delivery! Not because it was a c-section but because it wasn't what I expected and to go through all the pain of labor to only end up being put under and not even seeing your son come into the world was very upsetting. I was very upset for a long time!
She is definitely entitled to feel the way she does and she's not the only one. I've read many of the same things on the message boards.
I can sympathize a little, though I was actually the opposite of most people--I was terrified of labor, not a C-section!
I can sympathize because both times it wasn't what I expected. I too was put under--but after my daughter came out--I got to see her but my epi wore off while they were getting me put back together and that put me in so much pain I couldn't even focus--my husband brought her over and I couldn't open my eyes to look. My anestesioligist (I can't spell tonight, sorry) kept telling me I needed to open my eyes. I was foggy for the first little bit and felt a tad cheated that I didn't get to hold her in recovery right away.
With my second it was a scheduled C and everything went off without a hitch--but the day after I came home with him I had to go the ER and ended up in the ICU for a week with 'post partum pre-eclempsia."
I almost died, and while I sat there hooked up to monitors, waiting for my heart's swelling to go down, my baby was at home with my parents. His first few nights at home were with my mom, not me.
So, while I never did push and scream I did get put through the ringer and felt both births were traumatic but the end result was two beautiful, healthy kids.
I know there's some disappoinment but just think--we are LUCKY that we have doctors qualified to perform C-sections and there to intervene.
100 years ago, many of us wouldn't have made it through, or our kids might not have.
It's morbid to think about a thing like that, I know, but if you focus on the end result, your happy, beautiful baby...the disappointment will go away eventually.
If you really want to experience a vaginal birth, talk to your doctor about a VBAC if you decide to have more children.
I'm sorry to have upset some of you. I was just expressing how I felt regarding MY birthing experience. I didn't mean to say that a c-section wasn't a "real birth." I thought I was going to have a vaginal birth. I prayed for a vaginal birth because the thought of a c-section really scared me. My expectations of birth weren't what really happened and it's hard coming to terms with that. We are all told that vaginal births are what are bodies are capable of doing, so it's hard not to expect that. Again, I was just expressing how I felt about what happened to me, not making any generalizations. Everyone will interpret their birthing experiences differently.
Seriously - do NOT apologize for how you feel. You're entitled to your feelings about your birth experience. ((hugs))
Re: Fake C/S moms...
If a baby came out of your body you gave birth regardless of what "hole" it came out of.
[color=#FF0000]Mom to 5 girls 23,22,18,9,7 and one sweet Wonderboy almost 4[/color]
The Chaos of Six!
I haven't heard/felt anything like this on the bump.
Given that I'm up almost every night at 2am, I certainly feel like a real mom, no different than any other mom.
Oh for the love of...
childbirth is childbirth.
Did they pull your kid out through your nose? I'm Guessing no.
And does that mean all of the women who adopted or are step moms aren't real moms.
I don't think giving birth makes you a mom...being a mom makes you a mom
Yea, I thought I missed the memo telling me I had a fake birth...I thought what I did was pretty self sacrificing if were going to go the holier-than-thou route...
This
My c/s was an emergency, but I believe a healthy momma and baby are whats important.
Yes....she is very much correct! Im talking about the mommas that had to have c-sections whining about having them and claiming they wanted a "real birth"...thats EXTREMELY annoying to me.
I had no choice on a c-section. DD was not coming down into my pelvis and my blood pressure was dangerously high.
I'd like for someone to tell me that the 36 hour labor I had wasn't a real birth. They'll see my foot up their butt really quickly.
LOL. I think my c/s was more real than a vag birth. They're all pretty damn real but I have a scar to remind me of how real it was. Oh, and two kids.
Haha I'm so with you on that one.
Scroll down to the Are you jealous post and towards the bottom the OP mentions her c-section not feeling like a real birth because she wanted one vaginally...
I delivered vaginally. I was SCARED TO DEATH of a c-section. So I'm actually more impressed of it your way!
PS your baby is getting cuter by the day
I'm sorry to have upset some of you. I was just expressing how I felt regarding MY birthing experience. I didn't mean to say that a c-section wasn't a "real birth." I thought I was going to have a vaginal birth. I prayed for a vaginal birth because the thought of a c-section really scared me. My expectations of birth weren't what really happened and it's hard coming to terms with that. We are all told that vaginal births are what are bodies are capable of doing, so it's hard not to expect that. Again, I was just expressing how I felt about what happened to me, not making any generalizations. Everyone will interpret their birthing experiences differently.
My child's birth was very real....24 hours of real birthing with 3 hours of pushing. To push for 3 hours hoping that this push will be it...and to end up laid out on the operating table, completely paralyzed from the neck down due to the emergency of the situation, I think you may get a little sad here and there that it didn't end with the baby flying out the vag, after all that work. I think you need to take a step back and not take things so literally. To many of us, who are "whining", we mean that we didn't get to experience all the pushing with the end result of baby coming out the vag or in the way that the delivery started. It was alot of hard work as all of you know and for it to end up with emergency c-sections is not only scary at the moment, but does make one feel a little sad that it didn't end the natural way. So because I said I didn't get to experience the "real thing" you are assuming that I don't think I'm a real mom?!? Way to be ignorant.
"It doesn't feel "real" to me because I expected to push my baby out and not have her cut out of me."
The way you wrote your post I thought maybe someone was saying that YOU shouldn't feel that way about your birth. She is expressing the way she feels about HER birth. Instead of writing a post bahsing what she said where her feelings how about helping her to feel better about her experience?
Amen. Why are you so bothered by HER feelings about HER birth? Overly sensitive, much?
(read it. you know you want to.)
anderson . september 2008
vivian . february 2010
mabel . august 2012
Seriously - do NOT apologize for how you feel. You're entitled to your feelings about your birth experience. ((hugs))
(read it. you know you want to.)
anderson . september 2008
vivian . february 2010
mabel . august 2012
Thanks. I didn't mean to upset anyone. I just wanted to know if anyone else felt like I did.
THIS
I agree do not apologize OP just wanted to get her panties in a twist!!
Oh FFS. She was expressing disappointment with her OWN birth experience. Just because YOU didn't feel the same way, doesn't mean the whole freakin world needs to feel the same as you. She is entitled to HER OWN feelings. Instead of trying to make her feel worse, maybe you could offer a little support instead. Christ.
I've had one of each, and I truly don't feel like one was "more" or "less" of a birth than the other. The c/s birth was less intense because I wasn't concentrating on pushing, but the recovery was so much harder. But my vaginal birth recovery was no piece of cake either.
I am glad that my first was a vaginal birth because I was so freaked out about c-sections. The second time around, I was able to be much more relaxed about things, even though I was still nervous about it and would've preferred to avoid a c/s. But my baby was breech and that was that. It ended up not being anything to be afraid of, after all.
My first was induced due to pre-e at full-term and a vaginal birth; the second time, my water broke and I went into labor on my own, but had to go right for a c/s because DD2 was breech. So each time I got a little something that I wanted, but not everything.
There were positive and negatives about each of my births, but overall I am satisfied with the experience and outcome of them both. I think it's interesting to have had both a vaginal and a c/s, and it definitely gives me a unique perspective, I think. While neither of them was exactly the birth I would've chosen if I had a choice, I want to value those experiences for what they were, and I don't feel like my body failed me either time.
DD1, 1/5/2008 ~~~ DD2, 3/17/2010
Alright who said c-sections aren't "real births"? Cause that makes no sense what-so-ever. I need to read that thread to believe someone would actually say or imply that.
Don't apologize I know exactly how you feel. OP You were mentally prepared for a c-section big difference.
I went through 18hrs of labor my epidural slipped so I had no pain relief at the end. I threw up 5x and pushed in 6 different positions for a total of 3hours and DS was very stuck I got wheeled into the OR but they kept having issues finding DS on the heart monitor so they were in too much of a hurry to redo my epi and I got put under. I came out half out of it feeling like what the hell just happened. I feel like I got robbed of my delivery! Not because it was a c-section but because it wasn't what I expected and to go through all the pain of labor to only end up being put under and not even seeing your son come into the world was very upsetting. I was very upset for a long time!
She is definitely entitled to feel the way she does and she's not the only one. I've read many of the same things on the message boards.
I can sympathize a little, though I was actually the opposite of most people--I was terrified of labor, not a C-section!
I can sympathize because both times it wasn't what I expected. I too was put under--but after my daughter came out--I got to see her but my epi wore off while they were getting me put back together and that put me in so much pain I couldn't even focus--my husband brought her over and I couldn't open my eyes to look. My anestesioligist (I can't spell tonight, sorry) kept telling me I needed to open my eyes. I was foggy for the first little bit and felt a tad cheated that I didn't get to hold her in recovery right away.
With my second it was a scheduled C and everything went off without a hitch--but the day after I came home with him I had to go the ER and ended up in the ICU for a week with 'post partum pre-eclempsia."
I almost died, and while I sat there hooked up to monitors, waiting for my heart's swelling to go down, my baby was at home with my parents. His first few nights at home were with my mom, not me.
So, while I never did push and scream I did get put through the ringer and felt both births were traumatic but the end result was two beautiful, healthy kids.
I know there's some disappoinment but just think--we are LUCKY that we have doctors qualified to perform C-sections and there to intervene.
100 years ago, many of us wouldn't have made it through, or our kids might not have.
It's morbid to think about a thing like that, I know, but if you focus on the end result, your happy, beautiful baby...the disappointment will go away eventually.
If you really want to experience a vaginal birth, talk to your doctor about a VBAC if you decide to have more children.
Hang in there.
I soo agree with this too