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NBR - roommates (longish)
My little brother's girlfriend (GF) is moving in with us this week. She was living in an apartment with another girl, but now that girl is going to move in with someone else. GF has basically been cut-off by her parents, so she has no where to go. She has someone lined up to move in with in the fall, but that girl is still living at home with her parents until they are ready to move in together. GF got into a car accident a couple of months ago and has no car now. So she is moving in with us until September so she can save up some money (but we are still having her pay us a little bit) to buy another clunker car.
Has anyone ever had another person live with their family? Any advice for us? She is staying in our guest room, but we all have to share one bathroom. (We have 2 in our house, but one has been semi-under-construction for the past year. Ugh.) She is really very sweet and awesome with DD. She is very helpful with her and housework stuff, so I feel like this is going to be an ok deal. She has said that when she moves in, she would be happy to watch DD if I had to run errands and she wouldn't mind chilling here at night so DH and I could go out after DD is in bed. This all sounds semi-heavenly to me, since we haven't been on a date-night in a LONG time and DH works alot so it would be nice to run to the grocery store alone sometimes.
We just spent a week together at the beach with my family and it really wasn't bad at all. DH and I like our privacy, so I think at times it will be weird to have someone here. But then I think at other times it will just feel natural. I am just hoping that we can find a good balance between together time and alone time, KWIM? I'm pretty vocal with how I feel about stuff (in the nicest possible way, of course) so I just hope that she adjusts well to our family lifestyle and that we are able to adjust well to having someone else here too!
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Re: NBR - roommates (longish)
We did this a couple of years ago to help out a friend of ours. She was finishing her Masters degree and had to do an internship with a hospital withw as 20-30 minutes from our house and she lived in Cincinnati. So during the week she lived with us but went home on the weekends. It was great for me. I loved it. My DH works late so it was nice to have someone to help with dinner, take the girls on walks and etc. I don't have a negative thing to say about the entire experience. I will say that we had our own bathrooms though so I can't imagine that. I hope everything goes smoothly with your roomate. If you need a place to escape you can always come over to my house
I lived with my DH's brother for 3 years (yes you read that right, YEARS). It's a long story, but I can't say that every day was rainbows and sunshine. DH's brother and I fought constantly over really stupid stuff and I hated that he never left the house (sometimes you need some alone time, ya know?)
Then again, I think it was differnet b/c he was a guy and he definitely overstayed his welcome which wore on my nerves. Also, DH always felt like he was in the middle, so it's probably differnet when you're living with family.
On the other hand, It was nice to have some extra $ (he paid rent) and this was before we had DS, so I agree, it would have been nice to have someone there to babysit if I needed to run an errand.
So not to be a downer, but having someone else move in does change things. Just make sure you and DH are prepared for someone else being there all the time. It does get kind of weird. Good luck!!!
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daves gave great advice as to things to think through. Definitely set up some ground rules within a few days of her moving in unless you have a chance to do so ahead of time.
Think about your daily routines and how things will work out. Also, think about food- should she provide her own and make her own meals, or will you guys let her join you at dinner?
I boarded with 2 different families when I co-oped in college. One family was one where I had a room, access to a shared bathroom, and would join in on meals. She charged me a set amount for the week (I stayed Monday-Thursday and went home on the weekends) and tallied the number of dinners I ate. I remember each dinner costing $2.50.. not a bad deal!
The other place I boarded I was on my own. I had a plastic milk tray in the fridge for my food and a shelf in the pantry. I made my own meals and cleaned up after myself. I had to share a bathroom- and it was the only one in the house. That was the most complicated part. Too many people needing to use the bathroom at once... so you might want to think about this too.
Anyway, definitely think about what things she should be responsible for cleaning, when she can do laundry, and what the rent/food cost is going to be. If I think of anything else, I"ll let you know.