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December 2010 Moms
futuremrshackney
member
Who do you plan on being in the room?
futuremrshackney
member
Hopefully this question hasn't been asked recently and I missed it 
I'm in a bit of a situation but I will get through it. I want my MIL to be there because we are close and shes had four children, so lots of experience with child birth.
I have a very rocky relationship with my mother, she has an emotional/mental illness. I"m her only child and she had me via c section while under general. She asked to be there and of course I knew if I was inviting MIL I would have to say yes. Of course after I said that she remarked "ARE YOU SURE? because your cousin said I could be in the room too and then she changed her mind and asked her father to be there."
Rude.
So who do you plan on having there?
Me: DH, and both moms
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Re: Who do you plan on being in the room?
My mom and my husband. I would love for my sister to be in there since she's an LPN and loves watching that kind of stuff but she will have an 8 week old baby and I wouldn't expect her to have someone watch her LO while she was in the delivery room.
My MIL will not be anywhere near my room until AFTER the baby is born. She's a nut case and I can't take her drama even though she means well. And when I say nutcase I'm talking she's been committed twice. I don't need a paranoid schizophrenic, bi-polar manic depressive in my room before I deliver.
C-section, so just DH.
But if it were natural then I'd ask for DH and my mom.
Just my husband. My mom has a hard time with monopolizing situations and I did NOT want her to take over and make it all about how she was becoming a grandma.
I would have loved to have my MIL in the room though. She was a nurse and had a very calming presence about her, but she died a few years ago.
Just DH and myself, of course. We're kind of feeling that it's a very special and private moment to meet our baby. When we got married, we saw each other before the ceremony, just alone with a photographer to capture the moment. So it's definitely something we're sticking to right now.
PS. My mother is a nut case too. She drinks A LOT. Scares me to put her anywhere near the baby.
The first words out of my MIL's mouth when we told her that we were pregnant was, "I'm not going to be able to watch your kid for long periods of time." It took all my power to not tell her, "Even if you 'could' I wouldn't let you alone with it for more than 20 minutes."
This is my mom.
And I can already picture her trying to tell me how to have our baby when shes never even been in labor. I am hoping that my DH and MIL being there will help to keep her from acting out too much.
I'm sorry to hear about your MIL
Hopefully you will still be able to feel her presence with you when you deliever.
Me, DH, and paid medical professionals only.
I am a fairly private person and I do not think I will feel comfortable giving birth with my mom or sister in the room.
And...I can say I understand about the crazy moms / MIL....In my case it is MIL. She will definitely not be spending any alone time with LO. In fact, she doesn't even know we are expecting yet.... My poor FIL's head will probably roll when she finds out that he has known since I was 4 weeks and he didn't tell her (they are divorced but are in contact on a regular basis b/c of alimony payments!)
right now i can only think of my husband being in there , which will be hard for him because he cant take seeing me in pain he freaks out. My mom asked but sometimes she does things to freak me out or says things that are inappropriate, I.E. she kissed my neck when we were hugging goodbye one time, and i another time i was scared there was something wrong with the baby and she made a deformed joke. not ok.
i kinda talked around letting her in telling her i dont know what the hospital will allow. BUT im her only chance at grandkids and she has been buying stuff like crazy for the baby already. I may have to suck it up and just tell her "no jokes, no negative comments, just support me or see yourself out" and let here be there for it.
NO WAY do i want my MIL in there. i work with her thats close enough i dont need her seeing my Vajazz that day like the rest of the world.
It will just be me and my husband. Not even any students. I'm too much of a private person to have lots of people in the room, whether they've seen it before or not lol.
Definitely couldn't imagine having my MIL there, at all. I think it's nice if you have that kind of relationship with your MIL, though.
My mum gave birth to my sister & I on her own too (due to a couple of reasons) and she, luckily, feels the same way I do. So I won't have pressure from her.
She will be the ONLY person at the hospital though, in case my husband passes out lol.
BFP #2 4/13/10. Bridget born 12/28/10
BFP #3 Finn born 8/11/15
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This is my mother...ugh.
Anyway I am having a section and she thinks that the hospital will make an exception for her to be in the room with us...I will let her think that. She does not realize that J's family wants to be very involved, as this is his first child. He has divorced parents and the step's have been around for a better part of 12-15 years. I am just going to have J in there and when I am out of recovery (J and DS will be in recovery with me and baby), he will let everyone come in.
My mother also has this irrational fear that b/c J's mom works at the hospital in registration that she will see that baby before anyone. I'm just frustrated with my mother! UGH!
This. It's an experience that I want to share solely with my husband. I have a wonderful relationship with my mother but it never even entered my mind to ask her to be in the room with us.
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Just my husband. And the doctors/nurses, of course.
I love our families, but this is (IMO) a private, intimate moment that is the start of our family, and I want it to be just us two (eventually 3). The entire town can parade through afterward, I don't really care.
I could even take it further and would like to allow very few visitors on the first day. I just don't know if that would fly with my dh.