my BFing woes

Sofka · June 2010

as a F/U to my earlier post on my sore nipples,

I saw an LC at LOUDOUN INOVA on Tue. and she is pretty sure DS has a tight fendulum, basically his tongue cannot reach over the lower gums and that's why it hurts so much when he latches on. I've been pumping ever since. I'm using APNO - All Purpose Nipple Ointment for my cut up and sore nipples, it's like a miracle lotion for your nips! Only a few pharmacies in the area will make it but there is 1 near us. I never even knew there was something other than lanolin I could use!

I hate the idea of becoming an exclusive pumper, it's so hard to get up in the middle of the night and pump and I know my supply will go down once DH is back at work next week. I totally admire those who EP but I know it's not for me...I love the actual BFing experience and feel so sad and depressed that I may not have that w/ DS, esp. since I went 14mo w/ DD!

we see an ENT today for the fendulum issue but DH is being very stubborn and refuses to "snip his boy" (ummm he had no problem circumcizing him!!) so I don't know what we'll do. (By snipping the fendulum, the tissue that holds the tongue in place, it'll help extend the tongue). I'll try to update later, it's been hard to get the time to get online.

nolebride · June 2010

Ugh. I'm sorry you're having such a hard time. I hope your H will change his mind about the snip. As you well know, all you do is try your best to pump as long as you can tolerate it.

Re: the ointment. I totally agree. I got some from the Breast Feeding Center and it was AMAZING. Worked almost immediately. I didn't recommend it before b/c I figured you wouldn't be driving into DC for some cream. Glad you found a pharmacy to make it for you.

mlvmd · June 2010

DH had his tongue snipped as a baby and it's a good thing, even now he can barely stick out his tongue. DS and I like to stick ours out and make him jealous.(Okay, DS doesn't know this is why we are sticking out our tongues, but it is).

rnin02 · June 2010

Why is your DH against having DS's frenulum cut? But he was fine with a circumcision? Getting the frenulum cutting is only 100x easier and faster than a circ, and healing time is minimal...babies are breastfeeding almost immediately after. I hope you or the ENT can change his mind...or maybe he can try breastfeeding and see how it feels! I'm so annoyed on your behalf...hope you have a good outcome, good luck with the ENT!

tomandcourt · June 2010

Can you have your LC or pedi talk to your husband about the snip? It's obviously better for both of you if you can BF naturally. This would be the one scenario where I might actually think about doing it and not telling him . . .

Karenbird · June 2010

Just wanted to offer hugs from someone who has been there. I was happy to BF DD for 14 months, and it was a hard adjustment when BF with DS did not work out for us. It might be hard to believe, but it's true; once I realized (accepted? For me, it was hard to give up that feeling of empowerment that I felt by BF DD) that DS was thriving, the details didn't matter. I hope you can settle in to a feeding regimen that makes you both happy soon.

amh_navyblue · June 2010

Another vote for getting DH to change his mind. I don't have experience with this issue, but it sounds like once it's taken care of you'll be able BF like you want to. I would hope that DH could support you in that.

GL!

DCtoLowcountry · June 2010

In addition to having pedi/LC talk to your DH about the benefits of the surgery, estimate how much it would cost to FF. I BF'd and FF, and BFing is definitely cheaper!

HikerBride07 · June 2010

As I said in your other post, we had the same issue w/DD. The tissue they snip has no nerve in it. It is essentially like a woman's hymen. When DD had it snipped she cried because DH was holding her still for the doc. She had NO reaction to the actual snip, which takes a millisecond. I really, really hope your husband will reconsider or the ENT can convince him.

eeclem · June 2010

rnin02:
Why is your DH against having DS's frenulum cut? But he was fine with a circumcision? Getting the frenulum cutting is only 100x easier and faster than a circ, and healing time is minimal...babies are breastfeeding almost immediately after. I hope you or the ENT can change his mind...or maybe he can try breastfeeding and see how it feels! I'm so annoyed on your behalf...hope you have a good outcome, good luck with the ENT!

Yeah, I don't get the opposition? Weird. APNO is magic stuff. I had some seriously bad cracks and it was a blessing. Then when C was going through a face scratching phase (well, he's still going through it) I used it on those and it clears them right up. I figured if it's safe for him to eat, it's safe to put on his little cheeks.

mommmyz · June 2010

DCtoLowcountry:
In addition to having pedi/LC talk to your DH about the benefits of the surgery, estimate how much it would cost to FF. I BF'd and FF, and BFing is definitely cheaper!

This for sure! I bf'd for 5.5 months and had to stop due to low supply...I know you want to bf for other reasons too, and I did as well, but I think for DH's sometimes the money thing is very convincing! I am in awe of anyone who EP's. It wasn't possible with my supply issues, but I don't know if I could have done it anyway. Good Luck! I know you are determined, hopefully DH will come around!

HikerBride07 · June 2010

FWIW, I would not consider it a "surgery" or for there to be any "recovery time". The ENT snips the tissue with the equivalent of scissors, there is little to no blood, no pain, and almost immediate results. There are no stitches or meds, they did use a small amount of a numbing agent but that is more for the parents' piece of mind than any actual pain prevention. I don't see a reason for hesitation to do it, especially considering the potential for you to be unable to continue to keep your supply up by EP'ing.

cmh06 · June 2010

Will not getting it cut make possible speech problems in the future? If so, maybe you could convince DH that way.

Useonfire · June 2010

DS's is so severely short that it caused him to latch so poorly which caused many of my mastitis/BFing issues and led me to EP for a few months. If I could go back in time, I would have it clipped in the hospital. My pedi was so against it though, so we didn't do it. I also have a friend who is a pedi who says they can often grow/lengthen so she's not a fan of clipping unless it's impossible to BF. That being said, I'd convince your DH if you can.

****AWS**** · June 2010

We had issues and the LC at loudoun had us do the exact same thing except we just used the shield and ointment until he got better at latching and skipped getting his frenulum cut.

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