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2nd Trimester
mrsf123
member
WWYD?
mrsf123
member
Advice no longer needed. Thanks to those who were helpful!
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Re: WWYD?
I would go buy stuff for my kid.
I would never have counted on it in the first place as people say all kinds of things when they aren't actually in that situation.
my read shelf:
Wow, it sounds like there might be something else going on with SIL for her attitude towards you to change so dramatically. If she isn't willing to talk about it, I would just leave it alone, maybe she will bring it up when she is ready to talk about it. Maybe your pregnancy is making her second guess being done with having kids?
As for the stuff that was previously offered, I would just wait that out as well. If she changes her mind and offers it to you, great. If not, just get it elsewhere. I wouldn't want to accept anything and feel that I was being resented for it.
Same. She is probably emotional about it and is having trouble letting it go *incase* she gets pregnant (btw it sounds like she wants another kid and is worrying about getting the stuff back sooner than you want to give it).
doesn't want to talk about your pregnancy and she has a life?
my interpretation: either you are annoying the world with your pregnancy or else she is trying to get KU again and every spawner on earth is her enemy.
but in summary, I'd stop caring and move on. get your own stuff.
Is there any chance that they have been wanting to get pg again and have been having trouble? So maybe she is feeling resentful toward the fact that you're pg and she's not? Maybe it's even subconscious and she doesn't realize it. I once had a friend who swore she didn't want kids and didn't ever want to talk about kids, pg, or anything related. Come to find out, she was secretly facing some major IF issues.
I don't know if this is what's going on with your SIL, but it's just a thought. If she's just changed her mind and is treating you nasty, I'd say just forget the stuff and register for the stuff you need and buy what you don't get.
By the way, this is totally not what's happening. I talk about my pregnancy a normal amount. It certainly has not taken over my life. I have a lot of friends and talk happily with them about everything going on in all of our lives. I'm not the kind of person who dwells only on what's going on with me. She's just being a self-absorbed b*tch!
Wow! Judging from the snippy "I have a life and am tired of talking about your baby" comment I would assume she's feeling a bit jealous... I would do two things- #1 stop talking about LO with her for a while (as hard as that is) unless she brings it up first. #2 I would register for all that stuff and see what gets gifted to you and what does not. Maybe by the time your LO has arrived things will have smoothed over and she'll be ready to share again or you'll just have to purchase those things on your own...
As nice as it would be to have things given to you (if say, financially you cant afford them) wouldn't you want to have all your own things anyway?
Its unfortunate that shes gone back on her word, but like PPs said maybe there is an underlying problem shes not telling you.
Also, REGISTER for these things!! Its super fun!
Feel better. 
I am pretty much in agreement with what everyone has said. It's just really weird, because both she and my brother are adamant that they don't want any more children. My brother is a TERRIBLE liar so I don't think it's an IF issue. She got KU with each of her kids like immediately, I'm the one that had trouble. It's certainly possible.
We can certainly afford our own things and don't need anything from anyone. I'm just going to tell them that we're not interested in their things anymore.
Thanks everyone!
Because my brother is packing stuff up for us to take next weekend. It's all very uncomfortable.
Huh? i thought you said that they weren't going to give you anything now?
so she doesn't want to give it to you, but your brother is willing to give it to you anyway?
i think that this should be between you and your brother. make it a 2 minute discussion.
Seems like your brother and SIL are the ones that need to have the talk. If she doesnt want you to have the stuff and hes packing it, JMO
Exactly. Sorry I wasn't clear in the first place. My brother WANTS to give it to me (insists on giving most of it) and my SIL doesn't want to. So he's packing it all up, I feel like I'm in a really uncomfortable position!
Hi Labor Buddy!
I wonder if they are disagreeing on whether to have another kid behind the scenes and this is how it is playing itself out. I mentioned IF - which can happen after seemingly easy TTC times before... at any rate - don't get yourself in the middle of their disagreement.
Regardless, I would just say to the brother that you don't feel comfortable taking it if the SIL has misgivings but thank you and if things change to let you and DH know.
Why would you want someone else's stuff if they don't want to give it to you? Tell your brother you don't want it and go buy it yourself.
Yikes. Your assumptions are unbelievable. I wasn't aware that I got pregnant only because I was assuming I wouldn't have to buy anything. In fact, I wasn't aware that there were any plans for anyone to give me everything needed for a baby. Amazing. Thanks for the insight into my life. Gee Wiz. Somebody has their knickers in a twist.
and before you get all huffy mrsF, I am pretty sure that the evidence of your twisted knickers is readily apparent by the fact that you took the different path towards a dd. I mean, you might as well have just dd'd this post.
i am shuffling back to my first opinion about you being an aw about your pregnancy . and also, your SIL is a crank.