I'm not usually one to call someone out, but..

MrsBeckO · May 2010

I caught this in the post below about SAHMs of 9month olds and I was totally shocked.

lizrenee06:
10:30-roughly 1pm- independent play in PnP while i fold laundry, dishes, shower, etc.

Am I the only one who thinks its crazy that a baby would be kept in a PNP for 2 1/2 hours at a time?? Though we don't even have one at home, I can see how PNP's have their time and place.. but for that long each day? At one time?

My DD would be screaming her head off if she were confined in such a small space for that long. If I need to fold laundry while she's awake, I sit on the floor and let her play with some of the clothes while I fold. If I need to do the dishes, she comes in the kitchen with me and plays in her tupperware cabinet or gets a snack in the high chair. It never occurred to me to put her away somewhere while I do these things.. she enjoys "helping" me during the day and it gives us another chance to laugh and play and talk about what's going on.

Maybe I'm alone in this, but it made me sad to read that.

The end.

CalinsBride · May 2010

DS would NEVER stand for that. He will go in his PnP for roughly ten minutes without crying. I usually stick him in there while I pee or something, but that's it. I can't imagine him staying confined for that long. He wouldn't even play alone for that long if I allowed him to roam the house (which I do). He needs to check in with me frequently for snuggles, etc.

electricdoctor83 · May 2010

ehh, I WISH my 10 month old would stay in his PnP for that long so I could get things done. I'm just jealous

I think it's great that her baby will independent play for that long, Jack will play by himself for maybe 45 minutes before he needs me to entertain him.

mavilabride · May 2010

As far as I am concerned, you are alone in this opinion and very judgmental. Things don't come across the way they are meant online and you can't take everything to literal. I don't know a single child that can actually sit that long without calling out for attention so I'm sure her LO isn't confined to the PNP for the entire 2.5 hours. And if her LO is ok with independent play for that long and she can get stuff done, then kuddos to her. Maybe LO spends those 2 hours playing quietly and the rest of the day hanging out with momma. Also, a PNP is not the same as a bumbo. There's plenty of space to crawl around, stand, and play with toys.

Mommy2B_Hart · May 2010

No, my DS would never go for that. I'm with you, if I'm folding laundry, he's playing with the socks. Dishes are DH's job, so that's not a big deal, and pretty much any other house work, he's under foot, or it happens when DH comes home and can take him for a walk so they can have some time together and I can fly around the house like a mad woman.

ETA: I am not judging her, just jealous, because I know it would never happen in my world.

mavilabride · May 2010

Also and maybe it's "just me" but I would think your sadness would be better reserved for unhappy, unhealthy children who need your sympathy. Not a child with a good mom and one that plays happily.

StrawberryBlondeMomma · May 2010

My baby would never tolerate that either. Hopefully her LO enjoys it though.

Chrysallys · May 2010

I wouldn't do that to my DS, but then we don't even own a PNP because we hate them. I'll clean while wearing DS, while he naps, while DH is home, or let DS "help" by throwing some laundry around while I fold the others.

MrsBeckO · May 2010

mavilabride:
Also and maybe it's "just me" but I would think your sadness would be better reserved for unhappy, unhealthy children who need your sympathy. Not a child with a good mom and one that plays happily.

I know what a PNP is, and it still is crazy to me that a child be confined to a 3x2 space for that long each day.

And of course my heart breaks for children in unhappy, unhealthy homes.

mandolynn81 · May 2010

dd will play that long on the ivingroom floor as long as she can see me. A friend of mine has a baby that is the same way - plays by herself for long periods of time. But it does not mean that lizrenee does not engage her child throughout other times of the day. What is wrong if a baby is playing by themselves in a safe supervised area. It's not like she is running to the store and leaving the child at home.?

stephelias · May 2010

I put DD in the pnp if I have to leave the room to pee, make a bottle, etc. for short periods of time and occasionally I'll let her play independently for a few minutes in it. She wouldn't stand it much longer. Yeah it may seem like a long time to some of us but I'm sure her LO is content playing in there. Definitely not call-out worthy IMO.

ljlkm · May 2010

I don't believe a 9 month old plays alone happily in a pnp for that long. So either she takes him out periodically to play with him during that time or she just lets him cry--I certainly hope it's the former.

Heather & Nayt · May 2010

I gave that the side eye at first, but then i got thinking how my DS is very indepenant and is happy tearing around our living room by himself as long as I am with in sight and talking to him. God forbid i get out of his sight though.

Maybe her LO is happy in the PnP. (DS would freak out being in that small of space) And she is still around to interact with LO.

mariannerules · May 2010

DD can play by herself for good lengths of time, but that doesn't mean I let her. She does also like the PnP, yesterday I moved it out on the deck while I planted flowers in the pots. I was right there with her, talking to her, entertaining her and she was getting crabby near the end, about 30 min. I guess every baby is different, but that seems like an awfully long time.

sammiekc · May 2010

I don't see anything wrong with letting LO sit in a PNP for 2 hours if they are happy. DS will play (cruise around the PNP) for a little bit while I go to the bathroom, fold laundry, eat, etc. but not for 2 hours. At the most would be 30 minutes.

MrsBeckO · May 2010

I think its crazy because babies learn from what they see, hear, and experience. By having DD "help" me with what I need to do around the house, we have the chance to talk about clothes and colors and stacking and in/out of the basket, etc. We talk in the kitchen about the water and opening/closing the cabinet, and up/down, etc. We sing silly songs while we "work".. and she's learning from those, too. I just can't imagine what can possibly be learned from 2 1/2 hours of sitting in a PNP with a handful of toys.

I hope that you all are right and that she (severely) misstated what happens. Because saying 2 1/2 hrs of confinement - or "independent play" would be unacceptable care if it were my DD. I would freak my freak if I found out someone put my DD in a PNP that long. You can all think I'm crazy, I'm okay with that.

sammiekc · May 2010

MrsBeckO:
I just can't imagine what can possibly be learned from 2 1/2 hours of sitting in a PNP with a handful of toys.

Just because it's toys doesn't mean they aren't learning anything. They are using their imagination. I do get where you are coming from. But I like to think that mom didn't just ignore her LO for 2 1/2 hours. I am sure she went and checked on her LO every few minutes to make sure she was okay and to talk/play with her.

Heather577 · May 2010

mavilabride:
As far as I am concerned, you are alone in this opinion and very judgmental. Things don't come across the way they are meant online and you can't take everything to literal. I don't know a single child that can actually sit that long without calling out for attention so I'm sure her LO isn't confined to the PNP for the entire 2.5 hours. And if her LO is ok with independent play for that long and she can get stuff done, then kuddos to her. Maybe LO spends those 2 hours playing quietly and the rest of the day hanging out with momma. Also, a PNP is not the same as a bumbo. There's plenty of space to crawl around, stand, and play with toys.

This.

While I don't have a PNP, I have one of those Superyard XT things and DD is very content to play in there. It really saves me a lot of stress because I can get stuff done without worrying about her safety. It's big enough that I can get in there with her too.

mavilabride · May 2010

I'm sorry but I'm getting annoyed. You are being insanely judgmental and treating this poster as if she's a horrible mother. Newsflash: your solution is not a one size fits all and what works for you may not work for her. I personally cannot "wear" DD. It hurts my back immensely. When I do laundry, I don't have her "help" me because we have a small laundry room and small living room so I don't want her wrapped up in everything. When I cook, she's in her high chair, not on the floor. Just now I was putting clothes away in her room and she was playing on the floor and then in her crib when I knew I wouldn't be able to keep an eye on her. Does that make me an awful mom? Do I love my DD less than you love your LO? Let's cut back on the "I'm a perfect mommy and everyone else sucks if they don't do it my way" shall we?

CalinsBride · May 2010

MrsBeckO:

saying 2 1/2 hrs of confinement - or "independent play" would be unacceptable care if it were my DD. I would freak my freak if I found out someone put my DD in a PNP that long. You can all think I'm crazy, I'm okay with that.

I kind of have to agree with you. The original poster can do whatever she wants, its her kid. However, no way in hell would I allow a child care professional to get away with leaving my kid alone in a pnp for 2 and a half hours, whether he was content in there or not. And I'm pretty sure that most day care centres would not allow that unless the kid was napping or something.

stever · May 2010

There is absolutely no way DS would tolerate that.

CalinsBride · May 2010

Heather577:

mavilabride:
As far as I am concerned, you are alone in this opinion and very judgmental. Things don't come across the way they are meant online and you can't take everything to literal. I don't know a single child that can actually sit that long without calling out for attention so I'm sure her LO isn't confined to the PNP for the entire 2.5 hours. And if her LO is ok with independent play for that long and she can get stuff done, then kuddos to her. Maybe LO spends those 2 hours playing quietly and the rest of the day hanging out with momma. Also, a PNP is not the same as a bumbo. There's plenty of space to crawl around, stand, and play with toys.

This.

While I don't have a PNP, I have one of those Superyard XT things and DD is very content to play in there. It really saves me a lot of stress because I can get stuff done without worrying about what she's doing. It's big enough that I can get in there with her too.

A super XT yard is a totally different thing, IMO.

PoetSorrow · May 2010

I would LOVE if I had a LO who was content for 2+ hours at a time. There are roughly 16 waking hours in a day (If your baby even sleeps a full 8) so if a baby is happy playing independently, feeling secure enough knowing their mom is right there if they need them and can go 2 hours out of 16 in a safe play yard ...more power to that mommy. I don't see the difference from putting your LO in a high chair for 15 minutes, a swing for a half hour and so on throughout the day. At least she gets a nice long stretch to get things done. I know I'm jealous lol.

kit443 · May 2010

I just don't clean or fold laundry - problem solved!

MrsBeckO · May 2010

mavilabride:
I'm sorry but I'm getting annoyed. You are being insanely judgmental and treating this poster as if she's a horrible mother. Newsflash: your solution is not a one size fits all and what works for you may not work for her. I personally cannot "wear" DD. It hurts my back immensely. When I do laundry, I don't have her "help" me because we have a small laundry room and small living room so I don't want her wrapped up in everything. When I cook, she's in her high chair, not on the floor. Just now I was putting clothes away in her room and she was playing on the floor and then in her crib when I knew I wouldn't be able to keep an eye on her. Does that make me an awful mom? Do I love my DD less than you love your LO? Let's cut back on the "I'm a perfect mommy and everyone else sucks if they don't do it my way" shall we?

Wow. You are getting rather defensive. I have never said I was perfect. I have never said that poster is a horrible mother, I was just shocked at the length of time she listed and wondering if I was the only one who felt that was crazy and why/why not that may be.

And FTR, none of what you listed (even though this post had nothing to do with your day) would make me think you are an awful mom.

MrsBeckO · May 2010

CalinsBride:
Heather577:

mavilabride:
As far as I am concerned, you are alone in this opinion and very judgmental. Things don't come across the way they are meant online and you can't take everything to literal. I don't know a single child that can actually sit that long without calling out for attention so I'm sure her LO isn't confined to the PNP for the entire 2.5 hours. And if her LO is ok with independent play for that long and she can get stuff done, then kuddos to her. Maybe LO spends those 2 hours playing quietly and the rest of the day hanging out with momma. Also, a PNP is not the same as a bumbo. There's plenty of space to crawl around, stand, and play with toys.

This.
While I don't have a PNP, I have one of those Superyard XT things and DD is very content to play in there. It really saves me a lot of stress because I can get stuff done without worrying about what she's doing. It's big enough that I can get in there with her too.
A super XT yard is a totally different thing, IMO.

I agree. Totally different scenario with a SuperYard enclosure. A PNP is roughly 2x3ft (the bigger ones).

Heather577 · May 2010

CalinsBride:
Heather577:

mavilabride:
As far as I am concerned, you are alone in this opinion and very judgmental. Things don't come across the way they are meant online and you can't take everything to literal. I don't know a single child that can actually sit that long without calling out for attention so I'm sure her LO isn't confined to the PNP for the entire 2.5 hours. And if her LO is ok with independent play for that long and she can get stuff done, then kuddos to her. Maybe LO spends those 2 hours playing quietly and the rest of the day hanging out with momma. Also, a PNP is not the same as a bumbo. There's plenty of space to crawl around, stand, and play with toys.

This.

While I don't have a PNP, I have one of those Superyard XT things and DD is very content to play in there. It really saves me a lot of stress because I can get stuff done without worrying about what she's doing. It's big enough that I can get in there with her too.

A super XT yard is a totally different thing, IMO.

Maybe so. There is a lot more room in the Superyard. But if the issue is "confinement", then it isn't too different. I do spend quite a bit of time inside the Superyard with her though.

CalinsBride · May 2010

Heather577:
CalinsBride:
Heather577:

mavilabride:
As far as I am concerned, you are alone in this opinion and very judgmental. Things don't come across the way they are meant online and you can't take everything to literal. I don't know a single child that can actually sit that long without calling out for attention so I'm sure her LO isn't confined to the PNP for the entire 2.5 hours. And if her LO is ok with independent play for that long and she can get stuff done, then kuddos to her. Maybe LO spends those 2 hours playing quietly and the rest of the day hanging out with momma. Also, a PNP is not the same as a bumbo. There's plenty of space to crawl around, stand, and play with toys.

This.

While I don't have a PNP, I have one of those Superyard XT things and DD is very content to play in there. It really saves me a lot of stress because I can get stuff done without worrying about what she's doing. It's big enough that I can get in there with her too.

A super XT yard is a totally different thing, IMO.

Maybe so. There is a lot more room in the Superyard. But if the issue is "confinement", then it isn't too different. I do spend quite a bit of time inside the Superyard with her though.

Maybe the original poster has a kiddo who is very mellow. I wouldn't know anything about that. My DS is alllll over the place. All the time. So a Super yard would still allow him to get his wiggles out. A p n p doesn't really have room to crawl around, KWIM?

mavilabride · May 2010

Saying it made you sad to read pretty much tells me you feel sorry for her child. I have no issue with you, never have , but this seems unfair to the OP and since you chose to call her out, I'm choosing to defend that she shouldn't be viewed as a horrible mother.

Heather577 · May 2010

CalinsBride:
Heather577:
CalinsBride:
Heather577:

mavilabride:
As far as I am concerned, you are alone in this opinion and very judgmental. Things don't come across the way they are meant online and you can't take everything to literal. I don't know a single child that can actually sit that long without calling out for attention so I'm sure her LO isn't confined to the PNP for the entire 2.5 hours. And if her LO is ok with independent play for that long and she can get stuff done, then kuddos to her. Maybe LO spends those 2 hours playing quietly and the rest of the day hanging out with momma. Also, a PNP is not the same as a bumbo. There's plenty of space to crawl around, stand, and play with toys.

This.

While I don't have a PNP, I have one of those Superyard XT things and DD is very content to play in there. It really saves me a lot of stress because I can get stuff done without worrying about what she's doing. It's big enough that I can get in there with her too.

A super XT yard is a totally different thing, IMO.

Maybe so. There is a lot more room in the Superyard. But if the issue is "confinement", then it isn't too different. I do spend quite a bit of time inside the Superyard with her though.

Maybe the original poster has a kiddo who is very mellow. I wouldn't know anything about that. My DS is alllll over the place. All the time. So a Super yard would still allow him to get his wiggles out. A p n p doesn't really have room to crawl around, KWIM?

That's true. DD learned how to walk in her Superyard. LOL It definitely hasn't slowed her down...but it does keep her safe.

mavilabride · May 2010

Since CB mentioned it I will also add that my DD is super mellow. I can sit her in her crib while I sort through her laundry, prepare her bath, or make her something to eat with nothing but a 10 page book and she'll sit quietly flipping through each page. Maybe that's why I'm not horrified by it.

CalinsBride · May 2010

mavilabride:
Since CB mentioned it I will also add that my DD is super mellow. I can sit her in her crib while I sort through her laundry, prepare her bath, or make her something to eat with nothing but a 10 page book and she'll sit quietly flipping through each page. Maybe that's why I'm not horrified by it.

One jealous mom right here!

rosesandpeonies · May 2010

We have a playzone for dd (onestepahead.com) with 5 extra extensions which makes it go the whole space of the living room. Then we have the foam number tiles for the floor, and that is what I put her in to play. She would never stay in a play yard. I also don't put her in there that long all by herself. I play with her, she does independent play, we go out and do things together. It is a great thing for her to be safe in and for her to crawl around and work on her pulling up and cruising, but she would never stay there for 2.5 hours.

smellycat15 · May 2010

Just because your LO doesn't like it doesn't mean its something bad to do. DD almost never lets me play with her. She can sit in her exersaucer for an hour and be perfectly content. She can roll around on the floor and play with her toys without me. I dont need to "teach" her anything yet. She's 11 months old. Once she is old enough to actually help then I will happily ask for her to help me fold clothes or clean. ASSuming she isn't checking in on her LO or talking to her LO while she is doing stuff around the house is just wrong. Whos to say what she does while her LO is in her PNP. And no where in there did she say it was a straight 2.5 hrs. I would ask the OP some questions before getting sad about what her LO goes through. This call out was unnecessary. You sound like a jealous judgmental A-hole.

Sweets2005 · May 2010

I wouldn't call someone out by the screen name! You don't know the whole situation. Often times the babies who can play independently have the strongest attachments with their moms and are very secure and confident kids. Mine play independently a lot. Would I let them do it for 2.5 hours at a time? No. But maybe she meant somewhere in that time frame, the baby goes in there while she does a few quick chores.

lizrenee06 · May 2010

smellycat15:
. You sound like a jealous judgmental A-hole.

i heart you. lmao.

so let me clarify....

NO, he isnt in there 2 1/2 hours straight

YES, he can always see me & i am constantly talking to him telling him what i'm doing/why i'm doing it..."we fold clothes so they fit nicely in the dresser"

YES, he does get bored. i stop what i'm doing, play with him for a bit & put him back in the PnP. if he's not having the PnP, then it's the exersaucer or johnny jump

YES, you have nothing better than to call people out. congratulations

look people, i have a larger home. lots of places for him to get hurt, lots of electrical sockets for him to play with. i feel it safer to put him in his pnp vs letting him roam free. my insurance prefers it, too

MrsBeckO · May 2010

smellycat15:
You sound like a jealous judgmental A-hole.

Usually when someone says "from x time until y time..." it means straight. If you got a party invitation that said "12-3", would you not think that meant noon to 3, straight? I wouldn't say I was ASSuming anything there.

Jealous? In no way, shape, or form am I even a little bit jealous that she "can" put her baby down for any length of time. Not even a tiny bit.

Judgmental? I've already said I am fine with a bunch of internet strangers thinking that.

A-hole? How very mature. Name-calling is right there with judging, no?

And lizrenee - thank you for clarifying, even though you didn't feel you needed to. Your explanation sounds much better than your original wording. You have to admit the way you typed that your LO is in a PNP from 1030-1 sounds worse than what you just said.

MrsBatty · May 2010

Well Becko ... looks like you and I are taking the same crazy pills, b/c I totally agree with every point you've made.

I don't blame you for questioning that statement. At all.

meg1974 · May 2010

DD wouldn't tolerate being in a PnP - or anywhere else for that matter - for 2 1/2 hours. Sometimes she screams when I put her in it just to go to the bathroom. I do let her crawl around on the floor for 20 minutes or so at a time while I get things done (I can always see her), and sometimes I even feel guilty about that. DH has to remind me that independent play is good for her, and if she didn't like it, she would let me know.

trackchik6 · May 2010

kit443:
I just don't clean or fold laundry - problem solved!

lol me either! But that's b/c DS won't sit in the pnp happily for even 5 mins.. if i am lucky i can get 10 mins in the exersaucer.

Gina1221 · May 2010

mavilabride:
As far as I am concerned, you are alone in this opinion and very judgmental. Things don't come across the way they are meant online and you can't take everything to literal. I don't know a single child that can actually sit that long without calling out for attention so I'm sure her LO isn't confined to the PNP for the entire 2.5 hours. And if her LO is ok with independent play for that long and she can get stuff done, then kuddos to her. Maybe LO spends those 2 hours playing quietly and the rest of the day hanging out with momma. Also, a PNP is not the same as a bumbo. There's plenty of space to crawl around, stand, and play with toys.

Could not agree more!

Maybe her child doesn't nap well. My DS only takes little cat naps and I have to be holding him when he does nap. I also work outside the home. Therefore, housework needs to get done at some point. I put my DS in his PNP sometimes when I need to get things done, like clean. I'd rather him sit and play happily in a safe PNP so that I can clean, rather than him have to crawl around a dirty floor because I don't have time to clean and wear dirty clothes because I don't have time to do laundry.

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