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Babies: 3 - 6 Months
msnehz
member
Working mom missing "first time" milestones
msnehz
member
My mom just called me here at work all excited and told me Mia just rolled over from her back to her tummy. I'm excited and sad at the same time. It seems silly to be sad since I'll get to see her do it again when we get home but there's just something about "first time" that makes it special. It's moments like this when I wish I'm a stay at home mom.
Anyone else missed seeing LO doing something for the first time?
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Re: Working mom missing "first time" milestones
I asked them to record it and if they don't, then don't tell me. That way I can see it for the first time without knowledge of it not being the first.
I SAH now, but I went back to work after my first son was born. As if my first day at work wasn't hard enough, DH called and told me that Samuel rolled over for the first time--that day! Ugh, I was so pissed.
You're just going to have to find a happy place about it. Does it suck? Yeah, it sucks. You'll feel guilty for not being there. But if you're providing for your child and doing the best you can as LO's mother, everything will be okay.
Another thing you might consider--if you feel terrible, how about asking your mother to NOT tell you when LO does these things? I always wanted to know, even if it made me feel like crap, but that's just me. My own mother worked and our sitter never told her when we did "firsts" because anytime my mother saw them, they were "firsts" for her.
Our DCP is the same as some others mentioned, they do not tell us about them. I was visiting one day and she rolled over for the first time that I saw. The DCP was like, "oh that has never happened before," and then had a little smile with the other worker. My SIL made a nice comment when I went back to work that made me feel better. She said, "It does not count until Mom see it."
I'm almost positive that DS rolled over at DC before he did at home because the first day we saw him rolling he was such a pro at it. But they don't tell us things like that.
But then, the first time he did it at home, I was in the shower!
He did it again, though, and again and again and again...
Exactly this. I SAH, but I had a concussion last week and I have a bad upper respiratory infection. I've been instructed to "take it easy", so my brother has been over for the last three days, taking care of DD. Just a few minutes ago, DD acted like she was about to crawl, and I couldn't get in there fast enough. It's just life, I guess.
I am a SAHM and I missed the first time DD rolled over too. I was at Target and she was home with DH. I was pretty sad about it. What I am trying to say is don't beat yourself up about it. There are tons more firsts that you will see
. If it really bothers you just tell your mom to keep those things to herself.
TTC #1- unexplained...lost left ovary 4/07 IUI #1 2/10/09-BFN IUI #2 3/5/09-BFN IVF # 1-BFP
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DS goes to a home daycare. I was very excited to tell the women watching him that if he does any firsts while in her care she is under no circumstances to tell us. If we didn't see it... it didn't happen!
Sorry, but that won't be the last thing you miss. LO can squirm all around his crib, sometimes he rolls, sometimes he moves from one end to the other. I was looking at the monitor while I was in the bathroom 'tmi'...looked away and he was in another position. I work as well, but that's just an example of things being miss.
I'm sorry you missed it, but I'm sure LO will show you her new trick!
I know my daycare doesn't tell me when Tegan does things at daycare for the first time. I've gone in once or twice and made the comment that she started doing something at home and they always give me a little smile and say, "That's great!" I know that they've probably already seen it before, lol!
The thing is that she spends a majority of the day on the floor at daycare. It's pretty much a guarantee that she's going to figure out some things at daycare before she figures them out at home. Like plenty of the PPs have said, it doesn't count until I see it at home.
I try to be happy about any milestone that she meets, whether I see it first or not. I actually like the fact that she's in daycare because I think she's met some milestones faster than she would've at home because she's on the floor and playing independently so often at daycare.
I told my mom that if we were OOT and she kept Cooper to not tell me if he did anything like that. I'd rather live in ignorant bliss.
They daycare doesn't mention things until he's been doing it a while at home. I don't know if it doesn't come up or if they just wait a few days thinking surely he's done it at home also...
If he does something super crazy like crawl or walk first at daycare I would be sad to miss it, but it could just as easily happen one night I'm out with the girls and he's home with DH.
The day before Mother's Day DH brought DS to his parents house while he went out shopping for me a gift and so I could sleep in. Well, here I am getting ready and DH calls me to tell me that his mom told him that DS just rolled over. I cried and cried. Then the next day at church my MIL went on and on about it. I finally very rudly told her that it did not happen and that she should know that you are not suppose to tell the mom when she did not get to see it herself. My mom knows this and if something happens while I am at work she won't tell me. In all actuallity I don't even think he really did roll over because they said from tummy to back. Last week he started rolling from back to tummy and can't go the other way.
Sorry you missed this special moment.