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Baby Showers
Baby/Bridal Shower Etiquette Questions
Alright, the girls on here seem to be very familiar with etiquette so I shall post this question to you-
If a girl decides to get married once she finds out she is pregnant, is she to expect both a bridal and a baby shower. I say yes; they are two seperate events. My mother and sister say "no," because the only reason she is getting married is because of the baby, she needs to forego the bridal shower.
My DH has a lot of this going on in his family and my family and I got into interesting discussion and so I thought I would post and see what everyone says. I am just curious.
Update: I.E. One cousin is getting married in July, having her bridal shower in June, she is due in October and is expecting a September/August baby shower. So there will pretty well be something going on for her every month between now and October.
This discussion has been closed.
Re: Baby/Bridal Shower Etiquette Questions
IMO, they are two seperate events. Who is to say they would not have gotten married despite getting pregnant (in fact, I HOPE they would have been planning on getting married despite the baby, since that is a crap reason to get married)
Many people have both babies and wedding in the same year, or close to it. Many people have 2 showers celebrating both events.
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No she is not. The wedding is only happening b/c of baby so, both showers should not be expected.
If the couple was engaged and got pregnant just a few weeks before the wedding, I would maybe feel differently but, having a wedding b/c you are pregnant does not warrant both a baby and wedding shower.
they are 2 sep events -- hopefully months apart.
For example - Its in bad taste to have a wedding shower, wedding, and baby shower all in one month.
I don't know about entitled or not, but I am not sure I would go to both. Perhaps if they were really far apart, like the bridal shower now and the baby shower in 7 months or so.
I had a friend that got engaged, then got pregnant and had to move the wedding up. Eventhough she was already planning on getting married, she did not have a bridal shower. They had a small wedding and then focused on the babies ... yep, twin girls.
This is true. None of my books specifically address this issue. I think I would feel awkward getting two showers like that...but it is just me.
For example...I had college graduation in May 07, Bridal Shower in July 07, Birthday in August and Wedding in September 07. I chose to forgo a graduation party and birthday party because I felt like I was being gift grabby if I invited people to all four events.
Also, I think that the best way to go about the events would be Bridal Shower, Wedding, then Baby Shower, even if they were back to back to back...if it was not in this order (and all three events were happening) I think it would be a little weird.
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This is how I feel. They are separate but because of the condensed timeframe there's no way I'd feel comfortable with people buying me bridal shower presents and baby presents so close to one another. I just wouldn't no matter who offered to throw what and who tried to convince me otherwise. I would feel too gift grabby but that is me.
As a PP said, showers are given by others, so it is not for someone to expect or plan for herself. If the woman's family/friends want to throw her two showers, great. If they don't, she can't ask for one. It doesn't matter why she's getting married. Lots of people get married for bad reasons, but they still get showers.