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triciaj1
member
flypink.. and others esp those that hate the TBPS posts
triciaj1
member
I could care less about the TBPS site, so dont take this as advocating posting stuff from this site. I did do this today and saw a lot of "don't post that stuff here it's hurtful". Which I get kind of...
I get that the content is hurtful, hence we post the ones that piss us off. But what I don't get is the whole surrounding bump culture.
We say "don't post stuff that makes you mad here it just hurts people" i.e TBPS/other boards drama etc...
BUT posts about insensitive stuff that others say to us or we hear get a totally different response. It's still post with insensitive content. I get that we get support after someone hurts our feelings, but TBPS is someone hurting our feelings, so why not come here for support.
In more personal stories we don't OMIT the offending comment and just ask for support, we put it out there for all to read just as TBPS posts do.
Again, I won't post anymore of them but I also don't care if anyone else does. It's just an interesting area of bump culture.
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Re: flypink.. and others esp those that hate the TBPS posts
If it was something that was said to me personally, I might post it here for support. Post Secret is totally avoidable (and in fact I've decided to avoid it myself because of that very one that was posted below).
That being said, of course this is a public message board, yada yada, that's JMO.
What is TBPS?
EDIT: I knwo now...The Bump Post Secret. RIght?
Married my best friend 05.27.06
BFP!!! 2/6/11 Super Bowl Sunday!
Expecting our first, a little boy, somewhere around 10/18/11!
2/7/11 beta #1 212.73
2/11/11 beta #2 1,633
2/15/11 beta #3 7,308 progesterone 12.69
Wow, incredibly valid point.
I suppose the difference will be IRL versus some website.
Ultimately, there is no difference though as for most of us, someone elses IRL is just a message post to us.
I presume when it comes to IRL, its a matter of outwardly looking for sympathy, which, gets sympathy.
DS 6.12.11
Hypermenorrhea, Anovulatory & Hypothyroid
TTC#2
My Lack of Ovulation Chart
I said this earlier, it isn't so much that they get reposted, it is just when one gets reposted here, then it seems many people jump on the bandwagon and starts new thread about all the awful crap just to try and "one up" the horribleness of the first post.
IMHO, if you repost one to open a conversation about it, how it hurt your feelings or for example, the adoption question that resulted from the first one, then it reposting for good reason. If someone is just reposting it to repost it then I think that is something different and is just encouraging people to post more crap on TBPS for the attention.
Does that make any sense?
BFP 3/17/10 Missed M/C Confirmed 4/12/10
MIF+Unexplained DX Feb 2012: Femara+Trigger+IUI=BFP
An annoying blog where people from here go to say crap they don't have the guts to say here with their names attached. It's interesting yet also lame..
I haven't been around here much in the last couple of weeks, so I haven't seen too many of the TBPS posts. But I have been here for the "nuggets" and the drama posted from some of the other boards.
I think for me, the difference is that I feel sympathy when someone posts about an insensitive comment. They often catch us off-guard, sometimes in public places, and often in front of others. They can be very hurtful because of the public and unexpected nature.
The TBPS and nuggets from other boards are generally things that people go digging for. If you're offended by what's on there, don't go look. I had no clue what TBPS was until kdodge told me. I looked and haven't been back since. I also rarely lurk on other boards, especially those which tend to have posts that might upset me.
Yes it does. I was just wondering. Bc really someone could just post the content from TBPS as a IRL story and it'd be a completely different response.
Ummm. I don't know what post you are talking about or what TBPS is.
My comment was regarding the usually posts from 1st tri about people getting KU on the first cycle, etc.
But I see what you are getting at. When people IRL hurt our feelings it and we vent about it here it is much different than searching other boards to post here so we can all share in the misery. Understand?
Agreed, but again...one would generally be an unsolicited, unexpected situation (hence, sympathy). The other would be something that someone went and searched out (hence, less sympathy from me).
Personally I don't care for that sight. It was made so that cowards could say how they really feel since they don't have the balls to say it here.
As for the one you posted earlier the way I see it, my infertility or what I do with my body is nobodies fvcking business. Adoption isn't always an option and the person who wrote that is a dumbasss by far.
Oh and Tricia PW much today? lol
I was just talking about your post in TTGP rules post. I do get it, but I guess I didn't really think that people "searched" for upsetting things to repost. I thought that they were caught off guard while doing something (lurking, playing on the internet) and were offended.. being similar to the IRL experience.
LOL I was waiting for that call out.. YES YES YES call me a PW today. Today is my one day a week DH and I have decided I can bump all I want. Other days I try to limit it, and one day a week he has a "free day". I just have soo much to say!!!
LMAO You get backed up, huh?
I agree. To me personally, because the assumption is that TBPS come from Bumpies, I feel like I walk a line between giving them attention by calling them out for being the hurtful fools that they are which that will make them know they got under my skin and maybe encourage them to post more (the miscarriage one was especially hard for me) or do I not give them the satisfaction and just ignore it. If I thought it would do more harm than good to confront them here, I might would do that.
I guess the difference is in an IRL vent the odds of the person being on the bump and using that vent to do more harm is low, where as with a TBPS vent the odds are greater.
BFP 3/17/10 Missed M/C Confirmed 4/12/10
MIF+Unexplained DX Feb 2012: Femara+Trigger+IUI=BFP
AHHHHH now there's a point I never thought about. I never thought about someone so rude getting satisfaction about us talking about their dumb PS.
I think if they're on TBPS, there's no other assumption to make. There's not going to be anything positive obtained from that site, so I don't see how anyone could get caught off-guard lurking there. At all.
Tricia - I went back and read your post about the IF post secret. My first thought when looking at it is - this OP has nothing better to do than to look through this site (as it has been unfortunately popular to do lately) to try and find something controversial that will make the TTGPer's upset. The OP is probably hoping for a "so sorry you had to see that" response.
Maybe not what happened at all - just letting you know how others (me) view those posts.
For me, its those that go looking on 1st tri for nuggets or go to these other websites where they KNOW they will find something flameworthy, upsetting, insulting, etc and bring it back here.
Yes we can discuss whatever here, but I feel as though if you are going to look for it, then you're looking for drama and to cause controversy since usually those people are either a) not even on this board or b) too cowardly to bring that shiit here and have to make a separate blog for it as a cry for attention where they can hide behind anonymity. I don't go looking for that type of crap because I don't need drama, nor do I want to try to hurt my own feelings as well as others.
If someone posts here, who is apart of this board, about something that happened to them directly, that is someone sharing with the people in a community they feel as though is there for them for support/sympathy/empathy, etc. There is a world of difference IMO.
That is a precise statement.
*ducks*
LOL you win, i lose.. oops