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Significance of age
In light of the recent posts about age, I'm just curious if age makes that much of a difference to people IRL. I know that the OP said she just wanted to find people closer to her age so that she'd have more in common with them, but doesn't the fact that we're all TTC give us all something in common?
For me personally, MH and I have a big group of close friends that we hang out with all the time. The ages in the group range from 23-33, with at least one person at each year. For the most part, I have never really noticed much an age difference between all us (with the exception of the one 27 y.o couple that acts like they're still 20). I guess that I just think that if you're at similar points in your life, then age is just a number and doesn't mean shiit.
Anyone else feel this way?
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Re: Significance of age
I feel the same way. DH and I are 29 & 32. Our group of friends ranges in age from 25-35 or so. Maturity is the most important thing, I think. Age is just a number.
It makes somewhat of a difference to me. I can tell a difference in maturity on my local board with a lot of the "younger" posters versus the "older" ladies, and sometimes I notice it here. I'm almost 31. I've been out of college/grad school for a long time and I don't even remember what it was like to go out partying anymore. It's been YEARS since I've been able to drink in the middle of the week (other than a beer or a glass of wine) because I can't do my job if I'm exhausted or hungover.
I do feel like we all have something in common here with TTC, but I don't think there's anything wrong with acknowledging that it can be nice to talk to people closer to your own age.
FWIW, I have very few friends who are younger than 27 or 28, I think. Some of my friends have younger siblings that we might hang out with occasionally, but for the most part, all of my friends are close to 30 or over 30.
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I am in my late 20's and my husband is in his 40's... our friends are all in between and we all get along great! I do not think age matters (obvi my husband is a lot older than me) its more of where you are in life
Edit: Missing a word - no coffee yet this AM
The age thing is a part of the "Mommy Wars"...that crap never ends.
"Oh I wanted to be a YOUNG mom and have time to enjoy my children! I want to be young enough to play with them, and get them out of the house so DH and I can be alone in our 40-50s! I won't be too decrepit to play with them, yay!"
"Oh we wanted to wait until we were OLDER and more SETTLED to have kids. We got to have our 20's/30's to be young. Now it is time for kids!"
It fits with the BF v. FF, FF v. RF, Natural v. Drugs blah blah blah that I try to tune out.
Both sides have a point and neither side sees the other side in the least. My aunt was 43 when she had her first baby (total oops baby!) and she has way more energy than me. I was 30 when my kid was born.
P.S. I am friends with people much younger and much older than I am.
I totally agree with you and you said it way better than I ever could have.
It does get under my skin at times when people specifically ask for people in their age range as if by me being older means I can't have anything in common with them. I guess at the ripe old age of 32, I am an automatic kill-joy, LOL
(I hope you ladies can hear my sarcasm in that last sentence)
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OMG, you're 32?? Well, I'm only 29 so we can't talk any more...
All of our friends range in age from late 20's to early 40's, hell, even some in their 60's! (I hang with my mom and her friends a lot!)
I view everyone as "my age" after 30.
ETA: Patty's point about "Mommy Wars", I would've loved to have been a "young mom", but it took me a long time to find the person I wanted to have kids with. I don't consider myself old at all, but sometimes I need help getting up off the floor when playing with my kid! lol
I see both sides because I had "planned" my life when I was a teenager that I would have kids in my late 20's for some of the reasons Patty mentioned. Well isn't if funny how life turns out because I didn't even meet the man of my dreams until I was 29, married at 31...and he's six years older than me!
As for friends, IRL our friends range in age from 26-45 but we do like to mock the young one for his party life style and give "Old folks" jokes to the older ones...it's just fun because they are friends and can take it. Here on a board you can't hear sarcasim as well and some people don't think of others feeling when they type what they think.
I don't begrudge someone who wants e friends close to their age, but I chose not to care. I like who I like based on their responces...not their age.
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LOL, my point exactly
Thank goodness DH didn't think that way cause he's 40!!
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If I wear my hair down, my grays are hidden and people think I'm about 22 and DH is losing his hair, so people think he's closer to 40... So we get some odd looks in public... We both find it pretty funny though! I'm glad YH didn't mind "robbing the cradle", lol!
I agree with this. dh and I are both 25 and our closest friends are 28-30.
I never planned on being a youngish mom, but when you get to certain points in your life, you can't help exactly where they fall on your life timeline. My Mom had her last kid when she was 38 - I can definitely attest that having kids later keeps you younger
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Matthew Kevin
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LOL! That's hilarious! DH turned 40 in March (we went to Vegas) and I turn 33 in the summer...oh wait, I think I just heard a bone crack after typing 33!!
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LOL! At your age, you have to worry about osteoporosis!
I think age is all relative. Our main group of friends range in age 32 (me and one girlfriend) to 49. Not to mention the 18-year-old son on one couple and his 16-year-old girlfriend who hang out with us. Even within all the couples, there is some sort of significant age difference--5 years, 9 years, 7 years.
But, you wouldn't know it when we're together.
I think it matters to some people for whatever reason, but I think the big thing for me is maturity or lack of--and not in a bad way. My friends who are older probably lack a little maturity and some of us who are "younger" are a bit on the more mature side, so we all even out.
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